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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is it anti-social to smoke in your garden?

235 replies

Mummy102 · 02/04/2020 17:54

Just that really, abiu to smoke cigarettes in my garden?

When I do, I notice my neighbour shut his window. It makes me feel awkward about doing it as I dont want to annoy him, but just wondered if other people even think about it annoying their neighbours? Or am i over thinking it?

OP posts:
woollylizard · 02/04/2020 20:52

Yes it's antisocial and I would absolutely hate it if any of my neighbors did so. However you're within your rights to do so.
Maybe the front would be better?

voiceofsanitary · 02/04/2020 20:55

decide after years of advice that people should not smoke inside that they definitely should...

FFS I'm not saying that it's safe to smoke indoors if there's anyone else around to be affected. I'm saying that it's just as unethical to fill someone else's house with smoke instead.

Smoke outside all you want if it doesn't affect others.

But don't be expecting a ventilator if you catch covid-19 whilst being a smoker or you're MURDERING MY INNOCENT NON-SMOKING NAN

vodkaredbullgirl · 02/04/2020 20:57

Next door smokes as well, so no problem either way.

BeetrootRocks · 02/04/2020 20:57

Having a day at the bottom of the garden is hardly filling a house with smoke.

OP is not murdering anyone, blimey.

If you want anyone who smokes (or has given up in the last year or 2 presumably) to be denied medical assistance then lobby your MP.

voiceofsanitary · 02/04/2020 20:58

Having a day at the bottom of the garden is hardly filling a house with smoke.

If she was at the bottom of the garden the neighbour wouldn't be closing their window, would they?

voiceofsanitary · 02/04/2020 21:00

Smokers who have always behaved like this are far more selfish than anyone going to the shops twice in one week in the current climate, in my opinion.

But far more people defend them than defend 'covididiots'.
Why?

Seetheprettysnowdrops · 02/04/2020 21:00

I agree with others

I hate it but know I can't dictate what others do in their own gardens

I've just got new neighbours and the woman smokes. Unreasonable or not it does colour my view of her.

ArthurandJessie · 02/04/2020 21:03

You have every right to do it but it's annoying! My neighbour stands outside the front of the house ( we live in a semi) and everytime he hears me pull up in the car or leave the house he rushes out there and lights up and tries to speak to me ! It drives me nuts ! I'm heavily pregnant atm and could do without breathing that it all the time and have to walk through it to get to my front door 😡 but I cant say anything because hes on his property! Maybe just be mindful if it's a nice day and they have the window open ... do you have to smoke right there ? I dont think smokers sometimes realise how awful the smell can be to those who dont smoke 🤢 you seem like a nice considerate person to be thinking about this though! :)

BeetrootRocks · 02/04/2020 21:03

So far I've seen

No one should smoke in the garden. If they must do it, do it inside (with their kids)
People must not have BBQs
Single parents should not go to the shops if they have to take their kids (and tough if no other way of getting food)
People with MH issues should snap out of it, get with the wartime spirit, they're selfish
Buying wine is evil
Buying chocolate is evil
Buying a magazine is evil
Talking to a neighbour from a safe distance is murder
Never question the police they know best

Any more?

BeetrootRocks · 02/04/2020 21:04

Arthur why not say, sorry I'm not keen on the smell of smoke, can we have a chat later.

PieceOfMaria · 02/04/2020 21:04

When I do, I notice my neighbour shut his window. It makes me feel awkward about doing it as I dont want to annoy him

This is very simple really isn't it? One of two things is happening:

A) He sits there all day just waiting for you to go outside and light up so he can come and slam his window loudly for effect.

B) He can smell your smokecoming INTO HIS HOUSE within 30 seconds of you lighting up, so he comes and slams his window. because it's intrusive and offensive.

Which of the two do you think is most likely?

You said you didn't want to annoy him, so be a good citizen and don't annoy him. Take a walk to the end of the garden. It that bothers someone else, then take a walk down the street instead.

voiceofsanitary · 02/04/2020 21:06

No one should smoke in the garden. If they must do it, do it inside (with their kids)

Why is it ok to fill someone else's house with smoke and affect them instead?
WHY?

If you want to smoke, have at it! Somewhere it harms no one else, and don't be expecting a ventilator over someone that doesn't.

AwrightDoreenTakeAFuckinDayOff · 02/04/2020 21:07

Likewise.

My neighbours do this. It honks. But not as much as their weed....

They do it right next to the fence late at night and it wafts into my bedroom.

They could easily do it at the bottom of the garden (and they have a summerhouse) so I think it is pretty antisocial that they do it where they do.

That said, they are not isolating, visitors are coming back and fore to their house regularly and they say this virus is nothing to worry about...

AwrightDoreenTakeAFuckinDayOff · 02/04/2020 21:09

So maybe too dense to realise they are annoying people?

voiceofsanitary · 02/04/2020 21:15

So maybe too dense to realise they are annoying people?

Yup - lower conscientiousness, lower IQ.
That's smokers for you. A lot of whom (in my experience) have been at the forefront for shaming people in the current health crisis.
Because they don't have the insight to see their hypocrisy, how much they cost the NHS in a normal year, and how many deaths of others they cause.

Original poster
Mummy102 · 02/04/2020 21:19

@Seetheprettysnowdrops- can I ask why?

OP posts:
BeetrootRocks · 02/04/2020 21:20

'A lot of whom (in my experience) have been at the forefront for shaming people in the current health crisis.'

What have smokers been saying?

'Because they don't have the insight to see their hypocrisy, how much they cost the NHS in a normal year, and how many deaths of others they cause.'

Fags are £11 a pack or something now. The tax take has always been huge.

If people want smokers (and recent ex smokers) denied NHS treatment they need to lobby their MPs.

BeetrootRocks · 02/04/2020 21:21

'Yup - lower conscientiousness, lower IQ.'

Conscientiousness? In what way are smokers less conscientious?

EmeraldShamrock · 02/04/2020 21:22

But don't be expecting a ventilator if you catch covid-19 whilst being a smoker or you're MURDERING MY INNOCENT NON-SMOKING NAN
That is horrible thing to say.
Smoking is a serious addiction the cigarette companies are worth billions.
Is it okay if a non smoker gets the ventilator over your innocent nan,
What if two young patients differ one as a high tax payer against a benefit claimant.
OP is not responsible for coronavirus.

Voice0fReason · 02/04/2020 21:23

Yes it's anti-social, that is obvious by your neighbour's reaction. They don't like it.
Yes you have the right to do it.
Just like having a fire in the back garden - it smells.

AwrightDoreenTakeAFuckinDayOff · 02/04/2020 21:24

I’m not tarring all smokers. Mainly my neighbours. Grin Who are currently sat with their friends in the garden (friends drove here from the next town) and getting off their tits.

I am waiting for the wails should one of them be stricken and demands that us neighbours help them out. Although of course that only ever works one way.

BeetrootRocks · 02/04/2020 21:24

No she's a murderer apparently Hmm

Smoking is legal in the UK and very very heavily taxed. There are already quite strong laws and guidance around where you can and cannot smoke.

If people want it to be illegal then they really need to lobby MP etc

bitchonthepitch · 02/04/2020 21:24

Because they don't give a shit about other people when they smoke outside their neighbours house, when they stand outside workplaces smoking because they can't smoke indoors.

voiceofsanitary · 02/04/2020 21:24

OP is not responsible for coronavirus

She's responsible for smoking though. And she's admitted that she's responsible for smoking near others.

Original poster
Mummy102 · 02/04/2020 21:25

The way I see it is, whether I smoke or not, it wouldn't stop me from caring for you if you suddenly stopped being able to live the life you do, if another illness (yes they do still exist, not just coronavirus) took over your life and you was unable to go to the toilet, it would not stop me from cleaning you up and making you feel comfortable. Etc. So why would you judge someone so hard purely based on the fact they smoke @voiceofsanitary
I will go to the bottom of my garden and not effect my neighbour at all, but @Seetheprettysnowdrops will still have a coloured view of me just because I smoke. Doesn't matter that i help dozens of people live their lives to their fullest daily. Just because i smoke? Righto

OP posts: