To starve my toddler

[TiredMama90]

My son is 3. He’s been a fussy eater since the beginning. I’m a single mum (not by choice). Admittedly some days, for an easy life, I’ve given him what he chooses.

It’s his 3rd day of not eating a decent meal and only wanting crap.

Shall I just refuse him the foods he wants (crisps, chocolate & the like) until he gives in and eats proper food.

How long until he will give in??

You could stop buying crisps and chocolate?

If they're not there, he'll soon learn he can't have them.

What are the healthy-ish foods he likes?

He will eventually give in but toddlers have a will of iron so you might well break first! If you don’t have crap in the house then he can’t eat it and you can’t be tempted to give it to him. Just keep offering him healthy meals (a small bit of whatever you’re eating so you’re not wasting time making food that won’t be eaten) and water.

What do you class as a decent meal? What does he eat on the average day?
Does he have multivitamin?

I understand how stressful it is. There's a recent thread running on picky eaters which is helpful, I will try and link, but I think it's running in parenting.

Grapes are the only healthy food he likes. But if he eats too much fruit or veg, he gets diarrhoea.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3887099-3-year-old-won-t-eat-proper-meals?msgid=95843314#95843314

Is he just 3 or nearly 4?
I ask because my just turned 4 year old understands when I tell him they didn't have something in the shop because of the 'bad germ'

He usually drinks a ton but today hasn’t bothered with more than 200ml.

I’ve just removed all the crisps and biscuits from my house. His dinner is on the table but he’s refusing to eat it.

That’s ok. Missing a meal or two won’t hurt him.

Sadly JUST 3 & very behind with his understanding & communication. He may as well be just turned 2.

Give it a week, he will be addicted to the sugar and salt and craving it.

Be strong 💪

Are you sure he doesn't like scrambled eggs?

My middle DS went through a phase of only wanting super noodles, so I started chopping up chicken breast into tiny bits and sneaked them in.

Then eventually he'd have random things on the side like one slice of cucumber and a cube of cheese

If he won’t eat it and you’re sure there are no underlying sensory and health problems then just leave It and let him crack on. He’s digging his heels in because he knows he will get crisps and chocolate. Just say no and he won’t starve himself to death.

He used to eat a range of healthy snacks at school. Then stopped because he knew he only had to go hungry until I fed him the crap he was desperate for.

My DC have these multivitamins: www.boots.com/haliborange-3-12-years-multivitamins-everyday-health-30-strawberry-flavour-softies-10092975 They look and taste like sweets so your DS would probably like them.

I agree with the others. Just be strong, he won't waste away over night.
You're doing the right thing.

He’s got a very weak stomach and can throw up at the smallest of things.

He has most likely got sensory issues but it’s not been dealt with as we’ve been waiting on an assessment since April 2019.

Nothing wrong with giving him what he wants within reason. I never got why people are obsessed with my son eating roast dinners, so what they he doesn't like roast veg, potatoes and meat. Fish fingers, pasta, fruit and cucumber probably healthier anyway. Jam sandwiches are a hit too. I wouldn't worry too much but not would I buy chocolate. Mine like soreen bars they're not too bad.

He’s that fussy, he won’t take them so I’ve had to get him the liquid for babies.

He's not that behind them 😉

It will take time, get him a bit more involved if you can.

Try not to stress or be anxious. Make your self a meal, sit at the table and offer him to eat things that are on your plate.

Do it - you're doing him no favours by giving him crap to eat. I know it's hard, but you're responsible for setting him up for a long and healthy life. Giving him nothing healthy but grapes is very poor.

Have you tried things like:

Sweet potato
Veg fries (you can get these from supermarket frozen sections, it's carrot, parsnip and beetroot made into "chips")
Sauce with hidden veg
Smoothie ice lollies
Smoothie melts (freeze-dried fruit, in the baby section)
Ella's fruit pouches?

His diet has got worse and worse and stupidly I just allowed it. Then this Coronavirus happened and I kept excusing it “oh well, at least we are alive, I can work on his diet another time”.

My dc used to watch Big Cook Little Cook.
Bet it's on youtube!!
Great for encouraging cooking and eating imo!!

Don't be hard on yourself. Toddlers could break anyone! I would stop buying junk food, and if your child doesn't see it in the cupboard then he cannot demand it. If he refuses his meal, leave it on the table and let him watch you eat your meal. You could make meal time fun with special toys permitted to join in. If he gets hungry then he will eat eventually, and if he sees you eating healthy food then you are being a good role model for his future diet. Once his will is broken, I bet you will find a huge improvement in sleeping and behaviour generally. Sugar and additives really affect young children, making a rod for your back having to deal with it. While I appreciate lockdown is around, if you take him out in the afternoon for a run around somewhere quiet then you may stimulate his appetite by the time you get home for tea.

He eats that because you give it him.

Ice lollies made from yogurt and blended fruit work well with my fussy 3 year old, he'll refuse it separately but if it's frozen it must be a treat (toddler logic).

He also sometimes has a 'feast plate' for tea, it basically a assortment of the healthier snacks he will eat, put next to each other. For us that's cucumber, carrot sticks, blocks of cheese, torn up ham, nuts and cheese crackers. Not really a meal, but balance enough and more nutritious then a proper meal that doesn't get eaten.