To tell my husband he'll have to come home from work now.

[CanIScreamPlease]

I have absolutely had fucking enough today.

I am minding my step children whilst DH has had to go into work (self employed but had a job on today).

The kids are being absolutely awful. They are arguing, fighting, shouting at each other. I am so fed up I feel I could literally scream. I've had to put them in seperate rooms for the afternoon. I'm about to ring my husband and tell him to come home because I really can't be fucking arsed with it any longer.

I know it sounds like a ridiculous excuse but I'm on my period and I have really bad problems with low mood when I am, so much so that I've seen the GP and been given ADs to take 10 days a month because of the low mood.

I am at my absolute wits end with them today and I am so angry. I feel like if I hear one more moan or argument I'm going to just drive them to his work and drop them off.

How long until he finishes?

He usually gets back about 7.

How old are they? Can you stick a film on the telly?

They were literally physically fighting just before. I just can't be doing with it today.

Would you do this is they were your children?

No, he has to come home.

They are his children, contact should be so that HE spends time with them as well as takes responsibility for them!!

So he 'had a job on today.' Nice that parenting is optional because you'll pick up the slack.

Can you stick a film on the telly?

I've told them they aren't allowed in the same room as each other for the rest of the day until dad gets home.

I don't mean that in a rude way. Just asking. Coz if they were yours would you deal with them differently

I would ring him, maybe even if he talks to them on the phone to get them to pack it in, if that doesn’t work, I’d expect the cheeks of his arse to be home pronto

Would you do this is they were your children?

Would I tell my husband to come home and deal with his fighting children if I was having a really hard day with them? Yes probably.

I would ring him and ask him to come home.

But they arent her child it would be completely different situation. How old are the fc and why has childcare fallen on you? Put your foot down.

Does he have the sort of job he can leave flexibly?

I don’t think you can just bail on childcare today. I understand why you’re frustrated though.

YANBU.
Does he leave you to look after his children often? Or is this a one off.
Of course as their their stepmum it is reasonable for you to be involved and spend time with them, but you aren't the nanny.
Surely they should be spending time with him?

If he were in paid employment with a manager would you be summoning him home?

I don't want to miss the point but antidepressants prescribed for 10 days a month sounds unusual, many of them take a few weeks to have any effect.
If the kids are safe in separate rooms then I'd grab a coffee and give yourself a few minutes breathing space. Hopefully at this hour of the day it won't be too much longer until your husband is home and then I'd tell him you want some time to yourself and go for a walk or a soak in the bath. It might feel rubbish right at this minute but the day will end.

I would stick it out for the rest of the day and then tonight you can tell him he needs to find other child care.

Nah I get it. He went off to work when he's meant to be spending time with them knowing you feel a bit shit.

How old are they?

Ate they old enough to be home alone while you get a breath of air?

If he were in paid employment with a manager would you be summoning him home?

What's the point of that? He isn't so it's irrelevant.

If they are in separate rooms then just leave them to it.

But have a plan going forward so that it doesn’t happen again.

They are both just under ten.

Anti depressants for ten days a month for PMS is a standard treatment. Not convinced it works though but hope it does for you OP

You’re absolutely not over reacting OP. I know my period would probably have had me demented with just one irritating child let alone three! Whosever they were.

Why are you caring for his responsibilities? The whole point that they get time with daddy is to spend time with daddy but then he ducks off to work and leaves you doing unpaid childminding?

What’s the alternative? Does their mother work too and knows you end up looking after them and they don’t see their dad until evening?

Are they behaving themselves now in the separate rooms?