To get pregnant in this Covid 19 life ?

[LidiaM]

Me and my husband really want to have another baby, our girl will be 3 in winter and I really wanted her to have a brother or sister close together.
I am worried though...
I am thinking that this might be very selfish from me to get pregnant now In this life we are living ?
Obviously if I end up being pregnant then the baby wont be born for another 9 months BUT we dont know when this is going to end, economy will be in poor state.
We can both mange money wise, I am just worried about everything else, would you get pregnant or wait another year and see how lifes going to be...?

Why would you want to purposely become pregnant during a pandemic? Nobody knows what will happen during or after this. The hospitals are rammed as it is. Be responsible and hold off.

God no, we're in the middle of a pandemic, huge pressures on NHS and no one knows if the virus could be a risk to baby in early pregnancy.

I wouldn't even consider it before a vaccine or at least a decent treatment is widely available, which isn't going to happen within 9 months.

Personally, I wouldn’t. I would wait until things were a bit calmer and more certain. I can understand though, I’ve been incredibly broody recently (although my DD has only just turned one so I think I’m a bit mad ) but we’ve decided to wait until things are calmer. It’s hard when you so desperately want a baby, but if you can afford to wait age-wise, I would.

I have read through the replies and although we’re holding off TTC for now, I’m not sure I’d be happy to wait months and months like people are suggesting. I’m taking it as it comes and hope to be able to reassess in a few months, rather than day 18months.

That said, I’m still relatively young and we were lucky to fall pregnant in the first month last time. If I had struggled I’d me more likely to chance it.

I hope you have been able to make a decision OP and you’re doing whatever is best for you and your family. TTC can be a minefield for some.

I'm 15 weeks and agree it's making it very stressful especially as I'm high risk. My friend carried on TTC despite me warning that it's shit at the moment having scans alone etc. She's just got pregnant and is already complaining about no husband at scans, why can't she even video it and it not being 'how she thought it would be'. I think it's a good time to be heeding the advice of those already experiencing it.

What happens if Coronavirus has similar implications to the foetus like Zika or Rubella? Would you still think it was worth trying for a baby?

Until any implications are known I wouldn’t be trying, even if you disregard any other issues like overstretched NHS, no access to medication as pregnant, financial insecurity.

What happens if Coronavirus has similar implications to the foetus like Zika or Rubella? Would you still think it was worth trying for a baby?
It comes down to your own personal risk assessment surely though. I don't believe any other coronavirus has had such an effect on a developing pregnancy (if anyone has evidence otherwise please share) so I feel the risk is not insanely high of Covid-19 carrying the same.

Maybe to help the NHS they should charge for maternity services for those choosing to put pressure on the nhs and resources during this time. I’d imagine far less would suddenly be TTC if they had to pay for their wants.

I don't think it's the worst thing ever. I'm 23 weeks and I don't feel particularly anxious or scared (although I completely get it's different for those due to give birth shortly!). I'm not worried about going in for appointments (the medical centre and midwifes are super careful), and while there's a small chance that my partner can't attend the birth that's not the end of the world (although not my preference). I'm being careful and barely leaving the house, so not putting myself or baby at risk. Yes I'm missing out on face to face antenatal classes but im still a member of groups where I can chat to other pregnant women. Even if you get pregnant straight away OP it's months before you'd see a midwife anyway.

IceCream
Should we charge people that catch Covid from unnecessary trips outside? Or overweight people seeing as they are more likely to require hospital treatment for Covid? There's lots of things people are doing that are bad in the current situation. Maternity services are not going to be redeployed into covid situations apart from being in the same hospital. Midwives will be left on maternity wards because babies happen. You aren't stealing a midwife away from being on the Covid front line by being pregnant. Unless we were going to do a blanket enforcement of birth control until Covid is over there will always be babies being born/requiring maternity wards and staff.

I’m 13 weeks pregnant so found out before all this started. Not feeling particularly anxious (don’t mean that arrogantly, I know there are risks and am taking all precautions I can). I’m low risk which helps. I’m relieved to be pregnant in a way, because I’m nearly 40, and wouldn’t have wanted to put TTC on hold. I think waiting til the summer and reassessing then sounds like a good plan.

I think it depends how old you are and how likely it is that you will be able to conceive if you wait a year (or however long this all takes).

I am not delaying.
Been TTC 16 months to no avail. We are both healthy late 20s, no (known) fertility issues.
Way I see it, probably won’t happen anyway as it hasn’t yet, so no harm in trying...

OP - A decision to have a baby is such a personal one and everyone's personal circumstances are different, only you know what's best for you.

Medical advice currently is not advising women not to get pregnant, if you are healthy.

I had been trying for a baby and discussed continuing with my GP and found it to be hugely reassuring and helpful. Personally, I'd consider factors such as current health, ability to follow guidelines around Coronavirus (can you easily work from home/physically distance easily etc), personal financial status and the impacts of COVID-19 in your area and on you local NHS trust.

I've just found out I'm pregnant. I'm very financially stable, in excellent health and live in a remote part of Scotland which is in a very different place to other areas of the UK in regards to the COVID-19 status (numbers of cases / dearth's). I'm not anxious as my healthcare providers have been wonderful and very reassuring.

Talk to your other half about all the legitimate government advice from RCOG and make the right decision for you. The support and healthcare is there should you need it.

I think it depends on your age and fertility. If you can wait, I would. I’m just over12 weeks so got pregnant before this all really kicked off. Would I wait if I’d known? I don’t know as I’m 41 and not far off 42 so really needed to get on with it. We have 1 DC already but we lost one to a MMC in 2017 so I was conscious of fact that a) it might take us a while to conceive (it actually only took 5 months) and b) we might suffer a miscarriage or two (thankfully not yet). But I guess we may have waited a few more months.

I’ve had 2 scans without DH and have another on Weds. it doesn’t bother me that much but thibk that’s cos we’ve already got a DC so he’s seen it all before. He is bothered though.

So far my antenatal care has only been different with booking over phone rather than in person and I have a face to face at 16 weeks, plus am consultant led anyway so will still see them and get extra growth scans. But tests and things have been taking longer for results to come back so added anxiety there.

It may also depend on what you and DH do for a living so whether you can protect yourselves by WFH. We’re lucky in that we both can but it’s bloody hard trying to do that and look after DC and so does get us down (more so me than DH)

I think you should make a list of the risks and benefits of trying and give them a score each out of 10. Then add up the risks and benefits to see which comes out on top. Or just go with your gut instinct as that is usually right

I would definitely wait. Everything is changed antenatal appts, scans, labour and postnatal. Partners unable to be at scans unable to stay on ward ante or postnatally and only with you when you are in labour.

Postnatally no visits, telephone call from midwife day 1 and 3 then you come to a postnatal clinic day 5 for bloodspot and weighing of baby then day 10 discharge call.

It's a nightmare not how we want to work and can see it going on for quite a bit.
I'd have a long think about it as this is not even nearly over not by a long long way. Life as we knew it I think will be changed for years.

We chose to put off ttc but I don't know how long to wait. I'm 35 and who knows how long this will go on for

There’s a thread asking the same thing on the conception board. It’s funny how different an answer you get based on where you post... you’d be told to go for it if you’d posted there!

@emvy I thought the exact same thing!!

I wouldn't. Aside from the obvious health and NHS resources implications, it will take the fun out of your pregnancy. Going to scans as a couple, browsing for baby things, baby shower, antenatal classes, showing your bump off to friends and family. All gone if distancing continues.

I want to ttc number 2 soonish so I understand how you feel, but if you can hold off a bit longer it will be so much more enjoyable.

Does anyone think beyond their desires, to what kind of future these potential people will be forced into? We already know there’ll be food and water shortages and climate refugees and no edible animals left in the sea by 2050, extreme weather, etc. People are fine with this as long as they get to produce a kid? Every new consumer will worsen this, and also have to suffer existence in this hellscape dying planet.

‘I will love a baybee and my kid will play with it for a few month period when they aren’t actively fighting each other’ isn’t really good enough in these catastrophic times.

My exact words to DH a few days ago: "I cannot understand anyone who tries for a baby at the moment"

I'd wait. We don't know how long CV will take to be at a manageable level, one that means that antenatal care will be anywhere near decent.