Do you wake sleeping teens or leave them be?

[ChandlerIsTheBestFriend]

Should they be up because it’s day time and everyone else is up or should they be left to suit themselves as there is literally nothing for them to do, nowhere for them to go and no-one to see?

YANBU= wake them
YABU= leave them be

I have this thought daily, have teens that some days have slept till 5pm. Most days it's 1/2pm , I struggle to let them go past 1. My eldest has some uni work but youngest nothing as GCSE year.
They are up till 3am every night ATM so maybe I should relax it, I get my morning.peace and they always miss breakfast and usually lunch!

My DS 15 is up at 6.30 every morning to let the puppy out and feed her (his dog that he begged for for years). He's in bed by 10.
DD 11 would sleep late if I let her, but that also means she goes to bed late, and I like some peace in the evenings!

I get.my peace in the morning! I'm slowly adapting to the stay up late sleep in late routine they have developed x

I am so happy and sad reading these replies!
How well I remember my mother going firstly passive aggressive and then full on apeshit at teenage me at 9am every weekend morning just because she had been up since 7 and I was apparently wasting my day. It was not a happy time. Thank you for letting your teens sleep!

Surely it depends if it's 'term time' or Easter holidays? In the holidays, I let them sleep. In term time, which starts again on Monday for us, they have to be up and dressed for registration at 9am. I think it's important to keep the school routine going - for all concerned.

Mine are both 14 and surface around 11.30. They drop off around 12.30-1 but I don't put any restrictions on bed time.

As a teen I could sleep in until 2/3pm and my parents let me be, so I am chilled if they get later as they get older (as I did).

In term time I wake them around 10-10.30. They're very good with their school work and I trust them to manage their time and workload.

As pp said, more sleep equals less eating.

We dont have a school routine as dd is year 11 and no school work , ds is uni and online lectures will begin again soon but they dont start till 1pm

DS 16 reckons he can't sleep. I am now unplugging the router and taking it to bed with me every night, but he can still sometimes stay awake all night, won't listen when I recommend things to help him sleep.

So I let him sleep until about 2 then start making things uncomfortable for him, to get him awake at least.

He has mental health issues, so I'm trying to not let him fall into bad patterns that would affect that. No schoolwork being done, he was likely to fail his exams anyway. Am giving him small diy projects to do and paying him for them to try to give him something to do in the daytime. Feels like I'm having to give him the routine that school and his social life would normally give him, its hard work!

In term time, which starts again on Monday for us, they have to be up and dressed for registration at 9am. I think it's important to keep the school routine going - for all concerned.

Registration? In the house?

I wake mine up at midday - a time agreed by him and us. Just so he doesnt get into a completely opposite schedule.

I'd wake them at 12. I remember getting into a topsy turvy sleeping pattern at uni and it badly affected my mental health. Asleep by 2am, awake by 12pm I would make the rules.

On Monday I will wake them again, but not during the holidays or weekend. They are getting a lot of school work and I want them to keep up.

I'm waking my 16 yr old about 10.30/11.00. He's normally semi awake anyway, so it's persuading him to get up and come down for breakfast rather than waking him from deep sleep, which would be mean. He's not thrilled by me turfing him out, but he's OK about it, and I think in the end he is happier if his bodyclock doesn't get too out of whack and if he still takes lunch, dinner etc with us. I've just started persuaded him to do some exercise outside first thing too as otherwise he was putting it off all day. Before the Easter holidays started I was waking him earlier. Will wait and see what school asks for next week. It's not entirely clear right now.

17 year old I leave to do her own thing. She normally gets up a bit earlier anyway (9.00/9.30?) and starts day with good breakfast, exercise. If she decides not to and to stay in bed then it is more than my life is worth to interfere!!!

I'm leaving mine be - DS with ASD is running to normal schedule, up 7.30am ish, bed 9-10pm ish, DD (NT) well she's become nocturnal - leaving her to it as she's doing all the school work, has tidied and painted her room and going to lay a new floor. She's also only been grumpy once in a month off.

I have 3 DC - 19,17&15
All have played competitive sports (4am early starts 5 days a week for 6/7 years) but when they get a break (holidays etc) they have always policed their own bedtimes and getting up times
My concern is they get a minimum amount of sleep, they interact with the family, have time to relax and to actually do nothing g if they so wish.
The first two weeks for them was a holiday - my 17 year old who used to sleep 18 hours a day works full time even in this strange time and they are all well adjusted, happy and social being (obviously mostly on their terms) and that’s all that matters x

I understand most teens would naturally want to go to bed late and get up late. And I would say I’ve taken more of a middle ground here. So obviously not getting them up early doors 7 am is usual) but by 9/930 am when I start work ( at my home office) I’ll start knocking on doors. I also leave them some chores because I think they need to help out as I’m working full time. I don’t see why they should lie in bed all day and I work all day and then have to finish and do all the clearing up/ dinner so they can learn to cook. Both expected to put hoover round and wash up clean toilets/sinks etc weekly and do bins etc We might be in unusual times but it’s a team effort hey! I make sure we all get exercise and constantly encourage them to get outdoors either on their own or if they haven’t worked out themselves then a dog walk at 5 pm with us. 15 now started a regular run. Daughter 13 doing home workout via phone app. They are having ALOT of screen time but I’ve bought new books for them and they are reading and doing other activities but I have to encourage this and it’s hard work. It’s easy to be completely lazy but I see this an opportunity to contribute aswell. I think it’s more mentally healthy for them to stick to a 9 am wake/ 10 pm bedtime so they don’t get into a really bad cycle. We will come out of this current situation and I am determined they will return to normal life as far as possible. I realise I’m probably going against the grain and I certainly don’t judge anyone or think it’s wrong to let kids sleep until midday. But Not all day and not gaming until 6 am! If I could have not picked either option I would have preferred that as really you do what’s right for your family.

Mine world not be pleased if I started banging on doors at 9am 🙄🙄

Busymum45 I don’t bang on the door- I just knock first and pop my head round and usually older one is sort of awake anyway. Younger one gets up on their own around 8 ish. Older one also has a paper round at weekends so up at 645! He does that himself - I don’t wake him.

Am i the only one who diesn't have a teen that sleeps so late?
DS (14 nearly 15) has always been an early riser, due to this he's usually asleep around 11pm but he is still up around 7am, 8 at the latest

My kids are 3, 5 and 7 so have all this to come. But, we are just emerging from the hideously early waking years. Where 5am was normal, even sometimes 4.30am. As their parent, I’m just beginning to recover from around 7 years of struggling through chronically terrible disrupted sleep. I hope I remember this when my DC are teens .

minionsule my 15 year old never slept in until the lockdown and school ended, now its every day.
Both are still asleep now, I am loving the peace !

Mine are still asleep. I'm enjoying the peace as the constant bickering is doing my head in.

My Mum wouldn't have let us lie in , (though she used to sleep till noon when we were at school, she didn't get up either for breakfast either)

We wouldn't be lazing in bed while we could be up cooking , tidyng or going to the shops for her though my DSis used to hide upstairs 'studying' and my DBro used to be allowed out to play .so it fell on me.

She used to come into the front room with the vacuum when Saturday SwapShop was on (the only kids TV on a Saturday) even though she had all bloody week to vacuum. And if we protested , put the sound up or tried to crane round her ..whap the TV went off .

So, I don;t wake my teens up, no . I know how annoying it was.

Very noisy outside during the day where I live - on a main road which is still busy all day, I'm guessing because most people have to go down it to get to big supermarkets! Despite this, I'd estimate DD is on a routine of 11am-7pm sleep at the moment. Just me and her, no jobs, and she doesn't have any school work due to the fact she was doing a practical course. She has 'breakfast' with me every morning still, and tea with me, so no missed out family time! I'm just letting her do her thing, she's much happier being awake when it's nice and quiet.

Dreading the return to getting up relatively early tomorrow. Didn't see my youngest until 11 and eldest has just emerged looking for food.