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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to go and give this absolute idiot a piece of my mind?

369 replies

WobblyWoman · 21/04/2020 22:47

DH (keyworker) often takes the DC out for walks in the dark after work. DC prefer going with him than me as he plays games with them as they’re walking like hide and seek, skipping/jumping around, chasing, making animal noises etc, and they like going out in the dark just as backgroundGrin.

Anyway tonight they were walking down the main road and turned into a side road to cut back across to our house. Teen DS was walking ahead and didn’t notice they were going into the side road so carried on walking. DH bird called Hmm to him to get his attention and he walked back so DH and little DS decided to hide behind some bushes at the bottom of a small cul de sac round the corner so they could jump out at him. They were on the opposite side of some houses in the cul de sac and nowhere near gardens etc. Anyway within seconds a man threw open his front door of the house in front of them and shouted at DH and DS to ‘get out of it’ and get off his property or he’d set his dog on them! Cue massive ugly staffie like thing coming out of the front door towards them. DH explained what he was doing and said they weren’t on his property but the man kept on. DS was very scared and shaken by this point and worried about the dog so DH decided to just let it go as DC were there and came home with a very upset DS.

I’m absolutely furious that this man thought he could behave this way and want to knock on his door tomorrow and give him a piece of my mind about him threatening people with his dog. It’s only the next street up. There’s are lots of these little cul de sacs in our area, we live in one ourselves, and they are not the homeowner’s private property to dictate who stands near them!

AIBU?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Smilebehappy123 · 22/04/2020 01:08

@Thisismytimetoshine
Just be nice you bunch of cunts GrinGrinGrinGrin

SquirtleSquad · 22/04/2020 01:08

I can't take the irony, we can read.. can you read all of the comments on this thread telling you how unreasonable your family have been / are being?

@Thisismytimetoshine Grin there are no words Grin

WaxOnFeckOff · 22/04/2020 01:09

The man has nothing to apologise for.

BeNiceYouCunts · 22/04/2020 01:11

Had to bag this username Grin

Smilebehappy123 · 22/04/2020 01:12

@BeNiceYouCunts
Love the username I want it Grin

Nursejackie1 · 22/04/2020 01:12

So if he wasn’t in the mans garden I don’t see the problem. Your DH and kids are allowed to enjoy their walk as they see fit! I can’t see how a family having a laugh as you described can be interpreted as such danger that a dog needs setting loose on them. Especially after he woke to your DH. I seem to be in the minority but for Gods sake the bloke needs to get a grip.
Not sure what going round achieves with people like this, will probably end in another argument and dog threats.
It’s shit but sometimes you just have to accept people are arses.
Sorry your kids got scared by this unnecessary drama though.

NoSquirrels · 22/04/2020 01:12

the man still kept shouting and threatening them with his dog

Man was either A) an aggressive arsehole with a dangerous dog, full stop. Or B) a bloke who reacts to danger with a display of aggression (fight, not flight).

Your DH was in the wrong.
The aggressive bloke could have been less aggressive.

Thinking it is anything but 50/50 makes you seem aggressive yourself.

Explain to small DS it was unfortunate. Hope DH stops hiding in bushes after dark (especially in times like these of national stress). DON'T PUT A FUCKING NOTE THROUGH THE DOOR.

user1473878824 · 22/04/2020 01:12

For fuck’s sake just leave it. The guy was a bit of a dick but you’re being completely mental. You’re going round tomorrow to put a note through the door saying WHAT to get WHAT from it? “My DH is a VERY IMPORTANT key worker and your dog is ugly.” Cool. And he’s meant to do what?

Herja · 22/04/2020 01:14

Your DS being there is no indication that there was no criminal intent by the way. I was taken on innumerable dodgy trips as a young child. Why would he assume you were AOK because there was a child there? Your DH could have been hiding from a kid like he said, or he could have been hiding, waiting to sell some crack, or rob someone, like my mum was with me...

Catsup · 22/04/2020 01:15

No need for a note OP just pop your diagram through his letter box to clearly explain it all - you just need to add a big red arrow pointing to your DH and identify him as VERY important keyworker Grin

Halo1234 · 22/04/2020 01:21

A dad and children having a bit of a carry on doesn't not warrant the threat of being attacked by a vicious dog. That is intimidation and totally over the top. It warrants a curtain twitch and watch on them at best. I can see why you are annoyed op. I am surprised I am in the minority. Its not ok the use your dog as a weapon. Or threaten to.
Having said that u dont know his past or what he was thinking. It could have being coming from a place of fear. I would prob let it go.

WyfOfBathe · 22/04/2020 01:23

You asked if you're been unreasonable. 86% think you are. You still think the right way forward is to put a note through his door calling him a cunt? Why bother asking?

TKAAHUARTG · 22/04/2020 01:34

Maybe he had kids that were scared, shaken and upset from an absolute idiot hiding in the bushes at night. It is fucking odd behaviour OP.

Whattheother2catsprefer · 22/04/2020 01:38

I'm not a key worker, let alone a very important one so I can work from home. That means during the day I'm working from home (and looking after the DC and trying to ensure that they do some school work). Does this mean I get a free pass to go and hide in the bushes several streets away, while making animal noises and generally terrifying the local residents?

DioneTheDiabolist · 22/04/2020 01:38

Thank you for the helpful diagram OP.Flowers I will pop a note through idiot guys door but certainly not to apologise on DH’s behalf, but to tell him he’s a ct! Excellent idea.Grin

NaNaNaNaNaNaBaNaNa · 22/04/2020 01:47

As others have said, your husband and kids were being a bit silly and might have scared him. Completely understand why he shouted at them and asked them to leave (even though legally it seems they were technically allowed to be where they were).

Threatening children with a dog when you can see they are scared is not on though. I'm pretty sure that if your dog's behaviour makes someone afraid that they might be attacked then you can be prosecuted for it, but the police almost certainly have bigger things on their mind right now.

Personally I'd let it go and tell my husband to stop scaring the neighbors, but I fully understand why you're upset; you're protective of your family and don't like your kids being threatened. That's a normal reaction.

CeriseClementine · 22/04/2020 01:53

If I looked outside and saw a man hiding in the bushes in the dark, possibly about to jump someone, I’d have made one hell of a racket too.

You are very obviously being unreasonable op.

LilacTree1 · 22/04/2020 01:55

Idiotic, hiding around people’s property at night. Don’t blame the guy.

sashh · 22/04/2020 06:07

Yabu for calling a staffy ugly.

It was the 'massive' that got me.

So tempted to start another thread.

OMG there were some men hiding in the bushes outside and signalling with bird whistles. I've checked my property for a red dot, none to be seen.

Anyway dh threatened them with the dog, who might lick them to death as he is really soppy and the oldest one said he was a key worker taking his children to the park!

AIBU to log this with 101?

Do you think they will come back? I'm worried they will steal the dog.

Aridane · 22/04/2020 06:11

The man should have apologised when he realised what they were doing and it wasn’t a threat to him or his property.

No , DH and poorly behaved noisy son should apologise

I don’t have a dog but fish wife’s style exclamations would have been heard or a bucket of water to flush out the bush hider person

thecatsarecrazy · 22/04/2020 06:14

People are short tempered. Early on with all this I was walking with my boys and youngest, age 3. Ran up to someone's front door before I could grab him quick enough, tapped on the letter box and started the dog off. They shouted at me " what you knock on the door for!" A couple of days before someone had left a car key on their door step. Eldest alerted them and got a thanks. No good deed and all that

Gruffawoah · 22/04/2020 06:15

It still makes no difference that he is a key worker. It's weird that they were hiding in a bush and presumably making noise for him to have heard at night. He shouldn't have threatened to set the dog (no one ever should), but it all sounds a bit pathetic really. No, I wouldn't go around to his house.

Aridane · 22/04/2020 06:17

The relevance of him being a key worker is that he is a fucking Saint 😇 and man with dog is pond filth

supercee · 22/04/2020 06:26

I've never seen a 'massive' staffie Hmm

Ulver · 22/04/2020 06:29

Maybe the man with the dog saw a man with a child acting suspiciously.
If they were me I would be concerned for the safety of the child.
I would have no way of knowing he was their father as he was about to jump out at them from some bushes in the dark which is not normal?
You are being very unreasonable to expect your neighbours to put up with this.