To think my Sister needs to get real

[jarhead123]

Video call with my Mum & sister on Saturday. Sister has very different life to me, works very hard in office job, as does her partner. No kids, plenty of money, big house etc.

We're doing OK, average house, 2 kids. (all just for background info!)

Anyway, during the call she says she thinks shops will be busy after 'all this' because everyone has so much money because we aren't going out/spending at the moment!

I was in shock. What about those people who have lost their jobs/are on furlough? She seems to think life is rosy because they have plenty of cash, but doesn't seem to realise a mile down the road we're all donating money to our school go fund me to help feed those vulnerable families etc.

Felt really irritated after the call!

She's right, and the economy will need people like her.

What are all the Dementors going to do with the sky doesn't fall and world keeps turning after this? YABU.

YABU for the simple fact that people judge by their own circumstances.

I actually have money for once as I'm still working and not spending £300 a month on my daughter's dance classes!

I'm working extra as well so not only have I been able to start paying my credit cards off but I've treated myself to a new pair of UGG OK slides and a pair of Ruby Shoos.... something I would never normally do!

I'm sorry people are struggling: I was one of those people for 20 years but no one bailed me out via Go Fund Me or anything else, I'm only just getting myself straight and as I've devoted my personal and working life to others for the last 23yrs I'm now only concerned with my own finances.

Find something else to be outraged about and leave your sister alone.

She's just a bit naive and doesn't realise I think. The fact is that in a blink of an eye things can change and everything can come crashing down. I don't think I've ever been complacent in relation to job security, but less than a month ago I would never have predicted that within a fortnight I would be furloughed with no job to go back to and my DH would have been placed at risk.

Shes right though - some people are saving money during all of this and will spend when shops reopen. It will be good for the economy. I know there are people who have lost their jobs etc but it sounds like she was just chatting and from her own experience, she will likely be out and about spending. I too think the same and have made similar comments, what's wrong with that?

It could probably go either way for a lot of people depending on their industry/luck. My husband and I are saving about £1400 per month between us on not having not commute, but he nearly got made redundant (some of his colleagues were).

Well replace "everyone" with "lots of people" and she will be right. Slightly annoying comment but not sure I would continue to be irritated by it (unless she has a history of this type of thing).

Like you said... different life. Let it go & hug your children a little tighter. I’m thankful now...

My husband is furloughed and with no going out, no fuel and no parking, is better off 🤷🏻‍♀️

It doesn’t sound like your sister is unaware of the fact there will be difference, it sounds like you’ve got a chip on your shoulder about the income difference and have been over sensitive.

It’s fine to say, “the shops will be busy, as people rush out to spend what they saved”. That might well be true. It doesn’t mean she thinks everyone has more money..

@jarhead123 - it's always so hard when people can't see their privilege and while she's right I can understand why it's so upsetting. So many are on the brink and so many won't survive financially.

Maybe next time share what you are worried about, or how you are giving and local children whose families can't afford food. May open her eyes.

She was a bit silly to say "everyone" and not "some people" or "a lot of people".

But you were also a bit silly to be "in shock" and not say anything, then seeth about it later.

Why didn't you just reply "come on sis, not everyone, how about all the people that have lost their jobs" and she probably would have said "oh yes, I misspoke there, silly me, I meant some people".

Also you may not have quite as much as her, but if you live in a normal house and have extra money to donate you clearly aren't doing too bad yourself, if you were very poor or just lost job etc it might have seemed a more insensitive thing to say.

I am hoping that a lot of spending occurs after lockdown, I can see what your sister is saying and hopefully it happens.

I'm currently still employed and am saving a bit extra.

However, with the potential for a worse, second wave, I think COVID is far from over.

If I'm still employed at the other end, I probably will make some major purchases, but we could be a long, long way for stability.

(And I'm posting from a country currently doing much better than the UK...)

I agree with you, but wouldn’t hold it against her. Lots of people live in a bubble. I am one of those people who have more money now and am looking forward to going clothes shopping again as it is one of my leisure pursuits in normal everyday life. But, I would never have made that comment as I know how lucky I am and am completely aware of how many people have gone from working to bring practically destitute and it is heartbreaking.

It's telling that so many people actually seem to want a dire recession and global instability.

Well, everyone has daft thoughts at times.

I had some yesterday.

I was thinking how everyone's electricity and gas bills must go sky high and a lot of people are staying in. Then there was a report on the news about less electricity etc being used . Obvs I hadn't thought about it like that. With not much/anything being manufactured, there is less being used. Duh!

We’re in that situation really although I’d never gloat or assume others were. Neither of us are being paid any less and we’re only using fuel to get to the supermarket down the road and back once every ten or so days. Obviously we’re also not going anywhere, not taking the DC anywhere but they are eating more food than usual.

We’re doing better financially than we have for a long time tbh. Doesn’t mean we’ll splash it all as soon as everything reopens though.

I had thought there might be pent up demand but with the economic signs the way they are, I reckon more people will choose to sit on some savings if they can because of what may be round the corner.

We don’t know if this lock down is the last one we’ll have either.

For some people what she said is correct. DH WFH on full pay, no coffee breaks and lunches for him, no commute etc. We're sticking to our one takeaway per week but obviously no eating out as we usually would every weekend. We're therefore saving money. After this is over (in a long time I think) we will return to eating out, going round the shops etc. Your sister is ignorant though, does she not watch the news.

We are all in the same storm but not all in the same boat.
While we are saving money in comparison to before, I am very aware of how more people are using food banks and applying for Universal Credit.