To be annoyed about my neighbours complaining

[BuzzingtheBee]

About my children playing in the garden? And us playing music over the bank holiday weekend (not loud)? The children only play out when its nice weather so not that much, I’m happy they are outside and not stucknto ipads etc!

Kids playing in the garden - no problem providing they are not screaming all day.

Music in the garden - NO! I've had to endure this all weekend from my neighbour, which has prevented us from being in our own garden. We can hear it inside as well even with windows and doors closed.

Totally selfish behaviour. If you want to listen to music then stay indoors or get some bloody headphones.

I’m 30 and have a 3 year old. Regularly spend time in the garden with her, listening to music and playing.

I live in a mid terrace. Elderly woman on one side and older couple on the other. No complaints and we speak regularly, while we’re all in our gardens. Thank god they’re not as miserable as the lot of you on here!

You might enjoy your ‘peace in the garden’ but others enjoy the positive vibes music brings to them. Especially in these times! What gives your quiet garden precedence? It’s our space as much as it is yours?

Complain about the people out playing music in public spaces and not in the comfort of their own garden!

Its difficult isn't it?

All of my neighbours play their music. Nobody ever complains.

Kids playing on the other hand (laughing, giggling, talking normally, not screeching or ball bouncing etc) and you are considered a disgusting human specimen. Even though its for a maximum of 90 min a day.

We don't tend to play music, unless it is to drown out the bullies. We don't need to because somebody nearby always is, always generic.

Its about respect and reasonableness in my opinion. It goes both ways. Some love silence, some don't. A bit of both is OK surely?

@Sienna9522 well with that argument why does your need to play music trump their want for quiet?

Music gets on my bloody nerves
Noisy kids screaming, arguing and crying!! I opted for no kids to get some peace and quiet... Not to have my neighbours kids doing my head in

@BuzzingtheBee , why did you even ask, if you're so convinced you're right?

Children playing, within reason and at reasonable hours, not shrieking constantly is ok.

Playing music in your garden is absolutely not ok if the neighbours can hear it, which they clearly can.

This has kicked off locally on a Facebook page - amazingly there were several people who said that the person playing music could play as loud as they wanted if it helped them deal with the current stress. When people said what about people locally who are ill or sleeping nightshift workers they dismissed them as nobody local affected they had checked. When others said actually they were, they weren’t asked and they were affected, they were very dismissive and still said that kids made noises that stopped them from working from home so they didn’t care, they were going to play music.
It was notable that the people expecting to play music looked under 30 while those who said play your music but turn it down so I don’t have to listen from 5 streets away were over 30. Not exclusively but noticeable trends.

@Sparklesocks my music isn’t at rave level and I doubt the people agreeing that music in the garden is ok, is either. It’s about compromise! Low level music isn’t going to massively impact on a neighbours need for quietness.

The responses on here generally astound me, has no one ever had a BBQ and had some music playing or do you all have to write formal requests to the neighbours?

@Sienna9522 , truly glad I'm not your neighbour!

Haha, yet another "I am NOT unreasonable, you bastards" op. Why bother asking?

So glad I don't live around inconsiderate fuds who inflict their music on others.

I'm with most of the others; the sound of children playing out is fine (provided they're not screeching or swearing at each other) but music/TV noise in the garden feels more intrusive. My opinion may be because I live in a terraced house with a small garden and feel as though we have very little control over when to enjoy the outside space thanks to selfish neighbours who smoke skunk, play loud music with, sweary and violent lyrics and at times, lob snooker balls over the fence into our garden. All of those mean that our garden feels unsafe a lot of the time and I suppose the playing of music in gardens feels like an unnecessary imposition on others.

@Pomegranatemolasses likewise!

@Sienna9522 I think a party once in a blue moon is different to just playing music for yourself in the garden on a regular basis. If I want to listen to music on a sunny day I’ll just whack some head phones in when I sit outside.

I am really surprised to hear all these strong opinions about music in the garden. It's always been something that I thought everyone did at some point. I occasionally play music outside at a reasonable volume. This weekend music was coming from a couple of gardens locally. I don't find it annoying at all. I am glad people are having a good time on a sunny day. Music is much less annoying that children screaming and shouting.

YANBU on both counts. But as this is Mumsnet, you’ll be told you are a terrible neighbour and a horrible human being for daring to enjoy your garden, as you’re not supposed to do anything that could ever slightly inconvenience your neighbours in any way, including playing inoffensive music at a low level in your own garden 🙄 .

But sometimes it's all combined, music, kids screeching, dog barking and adults shouting, all from the same house , I never play music in the garden so no not something every one does .

@Sparklesocks I’m still working shifts, so music in the garden isn’t a daily occurrence, but regularly, probably yes. My days off I spend with my daughter and staying in all day isn’t an option. We enjoy the sunshine and at the moment the garden is pretty much the only place I can enjoy it with her. I enjoy music and wearing headphones with a young child, also isn’t an option.

I don’t blast my music and that’s probably why I’ve never had a complaint. Like I’ve said previously, it’s about compromise. I also don’t care when my neighbours play their music, I quite enjoy being a part of other people’s enjoyment. I genuinely don’t understand why people are so begrudging.

People playing music at a low level in their garden is a very inaccurate example of ‘anti social’ behaviour 🙄

@BuzzingtheBee you sound like a lovely neighbour! In my opinion most people would prefer to live next door to a nice, happy family. Think about the other options they could find themselves living next door to such as a spaced out junkie who sleeps all day, maybe even in his garden! Well at least they'd be quiet so that's all right then is it?

My neighbours on each side are always playing music in their gardens and they are just loud people so even when they talk it echoes around our house even when the doors/windows are closed.

I actually like their music but I don’t want to hear it all the time or put up with their shouting over the music either. Especially both sets of neighbours at the same time.

I want to hear the bird song and cherish the calmness.

Even worse when they have bbq’s and the air is polluted with the stench of roasting dead flesh takes over our (vegan) household as well as the noise.

They are oblivious to anyone else.

I need to buy a deserted island.

Children playing - fine. Music - not fine.

My view. If I wanted to hear your music choices I'd be playing them, if I'm not it's a clue that I don't want to.

Music in you garden is very antisocial.

What exactly was the form and riding of the complaint OP?

Hannah if you don't like the sound of children playing go and live where you have no neighbours. You choose to live in a community- we all need to come and go with each other. Ffs.