To have told my SIL to fuck off?

[Ablemaybel]

A little background.
There was a major falling out between myself, DH with his parents and two sisters some years back. It happened after our DD was involved in a road accident. We are still in touch with DHs brother and his uncle on mums side.
After several months DH resumed contact with them, and visited regularly taking both of our 2 DC.
I was never invited back, (both SI live with their parents, one being divorced, the other never moving out) which has never really bothered me. They both said some really nasty things to me, and about me at the time.

Fast forward years and I'm still answering our land line to hear either one of my SILs say is DH there? I have repeatedly asked DH to ask them to call him on his mobile, and after what seemed forever he told me he had told them. We've had no contact for years, there was never any apology, and I was just fed up being their switch board.
A few days later they called the home phone again, before handing him the phone, I asked him again if from now on could they please call his mobile.
A few days later I pick up to, is DH there?
I was really fed up and without much thought answered oh fuck off, and hung up.

DH thinks I behaved unreasonably, and I think most of you may also think that. I'm just interested to see what people unrelated to this think.

If you know your DH is in contact with them and takes your DCs to see them, I don't see the problem in them calling the landline.It seems an oddly petty distinction to make. And if situations were reversed, there's no way I'd let my DH tell me that my siblings couldn't call my house phone.
If this is really about the fact you're unhappy he resumed contact then have that conversation.

Just get caller ID and don't answer the phone.

Going forward, if you can't block their number, have caller ID or remove the landline entirely then I would just refuse to answer it at all.
If he wants to talk to them on the landline, then he has to answer it.

There is absolutely no reason I can see that you should be made to act as housekeeper and take his calls for him - so he gets to answer the landline 100% of the time. See how HE likes it when the call is for you!

If they are anything like my sister in law you are definitely NOT being U! Good on yer!

Well done op! YANBU. Now block the number.

You are giving them ammunition...
Dont lower yourself to their level.
Either block the number or, don't answer or always answer query with 'no, bye'....

YANBU

Don’t answer it. Who calls landlines now anyway? If you’re curious call 1471

Yanbu and well done for doing it.

From now I. I'd just put the phone down without saying a word

Yeah, they were being passive aggressive. Get an answerphone.

Ok, you did it once. You made your point. From now on you can simply hang up the phone as soon as you hear their voice. Or better yet, just stop answering it.

We disconnected our landline once we realized that it was all robo-calls or people we didn't want to talk to anyway. Is there a reason you keep your landline? Or more to the point, is there a reason that you have to be the one to answer it?

Why are some people so surprised that the OP has a landline? It's not that unusual surely? We have to have one for our internet but even without that many older people prefer to call on them. My mum for one. I'm sure she's not the only one.

"Yes, he's available on his mobile." Then hang up. Sounds like they are doing it deliberately.

Alternatively block their numbers on the landline.

I do this to DH's dad when he calls (long history of child abuse and don't want him ringing my house). He soon got the message and stopped calling the landline.

Not unreasonable at all.

If they do it again, when they ask if he's there just say yes and hang up. If they don't achieve what they want by calling it then they'll stop.

Do they usually want a conversation with your OH when he speaks to them? Am wondering if they're genuinely calling to chat or just wind you up.

I suppose it depends on what they said to you initially when you all fell out and how unreasonable they were at the time. My ex MIL who was really rude to me on one occasions (basically spouting the same shit ex abusive H said which he'd been filling her head with for years) but I still passed the phone over to H when she called. I didn't chat or engage, even though she tried. Life's too short to be over sensitive and bear grudges for years after imo.

If it makes you feel better then do it, but I personally think it's a bit childish .

YANBU Did it work?

Amazing .. yanbu!

I would love to tell my SIL to fuck off.

Sorry not helpful.

You need to have a strong word with your DH.

Wow.
How bloody rude!
I get you fell out. I get you feel aggrieved.
But to answer the phone saying "Oh fuck off" and then to hang up is really bloody rude. They're polite and simply ask to speak to him. That's not unreasonable.
YOU want them to ring the mobile, but your oh isn't bothered other than your harping on about it!
YOU have an issue. Get over it.
I am shocked that so many people disagree that you're so dammed rude.

Could you ignore the phone and let your husband answer?

It isn’t clear what was said. It sounds as though they were horrible, right? You could block her. Hang up, call 1572 and follow the instructions.

Do you not have caller id?

I wouldn't have wanted them to know I still gave them headspace so no I wouldn't have told her to fuck off.

Why is it ok for a woman to be controlling but not a man? Fair enough if you dont wish to answer the phone but you dont get to say who can call your landline. Hes an adult fgs!

Suppose as pp have said depends what the falling out was! The refusing to talk to each other seems to be mutual perhaps since you say you're not being invited back to their home? As usual if this was a reverse a op was saying my DH won't allow my family to call me on the landline, but he's happy with me taking the DC to visit, people would be like eh?!