To find it rude that people just don’t acknowledge texts?

[Ladyks]

Basically that. Been trying to organize something (don’t want to say in case it’s outing) and have been messaging a lot of friends and some just flat out don’t respond? If you don’t want to participate, then fine, but why ignore the message full stop? It’s WhatsApp so I know these “friends” have read it. Some initially responded, and when I sent a reminder message (one reminder as they hadn’t participated yet, & the day before I needed it— & they knew about it for over a week from the original message), they just ignored it? I’m just frustrated & find it incredibly annoying, and no, it’s nothing that asked for money or anything complicated. Also seems to be my British friends more so than my American friends that just don’t ever respond. Is it cultural perhaps?? Just having a rant really, it’s hard to organize things. Thanks for making it this far.

Can’t phone them as my husband is working from home. We have a baby so also I don’t have time to make multiple phone calls. To be fair most responded, but the few that didn’t, that clearly know I can see they read the message... I find that odd.

Because if it's not a video message (cringe) then they probably think you've lost the plot and they'll just text him on the day themselves as normal.

They've got a choice between seeming rude at worst and forgetful at best by ignoring you or seeming rude at best and a shit friend at worst by saying "no I don't want to"

I know the feeling lady

I often don't answer my phone if I don't feel like it. I pay for my phone for my own convenience not anyone else's.

As for texts - so many people nowadays won't take no for an answer it's easier to just ignore them if not interested. If I could have a phone without a texting function I'd be quite happy.

Oh god- that request would make me cringe so much. I’d be ignoring that message too and texting my friend directly on his birthday without having to go through his wife days in advance.

@Ladyks So you are upset that your demands for a birthday message were ignored? I just can't even....Its ridiculous texts like that is the reason why I only answer most texts at night before bed if I remember. These people are grown they don't need for you to manage their relationship with your husband

Under normal circumstances I’d agree it was rude but the current situation is seriously tough for a lot of people and many will be struggling with MH, family problems, financial worries, etc. I’d be inclined to cut people some slack.

No, I’m mad that they responded “yes” and then didn’t send one & then ignored my one reminder. Why bother responding at all in the first place if you’re then going to ignore it? & yea gasp must be nice not having a milestone birthday while in lockdown with no one to celebrate with you. Sorry for wanting to do something nice for him.

@Ladyks Maybe they think you are the odd one for deciding how they are to handle your husband's birthday? That's really rude

Why on earth should someone HAVE to answer their phone if they don't want to??!!

I find it rude. Over time I've not bothered with people like that. It takes a minute to reply.

Maybe they don't like being ordered to send birthday wishes before his actual birthday ?

I would find that message a bit weird , a bit demanding , a bit needy and bloody annoying , not something I would want my partner to do for me or me do for him , my partner had his birthday in lockdown last weekend and his friends and family phoned or text or sent cards without my intervention , but perhaps you are different

Some people are currently overwhelmed with stuff.

Maybe the impossible combination of wfh and looking after kids; maybe the worry about vulnerable family members; maybe circumstances related to their employment and financial sustainability.

Maybe they are in decision overwhelm. They see your message but replying (in any form) is just too complicated.

It is definitely rude.

@Leaannb you’re very combative over text, maybe you don’t get invited to things often. Not sure where you’re getting that I “demanded” it. I sent a message explaining what I had planned- it’s a whole evening thing for him, not simply messaged from friends but that’s part of it. Most responded, some didn’t, and some did, and then ignored it later on. What can’t you grasp about that?

Basically it is saying - you are very very low on my priority list. Or maybe you are not even on my list at all. Sorry, no excuse except for death or illness. Very rude.

I'm guilty of this. I read a message, make a mental note to reply and then forget said mental note. Not trying to be rude though 🤷‍♀️

Again, not sure why people are assuming I ordered it? I explained my plans for the evening & asked if they’d be part of it. End of.

@starray thank you

It's just so fucking rude to not reply. I don't understand it at all. I get that sometimes you might be busy but some people do it all the time - until it's something that they want and then they're straight back with a reply. To be honest, I just don't bother any more with people who do this; I just chalk them up as shit people.

Also, I think it’s perfectly reasonable to organise birthday video messages for someone who’s either ill, a child, or, say, 100. For a (presumably) middle-aged man I’d be a bit when we’re all in the midst of a crisis. But then I’m a miserable fucker who doesn’t understand why any adult would expect anyone to give a shit about their birthday

It’s a milestone birthday we had talked about all year, or it would’ve been super low key anyway. Just disappointed for him & wanted to make the day nice.

To be honest I wouldn't respond to that either. I will wish someone happy birthday in my own way.

Oh dear OP - now I know what it was for I can see why people said (er......yes) and then thought about it further and decided (um.......no!)

It's so incredibly cringe I don't know where to begin - sorry!