Is lockdown making anyone a bad mum?

[Emcont]

I use the tem bad mum lightly, but it's making me shouty and snappy. It's lowering my usually quite high tolerance level. I feel like I'm drowning!

They are 5 (next month) and 6.5.

They're getting under each other also which isn't helping.

We are lucky enough to have a garden which helps for a while, weather permitting!

Anyone else?

Screen time is unlimited for my 9 year old.but she tells to her friends online a lot of the time and I've not denied her that as shes and many of her friends need the interaction.
School work..shes done the minimal, shes done a bit of gardening. Walked the dog a bit but that's it. Fuck it.

The 12 year old dd is awake half the night, sleeps half the day and is glued to Netflix but has taught herself stuff and is doing her homework and the 17 year old just does her own thing

Talks not tells

Yes, yes, yes. Someone had nailed me on page 1:

Drinking wine in the afternoon? Yes
Unlimited screen time? Yes
Abandoning bedtimes? Not quite, but only because I want to see the back of them, ergo bad mum.
Letting them make their own food (obviously not babies)? Yes

I woke up early this morning to my 7 year old putting Minecraft on at 5am, I pretended I didn't notice.

My 5year old rage quit a game on his Amazon tumble, complete with I DIDN'T EVEN TOUCH THE RED ONE I HATE YOU before throwing it, I didn't remove it and instead I told his 7yr old brother to get him through the level.... for a family bag of haribo.

I'm blaming the heat - and the being trapped in a house

I'm the only one keeping this show on the road, so no, (although wine may he involved )

I changed the time on my phone and put my kid to bed an hour earlier so I could have wine

Thanks to the bastard inconsiderate passage of time, sun, seasons and clock changing, one of mine accused me of changing the clocks. I responded by showing him that cbeebies had gone to bed.... I will now download a cbeebies has gone to bed image so that I can throw to the TV.

My dd 8 has been sitting in bed watching tv or playing roblox on her iPad until about lunch time .
I just can’t be arsed .
Today though I did say enough was enough and she hasn’t had her iPad since so will ration it from now on .. not massively though

Not at all. I've taught them so many life skills they can now cook a meal tidy up their rooms garden. They know how to fix punctures mend cupboards fix a light switch... they can repair a trampoline screw in door handles use super glue to stick a vase back together all the things the little rascals have broken.

Thank you for making me feel better!

It feels like I am. I'm one of the lucky ones who is employed and my work has increased more than ever so I've gone from part time to well over full time hours, therefore his nursery hours has increased and whilst everyone else moans that DC are driving them mad I wish I could spend all day with mine

I feel guilty for not doing enough homeschooling, but my DD aged 5, just turns it into a battle, so I just try and think of fun things we can do instead with some learning involved, even if that means educational programmes on the tv 🙈. Today it has been Sid the science kid most of the day, we did go out and do a bug Hunt, which she then drew pictures of and I managed to get her to write a tiny amount.

I've ended up focusing more on week one on my five year old. I was all super mum teaching from home. My two year old was left to play with his cars. Week three and I feel like a moody bored mess. I haven't been shouting. Their dad is here too. I've found myself going to hide in the bedroom alot. Theres no structure to the day and I feel im letting the kids down.

It's the frustrating feeling of not being able to give them what they need .....which is a trip to the park to burn off aload of energy and to see other children. I can see my kids getting moody and emotional. It's really rubbish for them.

I don't blame you for snapping. Theres no balance for anyone!

Is anyone else just incredibly tired? I am just completely wiped out by 5pm.

My daughter has developed a morbid fascination with the Balkan war through reading a children’s book about it and is now reading all sorts about mass graves, as I found out today. Think she might want to be a UN peacekeeper when she is older though so at least she’ll be out from under my feet eventually

For the first couple of weeks yes.

Then we all started losing our shit so I made a timetable! We don't follow it to the letter obviously but it stops us from just floundering around ir getting stuck saying to dd (3yo) "stop doing that, put that down, don't hurt me, don't break that"!

Yes. I already doubted my ability as a parent, but this lockdown has proved that I'm simply not up to the job.

DS (18 mo.) has been absolutely horrendous to deal with and I've shouted. A lot. Feeling pretty shit about myself. I was under the illusion that my pnd was getting better. I was wrong.

We've also resorted to unlimited TV after my attempts at creating a routine and integrating 'fun' activities into the day catastrophically failed.

Thankle you so much for making me feel less shit,my 7 year olds tablethe had become an extra appendage the last three weeks,school work gathering dustv247.tv, managing to get her on the trampoline for an hour a day but only by constantly watching every move she makes and judging her dances for her.14 year old only appears when called for food.

Excuse typo's, haven't even been drinking 😂

@RedLipsAndRosyCheeks yes Im not sleeping properly. My whole body feels off to. I just feel sickly, headachy etc. I think it's the lack of socialising and excercise. My mind has had enough.

@Tessie87 this made me laugh! My 2yo keeps saying "wessa mote?" Because 2 minutes into Peppa pig she needs paw patrol! Back and forth between the two! Driving me fucking nuts!

Loving this thread!

@LolaSmiles can't stand bing bunny! Whiny little git!

Yep. Me too. Just cannot be bothered with trying to entertain them any more (2 and 5) when I have a SHITLOAD of very stressful work to do (more than I would have done before) and not the 9-5 childcare I normally have. First week I had the virus so was in bed. Second I staggered around and did reasonably well with baking, craft activities, mental maths for older one, reading same books over and over and doing endless stickers (which he always puts in the wrong place so sofas fly through the air etc) with the younger one. This week I couldn't give a crap what they do provided they aren't having an accident. But as if today our TV / WiFi is broken, HEAD SMACK, and I need my phone for work so I have literally no escape.

My husband plays endlessly in the garden with buckets of water and miniature teapots and tag and so on, which is also annoying and weirdly saintlike when he's looking after them. We split the day. One of us dashes off at lunch to fit 9 hours work into 4.

Keep thinking how profoundly enjoyable a few days of solitary lockdown with functional TV and nice things to eat would be. They also eat everything I like before I get to it. My husband gave the almond mini magnum I was counting on to get me through to 5pm / a conference call (I turn my video and mike off for a bit, it's a big meeting) to my five year old. When he suggested I have one of the juicy satsumas in the fruit bowl I was very close to slapping him.

@AllesAusLiebe this is an awful, shit time. My DS is 2.5 but when I had PND being on lockdown would have been utter hell. I don’t know how I would have coped.

Screen time in this house is unlimited too, as it is in most houses I know of. My DS is starting to sound English from watching so much Bing (we’re Glaswegian so it’s a fair stretch). I’ve tried to do loads of crafty things with him but he’s not having it (he cried and bit me when I tried to get him making Easter cards) so I’m thinking fine, just watch some middle aged man opening up Hot Wheels cars for an hour on YouTube. I’ve cried so many times out of just wanting to escape, and generally I’m feeling pretty well in myself right now. So this must be horrendous for you. This situation says nothing about your ability as a mother. Do you have access to any support over the phone? I still see my clinical psychologist, now having telephone appointments every few weeks.

It’s really, really not you - it’s the shite situation you’ve been forced into.

Yes, me too! I wish to God I had more patience. I wish I enjoyed playing with my kids (4 under 10, and they all want me to play with them ALL THE TIME).
I generally feel a bit inadequate but this has brought me to new levels.
On the other hand... all our kids are fed, loved and protected. Maybe we're all actually Super Women, not a bit shit after all. (put Super Woman in this situation, and I bet she'd be fucking shouty)

You don't know how happy I am to see this thread title! I've been dreadful. I'm so shouty and short-tempered with my DS (2.5yo). He is confused at the change of routine, the fact I'm here but not available to play because I'm working, the change in food as so much of our usual stuff is unavailable, the change in energy levels as he is not getting tired out from toddler groups, playdates, swimming lessons, softplay trips, preschool etc, the change in mummy who has become a deranged banshee... Sleep and routine have gone out of the window which is making him more ratty and disobedient which is making me even more shouty. I've been sent about 800 links to educational ideas, craft resources, exercise gurus and easy bake recipes but we've mostly been watching fireman sam and thomas the tank engine (which I'm still finding exhausting!)