Wouldn't you know its Mother's Day so of course MIL drama

[Leaannb]

Today my MIL called and decided that since our lockdown is ending on Tuesday it was time for her to make plans with my family. First she started in about my son's high school graduation which was originally planned for next weekend. It was cancelled a few weeks ago and they did a drive by graduation. Mil was informed of this by email by my son and myself. Of course we didn't get a reply. Needless to say she was upset that she missed it. Sorry for her but the island is closed until Tuesday so she couldn't attend anyway. She then stated she would be here next weekend to say goodbye to the same son because he was scheduled to leave for basic training next Monday. But due to Covid and early graduation he got offered the opportunity to leave earlier so he took it. He informed her once again by email and of course no reply. To be honest today is the first time we have heard from her since very early December when she got her knickers in a twist that we were going on vacation for the holidays. I don't understand that because we always go on vacation during Christmas holidays but anyway....Next thing on her agenda was wanting to visit around my DILs due date which was May 19th but she had her baby by c-section two weeks ago. Once again she was informed by email and no response.Obviously she is disappointed but what can I do. She then went on to say that she would be arriving on Island by Wednesday so she can meet the baby. I then told her that Son and DIl were following the advice of their OB/GYN not to introduce the baby for 12 weeks due to Covid and Kawasaki Disease and in fact has decided to keep all visitors away from baby until after the tourist season which is October. Which is completely understandable considering where we live,tourisim traffic and very iffy medical care at this time. She started to lose it but reined it in. Right until she asked me for photos of my granddaughter and my DIL's phome number. I politely informed her that I did not have permission from my son and Dil to share pictures and most definitely didn't have their permission to share phone numbers. I told her I would pass her number along to my son and dil and they would handle it as they see fit. Thats when she lost the plot freaked out and started yelling and screaming. I just sat down the phone and took my daughter to the beach for swimming and a picnic.....She definitely put a dark cloud on my Mother's Day

Except she doesn't have that power.
Her sons response would probably be "why? This woman isn't anything to me"

So essentially the MIL is kind of like a gypsy;she has no roots,no permanent home and pops up whenever it suits her with nobody having any idea when she's going to pop in their lives?

It sounds as though her email address is the only permanent thing about her tbh.It also sounds as though she has a strained relationship with her son and his family with her grandson and his wife not too keen on having her involved in their baby.

Nah. Son and wife are fine with her as Op said I know they sent a birth announcement with a pic through email.

Surely the polite response would have been "Tell you what, I'll get son to phone you tonight and to send you a couple of the best pics he has."

but the polite response was given, and i quote: I politely informed her that I did not have permission from my son and Dil to share pictures and most definitely didn't have their permission to share phone numbers. I told her I would pass her number along to my son and dil and they would handle it as they see fit.

I mean it's a bit stilted so maybe OP didn't say exactly that, but the gist of it is the same.

This sounds like it would make a good novel. You know - one of those ones where different parts are told by different characters. We have the Grandma, her DIL (the OP) and then OPs DIL. All telling the side of the story from different perspectives. It could then be made into a Made For TV Movie that would be on Channel 5 in the afternoon.

If she can't be arsed responding to the email she was sent re the baby details and picture....and she hasn't been arsed in all this time about getting their contact details or keeping in touch - then OP certainly doesn't owe her anything.

'Burner' is such a commonly used term for payg or disposable phones that there is an app called Burner you can download to a regular phone that allows you to create a temporary number for your own phone.

Saying something in a polite tone of voice doesn't make it the polite thing to say, Brefugee.

It's strange to be so cut and dried or legalistic when it comes to family relationships unless there is a lot of background which hasn't been revealed. If there isn't any issue with the great grandmother - personality, behaviour, habits, then this is all rather odd.