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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbours and my WIFI

697 replies

Imrubbishatuserables · 19/04/2020 21:15

Hey!
Straight to point I got a new neighbour in my block of flat a few months ago and she asked for my wifi password to connect her console to so they could watch netflix.. i thought why not.. one other thing connected to it wont harm and she has just moved in.. it's her first home she hasn't had chance to set up her own yet. She then gets a new tv in the last few weeks and connects to my wifi but she has also connected her phone and her mates phone to it as well as they are picking up our google speakers on the network her mate joked they should play songs through my sons one in his room from their phones. So I have no idea how to change the password but would I be unreasonable to turn it off every night at 8PM? Considering we are in lockdown and she cant get her own during this time as they will need to come and connect it up. Previous tenant in that flat never had wifi either.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
k1233 · 25/04/2020 23:55

I agree with the plausible excuses

Message back I've had to change the password on mine because:

  1. Work insists on a secure network, so I had to change the passwords OR
  2. Bank account issue so had to change the passwords

If she comes back and says you knew she was still using it due to the speaker comment the other weekend, be surprised and say "oh, sorry. I thought you were just having a sneaky peek at our network when you were bored. I'd assumed you'd arranged your own by now. You'd reminded me I'd shared my password with a few people and given the advice from work / bank and security issues, I had to change it. This is my provider, they should be able to help if you give them a call"

No bitchiness or spitefulness, just non negotiable can't share the password.

Justus77 · 26/04/2020 04:46

I’m over invested in this... mummy2017... wtf???

OP you asked for advice you got it. I think the general consensus is say something that invites no further discussion and then stick to the “no is a sentence” mantra.

And update us all!

slashlover · 26/04/2020 05:39

According to the thread.
Can I use your internet for Netflix 4 months ago.
And last week ish when there was mention of using DS's speaker to broadcast into his room is multiple conversations.
OP has said she does not want to confront them.

According to you, this means the neighbour should automatically know OP is unhappy. If the OP has never made any issue of it despite being completely aware then how is neighbour supposed to know this?

With last weeks conversation, HOW is OP meant to say did you not sign up, and that sorry but she can't now due to safety issues? without neighbour asking why she never said before/did OP forget the conversation from last week/thinking OP is passive aggressive?

You keep saying this is non-confrontational. Neighbour has messaged and knocked several times, it is merely delaying the discussion and increasing the neighbour's frustration. You're acting as if neighbour is suddenly going to realise, they're not. A quick "I realised that it really wasn't safe to share, sorry." is less confrontational than "mine is fine", neighbour then asking if OP thinks there is something wrong and OP having to tell the truth anyway.

chardonm · 26/04/2020 06:22

Agree "mine is fine" won't work

mummmy2017 · 26/04/2020 06:38

Mine is fine. Would have worked if sent the day or next day after being asked by neighbour because theirs was not working.
100% certain the neighbour now knows she has no internet.
OP is now expecting a knock on the door.
All games are now off.
Let's just see what OP decides to do.

MamaFrey29 · 26/04/2020 06:42

I need an update!! Grin

Weregoingonanadventure · 26/04/2020 08:05

@mummmy2017

See when my 8 year old is writing his sentences and I say "oh, this one doesnt really make sense because these things dont work together. Can you think of a different phrase?", he will go away and re-write his sentence so it does make sense.

The OP has said that as the weeks have gone on, the neighbour has connected new devices to the wifi, so she has known the whole time and had never told the neighbiur she is. The neighbour knows that she knows. Pretending that she didnt isnt going to work. Playing dumb will make her like just about as stupid as you do right now.

You are wrong.

Weregoingonanadventure · 26/04/2020 08:07

*told the neighbour she is unhappy

Yester · 26/04/2020 08:11

And ....

Weregoingonanadventure · 26/04/2020 08:13

The neighbour obvisouly knows she has no internet! That's the problem. She wants to know WHY. It's really quite clear that she wont stop asking. You're acting like the woman will just stop or forget about it. She wont.
Saying mine is fine does not answer her question, and will make her look at the text and think "what the fuck is this woman talking about. She knows o use it. She never had a problem with it. Why cant I get on". She will then keep texting and asking or wait to catch her in the hall.

It isnt non-confrontational. Its batshit because it makes no sense given the facts in this situation.

Now, first you said this phrase would force the nieghbour to admit her usage. She doesnt need to admit anything. Then you changed it to say it would help her save face; she doesnt need to save face. Then you changed your reason to say it would stop the OP grovelling; absolutely no suggestions have the OP grovelling and now you're saying it is to avoid confrontation, but you admit yourself that if the neighbour replies (which she 100%) then the OP will end up needing to send the "I've changed the password" text anyway, so it doesnt avoid anything. It delays it, causes more frustration, looks passive aggressive and stupid

You're tiring yourself up in knots to make your ides work when it makes no fucking sense. But I'm sure you'll just come up with a new reason, like you've done each time.

FredAstaireAteMyHamSandwich · 26/04/2020 08:42

Cheeky mare!

thejollygargler · 26/04/2020 08:58

FFS - why is everyone picking this apart like an episode of Silent Witness.

The OP didn;t want the neighbour to continue to use her internet connection and has changed the password.

She either tells the neighbour this or gives the neighbour the new password.

mummmy2017 · 26/04/2020 09:32

Pages 19 onwards 15 people agree with me.
Anyone cares about my wording is trying to put me down , in a desperate need to be right.
Grow up.
Biscuit

slashlover · 26/04/2020 09:45

You're correct, from page 19 people did agree...right up until OPs post on page 22

Imrubbishatuserables Fri 24-Apr-20 17:57:31
yeah it was mentioned last weekend about the speaker coming up on the network.. so I knew which made me start the thread to begin with.

Then people realised that OP couldn't play dumb about the neighbours usage because OP knew and had discussed it with neighbour.

"Oh were you still using my wifi?"
"Yes...we were talking about it last week. Remember?"

"Mine's fine."
"Oh. I wonder why mine has suddenly stopped working, could you maybe reset the router to see if that helps?"

Aweebawbee · 26/04/2020 09:49

You must have a much better internet service than me. With 4 adults trying to work/study from home, our connection can be glitchy. If DH wants to do an important webinar or conference call, he goes round the house telling everyone to get off the line. Of course, DCs don't comply and the internet wars kick off (again).

Couldn't you just say that your connection was playing up, so you have to block other users?

Alternatively, needing a secure network for work is good.

Qgardens · 26/04/2020 10:10

There are some really good suggestions later on after we later realised "mine's fine" won't work. Which one of the latter suggestions have you used?

JimDuggansEye · 26/04/2020 11:14

Up until then hundreds of people were telling her to change the fucking password, days after she had done so, so having people agree with a stupid idea isn't proof that it isn't a stupid idea. It just proves there are other stupid people on the thread.

OldEvilOwl · 26/04/2020 11:31

Wow! Just text her one of the suggestions on here then it's over and done with. I can't believe this is still going on 😂

Scarlettlmc · 27/04/2020 07:34

Change the password and don't feel bad about doing so. It's very nice of you but not your responsibility and they are taking the piss. They can tether their devices to their phones hotspot or purchase a dongle online very easily. I also think it's possible for them to get WiFi activated even during this - many companies will send out the WiFi router which you can connect yourself

JimDuggansEye · 27/04/2020 07:41

Oh, for fucks sake!

MontysOarlock · 27/04/2020 07:45

@Aweebawbee Dh is in IT so I don't deal with any of this but he has a list of which device is which on our router so he can cut the children off from the router if needed.

I think it was to do with giving them fixed IP addresses and he can also set the hours they can be on the internet too.

If anyone needs to do this call your provider and they can talk you through it or google your router details.

Atleastthedoglovesme · 27/04/2020 07:49

I cannot believe you haven't sorted this out and drawn a line under it already.

'Hi neighbour, I'm sorry I've had to change WiFi password as I was advised (by work) for security reasons not to let anyone else use my WiFi. Hope you manage to get your own WiFi sorted soon. All the best Imrubbish '

Honestly you've allowed this to drag on far too long...and now she's knocking on your door at inconvenient times....I couldn't be arsed with all this.

Longwhiskers14 · 27/04/2020 08:09

Jesus, will people RTFT??? OP changed her password pages ago!

Queenoftheashes · 27/04/2020 08:38

Wtf did I just read 😂 I was meant to get up 50 mins ago

JudyCoolibar · 27/04/2020 09:01

I cannot believe you haven't sorted this out and drawn a line under it already.

@Atleastthedoglovesme, I cannot believe that you have not read the thread before posting something that is now utterly irrelevant.