To ask genuinely if you aren't following the rules

[MrsKingfisher]

Why? I'm genuinely curious to know why those who can't get to grips with what's been asked of us all at this time or those who need to find a loophole are doing it.

Not key workers etc etc I'm talking about those who simply cannot do as they've been asked. It's mind boggling how simple rules can be so unclear to so many!

Some of my friends just cannot seem to stay at home, just carrying on as if the rules don't apply to them. I don't get it.

So you go to the shop and inadvertently pick up the virus, imagine it’s a bag of sweets, you drop in to see your sister and accidentally leave a sweet stuck on a door handle or hard surface ( patio seat) your sister then picks up the sweet when she wipes down the seat. That’s two households infected.
Infection control is very hard to follow. When you follow it day in and day out you quickly spot the week spots. I went round Tesco’s cringing at the amount of potential cross contamination’s going on.
People using phones while wearing gloves. Using their gloved hands to remove their mask. Opening wallets and purses to use cards.
My routine is surgical gloves on the way in disinfect trolley. No face contact while shopping.
Once shopping is in the car disinfect every surface I’ve touched with the gloves using hospital strength disinfecting wipes. Phone ,purse,cards, handbag, door handles etc.Then remove the gloves and put in a bin.
When I get home unload and wash hands.
As a dentist this would be normal routine between each patient so it’s normal and instinctive. However I don’t usually go to these extremes pre Covid.
Even when I’m not at work I wash my hands obsessively.
Sorry for preaching but this has to become our norm if we want to control this virus.

I am a key NHS worker. I've been off this weekend and only left the house for a run after work Friday to clear my head then a walk this afternoon (didn't stop or talk to anyone).
Although I'm out the house all day I'm really struggling not seeing my parents. I usually see them (and my dogs who live with them) 3-4 times per week and it's so hard. My husband doesn't understand it, he keeps telling me that 'im getting out by going to work'. My parents live 10miles away so I can't even go by as part of my exercise. I've been tempted to call and wave through the window on my way home from work but I'm resisting because it's not allowed.

I work in a supermarket. Today has been my first day off in two weeks. Some of the people I see come in every day! Today was the first time I could stay away from people, and I stuck to the rules!! Tomorrow, I will be out in the world again, and it feels like a very dangerous place to be.

I gave no choice, as it’s my job.

If you have a choice, please do the right thing ❤️

*have

I went to Lidl for my essentials the other day purely as I knew they had compost and I could grab some whilst getting the rest.

My DH is a key worker delivery driver who is now having to a go into work at 2am suppose to 5am from this week just to make sure the vans are loaded with your deliveries.

I'm not a key worker but working from home for a large retailer and dealing with the upset from this.

My garden is literally the only thing which keeps my mental health on a level.
So yeah I didn't need to go the extra 5 mins down the road but I did.

Tbf if anyone is bringing it home it's my DH who has to deal with people who have no idea of safe space every single day

I don't know anyone who isn't following the rules, but I am going out the the supermarket/shop probably once a day as I'm looking after a few elderly people and they generally want something that I'm not allowed to buy more than two items of at once...(usually milk to bread, but for some reason stringless beans seem to feature a lot!).

We've kind of been following the rules. DH walks the dog with the toddler in the morning, and I walk the dog with the toddler in the evening. I did think perhaps letting the toddler go out at all would get us judged (I can see half of MN having a heart attack right now) but we live in the arse end of nowhere and rarely see anyone else, and we pass on opposite sides if we do. The toddler is in a carrier. It would be different if it was a city or somewhere busier. He's bloody horrible cooped up in the house all day and he loves going (even runs to get his coat or shoes when he sees one of us putting walking boots on).
DH has been to the shop last week, but has managed to get a delivery slot for a couple of weeks time (waits to get judged for taking a food slot), so he'll just have to go out and get milk & bread probably once a week or so.
We are both working from home, and face time friends etc. We've been following social distancing and wash hands etc as soon as we get in from our walks.
People can wind their necks in and mind their own business as far as I'm concerned, I don't think we're doing anything "wrong".

I do find it odd that people talk of their government mandated walk a day - there is also absolutely nothing to say that people have to go out once a day, you can do but it certainly isn't mandated!

Sorry we do the extreme method routinely at work due to HIV and HepC amongst other nasties. I wouldn’t have done this normally in Tescos pre Covid.
I draw the line at using a mask safety specs and visor in Tescos since I can socially distance. At work we are less than 12 inches from peoples faces!

It's veggies that I need the extra compost for as expanding the veg plot so I don't need to shop as often eventually

My mil insisted she could come round in a weeks time and see my kids. She keeps saying she just 'cant' be away from them for longer than that. Dh was pretty good at telling her that we wouldn't bend the rules, but I know the conversation isnt over. I think people justify themselves to get what they want. My ils are going to their local shop daily too. Its ridiculous.

It's the same here in Korea. At the beginning, people followed the rules really well, but now that the weather is getting nicer, everywhere is full. When we drive past places, they are packed.

We're not actually quarantining or self isolating or anything like that here, the advice is just 'stay at home as much as possible, don't go to large meet ups'. But still, churches meet on Sundays. Kids are out in the playground. People go to do totally non essential things like karaoke or the pub. It's cherry blossom season and the local governments are on the news every night begging people not to come to see them - and yet, there are hoards of people there.

Even my husband, who is usually very sensible, asked if he could meet his friend for dinner. I was mad.

People think that because the government here have dealt with it well, there's no longer any danger.

I think I’m the only one in the family that’s keeping away from my 80 year old grandparents (my OH is a key worker so definitely don’t want to risk it).

I dont a single friend who not following the rules. I know my neighbours are. The cars not moved and i live in front of house and no one out there, no walkers, nothing

I am care for my youngest dn as they have severe additional needs. I have been socially distancing for over 3 weeks now and my daughter has been off school too as I am vulnerable. My sister and her kids haven't left the house or seen anybody else in 16 days. She can't risk her youngest getting it as they are non verbal and just wouldn't understand hospitals.

We have all been 100% symptom free in this time. I get food delivered here. I split it up, walk to her house round the corner and keep her youngest occupied for a while and work on his PECS, speech therapy and sensory diet while she puts the shopping away and spends some 1-1 time with her other kids ( also autistic). I've not been seeing them every day, but 2-3 times a week on a reduced scale. It's very hard.

Is that bending the rules? Breaking the rules? On one hand the government says I'm a career and on the other I want to reduce my visits and so reduce the risk to us all ( even though we haven't seen anybody else during this time). Either way I have to carry on. Her mental health is hanging by a thread since she's been isolated with 3 asd kids and no support apart from me. Her husband is a key worker and staying away from the home so he is close to hospital.

Everyone in my little town seems to be paying attention.

I take the dog out each morning, DH in the evening. Otherwise we stay home unless we have to go shopping for essentials. We've been doing up the living room, enjoying the garden and generally hanging out around the house.

My sil/bil are doing exactly this. Bil still goes out to work while sil is working from home. Their 2 year old is still going to the childminder because sil says she can’t work while he’s there and it will harm her career. Apparently it’s the best decision for them as a family. The plain fact is she doesn’t want to be inconvenienced. She works in science too so understands the risks. I honestly think it is a case of ‘we’ll be ok’ because they’re not at risk/vulnerable. I have another friend who is still going to her mums house with her children all the time. It’s because she’s lazy and always needs help with the children (she doesn’t work and there are no disabilities etc). Apparently it’s ok because it’s just her mums house. Again, she doesn’t want her lifestyle to change and doesn’t care about vulnerable people.

I haven't today. We now have SIL's kids with us since the schools closed (she works in ICU so it was easier all round for them to move in with us so she could focus). It's made the house bedlam as we have 3 teens, 3 younger kids and MIL in our house already so adding more has been crazy. So we've been splitting up the "getting out" part of the day. I take half of them out once then DH has taken the other half out at another point of the day.

DH hurt his knee playing Twister last night (idiot getting competitive with 3 teens who are much more flexible than him!) so today I've been out twice.

We live in a rural, but touristy place so it's much easier taking the kids out in two small groups rather than trying to manage my younger 3 and SIL's at once and keep them all 2M apart from other people.

I am following the rules as are the people I know. I find it dispiriting, however, to read the multiple threads on Mumsnet where people seem to think they are special and the roles don’t apply to them - eg meeting up with grandparents to ‘exercise’ in park but keeping 2 meters away; taking x2 walk a day instead of x1; saying that an individual risk assessment needs to be made (‘who am I harming?’) and that slavishly following the government’s requirement was a slippery slope to the Nazi gas chambers..,

Yup not left the house for a week now except for local walks
I’m missing my car I love my car
But I do not want CV too many stories of healthy people dying all of a sudden so I’m staying home

I'm not breaking any rules. However, we don't have a car or a freezer so we need to shop for food more often than once a week. I also haven't barred my step children as they are part of the household and their mum and me and dp are all working from home. I've been on a bike ride most days to get excercise.

This breaks some rules that posters have made up for themselves but not the government guidance.

We are, but it's very easy for us to stick to rules because we are farmers, so "home" and our home range includes the farm - thousands of acres to access as and when.

If I were in a flat or even a house with a small garden I think my mental health would deteriorate fairly rapidly and I would definitely need to get out more than once a day.

My DH is very clear that he thinks anyone going out unnecessarily is an arsehole and needs to tow the line. And to a point I agree, but it's very easy for us to sit and judge when we still have so much space and freedom surrounding us.

It's so important for us all to stick to the rules but I can't even imagine how difficult that will be for anyone who values outside space and is deprived of it.

I posted this about an hour ago. You did ask it nicer than I have because I'm fed up with it. Apparently I'm the problem no one else and people can go out as they please because why the hell not!!

I think we are following the rules but my NDNs aren’t. Couple and 3 adult DC plus DGC in house. Friends and relatives including great grandparents coming and going most days .

Because everyone, and their dog it seems, considers themselves an exception.