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AIBU?

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Original poster

To expect DH to replace the carpet he has destroyed

258 replies

Roostersmum2 · 21/05/2020 00:12

I say carpet, it's a large rug but covers most of the living room. I paid £200 for it as a treat to myself two years ago on my birthday as I spotted it and fell in love. It's a bit of a boring thing to buy on your birthday but hey.

I asked DH to give it a deep clean the other day and he reluctantly did. (Whole other thread). I went to bed only to get up and find him asleep on it the next morning having fallen asleep whilst playing the xbox.

He didn't air the carpet properly or open windows, instead he laid straight down on a wet carpet it to play his stupid game before falling asleep on it.

I've been smelling a "wet dog" odour all day and have discovered that it's the carpet which has developed mould/mildew due to not being aired properly and being smothered by him when wet.

He's not happy to be told he's now responsible for replacing it and thinks it was a good gesture of him to clean it in the first place...

Who's unreasonable?

OP posts:
JingsMahBucket · 21/05/2020 00:42

@spider she said they have damp in the front room where the carpet lives. It could definitely develop mildew overnight if it was wet and no air passing though it due to being on the floor.

StormBaby · 21/05/2020 00:42

It is not mould you can smell, it is damp. Very different thing. In time, yes the mould would grow. You can still save the rug. Air it out now until its dry, clean it again with a biological washing powder solution and air it again until dry. Then sprinkle bicarb all over it, leave for two days, then hoover off.

PastMyBestBeforeDate · 21/05/2020 00:46

He may well be a twat that you need to leave but why would you trust him with something that matters to you if he's that useless? You know he's an idiot and you're cross with him for being an idiot. Why do that to yourself?

NoMoreDickheads · 21/05/2020 00:46

It's just got a bit damp. I would put it in the garden or somewhere to air it.

Original poster
Roostersmum2 · 21/05/2020 00:48

I'm not high maintenance at all, I'm just sick of him doing nothing at home and everything falling to me. He spends most of his free time sat in front of a screen whilst I cook/clean/shop/take care of the children.

I can't crawl on the floor to clean it myself because of my medical issue and we can't get a rug doctor right now as I usually would.

The one time he actually helps in the home he does a half arsed job and can't even be bothered to take it to the next room to dry, instead he chooses to plonk himself down on it immediately so he can sit in front of the t.v. to game once again before falling asleep where he is.

I think most people would be upset about that no? It's like living with a oppositional teenager.

OP posts:
Original poster
Roostersmum2 · 21/05/2020 00:50

He may well be a twat that you need to leave but why would you trust him with something that matters to you if he's that useless

It needed to be cleaned because the baby sits/lays/plays on it and I couldn't get down to do it myself so there wasn't much option but to have him do it.

I've moved it myself to the other room and will do my best to salvage it tomorrow.

OP posts:
PuntoEBasta · 21/05/2020 00:54

Put it into the strong sunlight for as long as possible. It will work wonders.

TeddyBeans · 21/05/2020 00:54

OP I think you may have got a better reaction if you'd mentioned your medical issue to begin with. Your DH sounds like a prat and I'm sorry he's done a half arsed job after all this time. You've been given good advice on how HE can rectify the situation. Although if it takes him as long again I suspect he will be buying you a new rug. Get it out to air and see what happens, as PPs have said, it's unlikely to be mouldy just yet

PotholeParadise · 21/05/2020 00:55

It's not mould yet. I know a lot about mould, having rented a flat that turned out to have walls that were literally black with it.

It just doesn't develop that fast.

What does develop in any kind of fabric, from clothes left overnight in the washing machine to rugs, if they are left to dry very slowly without airflow, is a distinctive musty smell. That is what you have.

So what you have is a damp rug. It needs to be washed again, and put out to dry in the sun.

DianaT1969 · 21/05/2020 00:57

How long has been a gamer?

LivingThatLockdownLife · 21/05/2020 00:58

I'm confused.

Doing a regular wet clean of a rug.

  1. Why not just vacuum the rug?
  2. Why use water on the rug in a room which already has a damp problem? Makes me feel sick.

Then the OH.

  1. Why force him to do a wet clean of a rug when he's already proven he's a lazy bastard and can't be trusted?
  2. Why isn't he doing the other chores e.g. shopping, it's not hard just wait in the queue and then throw a list of shit in a trolley?
  3. Why isn't he spending time looking after his DC on his own while you get a break?

Honestly just so much weirdness in one thread.

Ultimately you don't have to accept being treated like a domestic slave. You might want to start a new thread on that.

Original poster
Roostersmum2 · 21/05/2020 01:00

Thank you, god I sound like a drip don't i. I promise I'm not. I'm just so bloody tired of the same crap.

It's reassuring to hear that it's not likely to be mould yet. Yes to the musty smell. It's like wet dog!

It has never happened before, probably because I take care when cleaning unlike him who did a rushed job and probably saturated it in water.

He said he had put the heating on to speed up the drying process but that didn't appear to be the case in the morning.

For those who haven't got the time to read the other thread, he did It late at night because he'd been putting it off for two days after promising to get it done.

OP posts:
Euclid · 21/05/2020 01:01

I must be out of date but what is this x box that so many unfortunate women complain that their "partners" spend their time playing with this thing?

Original poster
Roostersmum2 · 21/05/2020 01:03

I bought a carpet foam that you scrub into the carpet. It didn't need to be saturated in water.

It was never supposed to be left to air in the living room either.

Long story short he's just a lazy bastard who was given one job and couldn't be bothered to do it with care.

He has always enjoyed games but it has ramped up from infrequent use on weekends to every spare hour he has when not eating and sleeping.

OP posts:
PuntoEBasta · 21/05/2020 01:04

It’s a games console, @Euclid, which has been around in some form since 2001.

mathanxiety · 21/05/2020 01:04

Do you have a garden?

Take the rug out there if you do, spread it along the fence if you have one, and blast it with your garden hose.

Let it dry outdoors. Fresh air and sunshine will dry it properly and kill mould.

Unless your rug is absolutely filthy, it's not a danger to your baby. Babies don't need a spotlessly clean environment.

Lea

Euclid · 21/05/2020 01:09

Thanks Punto for explaining. Nobody in my social circle has this ghastly thing. Presumably it is for children and low brow adults.

WhatWouldYouDoWhatWouldJesusDo · 21/05/2020 01:11

That shouldn't cause mildew........I clean my carpets and obviously don't hang them up to dry. They don't go mouldy.

If it stinks it was probably already whiffy, cleaning it has probably just drawn out the smells. I wouldnt replace it, just get a professional to clean and neutralise it.

PuntoEBasta · 21/05/2020 01:14

There’s nothing fundamentally wrong with the console; like anything else it is the user who causes the problem. Literally millions of intelligent adults play video games in sensible moderation but you don’t read MN threads about them because they aren’t selfish tossers.

PotholeParadise · 21/05/2020 01:16

Probably too much water, yes. I am very cautious with indoor furnishings, because I have learnt the hard way that if you use too much water for it to dry quickly, you either have to wash it again or live with a musty smell.

It absolutely needs to be washed and aired out again, but it is not irreparably ruined. I can tell you a lot of tales of Belongings I Have Lost to Mould, but all of them would have been saved if I'd noticed and scrubbed them within 24 hours of them first getting damp.

PotholeParadise · 21/05/2020 01:20

Euclid

Thanks Punto for explaining. Nobody in my social circle has this ghastly thing. Presumably it is for children and low brow adults.

I have an Xbox, so low-brow adults sounds about right. Still, at least I can carry on using it in these difficult times. I don't think elevated folk like yourselves will be going to the theatre any time soon, will you?

StarUtopia · 21/05/2020 01:22

Seriously. Stop messing about and just get a carpet cleaning guy in to sort it.

The rug is not ruined.

Completel over reaction .

I kind of lose the plot reading the rest if I'm honest.

alwayscrashinginthesamecar1 · 21/05/2020 01:23

Euclid, are you,, perchance, a High Court judge? Grin

Bbang · 21/05/2020 01:35

I remember your other thread, sorry to be blunt but he is one useless twat. I appreciate it’s not easy but really try to think about your future and place some importance on yourself for once.

1forAll74 · 21/05/2020 01:38

Sounds like you lived in perfect harmony with your carpet, but not with your Husband.

You can get products to clean your carpet, you just don't throw them away..You can throw away a Husband any old time I suppose. !