Family member invited me for a picnic then asked me to provide the food, CF or not?

[BlueBlueAndPink]

A member of my family has been looking forward to restrictions being loosened so we could meet up and they could see the children. They invited us (me and the children) for a socially distanced picnic.

They then asked me to provide the food "you can sort the food can't you"

Getting the children ready for days out and leaving the house takes forever as it is and I find that stressful enough, this person doesn't have children so doesn't appreciate that.

Am I being a spoil sport or are they a CF?

@toomuchtooyoung 🙈so sorry for the mix up!
Bit of an @ fail there!

canigooutyet Absolutely! Im sorry you've been struggling, I have enormous empathy for people in the shielding group. I struggled with my MH during the first 4-6 weeks of lockdown despite being able to go out and shop, it must be extremely tough being told you can't venture outside at all.

Thank you for your kind words and your perspective

OP ignore the hysteria on here.

It would be fine if you went to a park with your children, and there happened to be a couple of unrelated ladies sitting a few metres away, so if you can keep your distance, I don't see why it makes any difference if the couple of ladies sat a few metres away are your mum & your aunt.

You all know if you are especially vulnerable, you can make a call.

Thank you to the reasonable folk on the thread who don't agree that I'm neglecting my children or killing people. Some of the contributors are nuts.

None of us have any pre existing conditions or are considered vulnerable. My household has already had the virus and quarantined for the required time in April. My mother and aunt only leave the house to go shopping and haven't met up with anybody else, nor have I.

We were all satisfied with our risk assessments and glad we went ahead.

Mental health is just as important, as the poster above rightly pointed out.

OP people are bat shit and quite simply not capable of reasonably assessing the actual risk here, which for most of us is low/comparable to a bad bout of seasonal flu.

I agree completely NoI

Those people won't give a shit about the people who are suffering from nervous breakdowns due to isolation, so long as they don't meet up with anybody outside their household.

But the point is none of us sit 2m away from strangers,chatting to them face to face?

Strangers in a supermarket are 30 seconds in close contract. People in the park you do not know don't sit that close to you and talk to you? We'd all move away if any stranger did that.
So it's not that strangers are allowed, just that strangers don't create the same risk as we interact less with them.

Plenty of people chat in the queues of supermarkets, and as I said some of these queues you're waiting over half an hour in.

I personally wouldn't get up and move if somebody struck up a conversation with me in the park, and they were standing 2 metres away.

This lockdown is making some people very antisocial and some actually a bit rude.

I had to take a bus to the doctors a couple of weeks ago for DD's immunizations, there were others on the bus chatting with people from their seats. If one of them posted on here to ask if they WBU to have done that they'd be hung drawn and quartered.

The doctor seeing DD happily chatted with me whilst giving her injections, she wasn't 2m away from me.

Before the screens went up in supermarkets cashiers would still chat over the conveyor belt.

There's absolutely need to be antisocial or to avoid people completely.

We're not going to eradicate the virus by avoiding our families like the plague, all that's needed is common sense and to conduct a reasonable risk assessment.

We'll have to live with this for the foreseeable.

No need to be antisocial**

that strangers don't create the same risk as we interact less with them

That simply isn’t true. I’ve an impossibility cute and pretty little dog. I chat to a huge assortment of strangers every day when we’re out while they get a bit of therapy from petting her. And no, the virus can’t be transmitted on animal fur.

@BlueBlueAndPink No need to apologise but thanks.
I’m surprised to still free to get online lol. Sometimes it feels like a massive fuck off everywhere but here.

But I’m enjoying life. Shame it’s coming to and end in a way. As the weeks pass more people will be around during the day. But means more places will be open at night. Midnight cinema screening makes you wonder what took you so long 🤣

Oh don’t people sometimes do that?
Outside just existing, and you have interesting chats with people you’ve never met before?

It’s not small talk but an actual conversation with someone you’ve never met before?

I must attract them, although thankfully not the small talkers. On a long journey somewhere and talking with others.

In a bar/pub/club never spoke to other people and had a blast? That has got me through very dull occasions.

Kind of like this place but only in RL.

I don't think it makes any difference really, whether you planned to or bumped into them by chance. The result was the same. You caught up with friends whilst maintaining 2m distance. Non issue

That was exactly my point, it makes no difference! There are so many silly and contradictory rules. I'm pretty good at lockdown, really, but I don't think you're doing anything wrong OP. As you said, 2m from strangers? Fine; 2m from family? Hell no!
It's bonkers.

I'm going for a socially distanced swim at my parents' house at the weekend. We'll go in through the side gate and straight in the pool. Have a swim in a giant vat of diluted disinfectant, have a chat etc and then go. If any child needs the loo we will take them to the outdoor/annex loo, and I will then clean round with antibac before we leave.

Sounds lovely IF I hope you and the kids have a blast

It also sets an example to other people. It will be very clear that this group is not one family living in one house, by the number of adults and children.
So other people will see it as 'okay'. And do the same but worse.

I think this is the difficult thing about the situation.

It's very hard to go to the local park with just my children and for them to see some of their friends from school playing together, and extended families out playing games etc, when we are trying to stick fairly closely to the rules.

It also sets an example to other people. It will be very clear that this group is not one family living in one house, by the number of adults and children.
So other people will see it as 'okay'. And do the same but worse.

How would it be obvious they are from a different home?
There are homes around the country with 3 generations at least living there.

Hi OP, this would annoy me too. I would also cancel last min as I would be so annoyed. I would also ask her why she couldn't sort food out originally? Money issues? Then why are you suggesting a picnic? The friendship seems strange tbh.

Agree you can't share food under 2 metre rules anyway.

I'd go without them and yes a definite CF!

OP - you are a CF - own it

You lost me at "feel slightly obliged".... it's a pandemic, you're not obliged to do anything.

All you had to do was say: I'm sorry but we're still self isolating as this is our choice as a family and will not be available until lockdown is over.

You're no to the request, not the person.

saying

Bring ALL the food - YANBU

Bring SOME food - YABU

These socially distanced - take the piss - meet ups are really annoying me!!! Sharing food etc! WTF?! Stay home ffs. Can’t people survive for a few weeks / months without meeting their friends? Let this virus rate settle down before you meet up with everyone. I am staying home and adhering to all rules. I am the only one?! 🤬