To think this is torturing single people?

[VirtualHugsAllRound]

Even if it's intermittent lockdown and social distancing... Both mean you're not supposed to meet with family and friends.
If you live alone this is torture. Isolation is used as torture/punishment fgs!
We're always being shown that families are more important, that we've failed by not having a partner and reproducing. Now we are expected to live in isolation for months on end.
And at the end of it, no one is going to say "well done for undergoing months of torture to protect others" or support us with healing from the trauma this will cause. As usual, just expected to suck it up.

I cant do this.

[ShellsAndSunrises]

@VirtualHugsAllRound Do you have the Houseparty app? It’s a group video call but it tells you when people are online, so you can just chat to them (via text or video) when they’re already there, so it’s no extra pressure on them, and if more than one person is there; it’s more of a normal chat.

It’s worked well for us for friends with kids etc.

[Mia1415]

I'm sorry you are struggling OP.

I personally am very happy with my own company. Always have been.

We are all different. I'd much rather be self isolating on my own than with another person. It would drive me crazy.

[BreadmanAndCake]

Christ, there's a lot of arseholes out today, isn't there?
OP, for what it's worth, I understand and yes it is shit. I hope you manage to find a routine and social contact that helps you to feel better and less alone.

[Greendin]

Why don't you sign up as a volunteer then you can get out every day and help others. You can also volunteer just to call other people who are in the same situation as yourself, from home.

[Willowmartha1]

I'd much rather self isolate as a single person ! I would read, sleep, potter etc it's much much harder with a child who needs to be looked after/entertained etc especially when you don't have a garden !!

[Sizeablecontours]

OP I think if you have mh difficulties then it might be more helpful to start a new thread under mh and re-write the op

[EmeraldShamrock]

It is a pity you didn't arrange a single friend to social isolate with you earlier.
Bing watch t.v eat lots of crap and have a chat on your daily walk, wear a mask, keep 2 metres and chat.
If you are having suicidal thought's phone a GP or crisis team, remember thoughts don't become actions be strong.

[AllHailTheKale]

It's a few weeks... this kind of isolation has been my daily life for years and years

[UnfinishedSymphon]

You can't go out for a walk with a friend. You can go out for a walk with a member of your household, not random friends

[PurpleDaisies]

I'd much rather self isolate as a single person ! I would read, sleep, potter etc it's much much harder with a child who needs to be looked after/entertained etc especially when you don't have a garden!

Good for you. The op isn’t you though.

[AvoidingRealHumans]

I dont understand why absolutely everything becomes a competition on here, who has it worse, better etc.
Our struggles are relative to us.
Of course there are people worse off, there always is no matter what the situation.
That doesn't take away from the fact that op is finding it hard.
I would have thought some reassuring words would have been needed. Either isolating is getting to you all or you're a bunch of witches in general.
Either way, it isnt very nice.

[mindproject]

I'm a single parent, we're not finding it difficult at all. We have social media to contact people. We have each other. I still have to go to work as I'm a key worker. Life hasn't really changed that much for us. Nearly everyone abandoned me when I became a single mum (because, you know, most people are a bit shit) so I've had many, many years of being a bit isolated, but we don't mind isolation (because, you know, most people are a bit shit).

[thepeopleversuswork]

It is a difficult time but your solitary state is infinitely better than the people who are trapped in their homes with abusive partners.

This.

Not to minimise the loneliness which a lot of people in all marital states are experiencing. But I think singles, as long as they are well and able to eat properly and stay in touch with their friends, are in a better position than most.

Can't think of anything worse than being in a cohabiting relationship at the moment. Enforced lockdown with someone 24/7. Even a good relationship would be severely tested by this and let's be honest a large amount of cohabiting relationships are based on expediency anyway.

[PrincessHoneysuckle]

@Crystal87 you are NOT allowed to meet up for walks with people you dont live with

[Mintjulia]

Op, concentrate on what you can do.

Spring clean your house
Plan a party for when this is all over.
Read, listen to music, join an on-line choir.
Lean out of your window and chat to whoever is going by, from a distance.

This is difficult for everyone so try to enjoy every tiny thing. Join in at 8pm tonight cheering the NHS.

Text your elderly neighbours and ask if they need help- putting out bins, buying shopping or collecting prescriptions.

[Innitogether]

This article may help OP www.vogue.com/article/coping-with-loneliness-in-self-isolation

I’m very fortunate that I like solitude, even though I am outgoing and sociable, but I was wondering yesterday about how long it would be before I could just hug my family or sit and have a coffee with a friend. I don’t have any answers for you, but maybe keep up with FaceTime and phone calls and maybe meet a friend for a walk somewhere.

I live in a small close where we all know each other and we still have little chats (keeping a distance) and people are looking out for each other. Again, I’m lucky to have that, it’s something I haven’t had before.

Volunteering in your local community delivering food parcels might be an idea? Or maybe volunteer to call vulnerable people who are also alone, but in complete isolation?

[MoonlightMistletoe]

It's not a punishment, we are sacrificing going out and about to protect ourselves, our children and everyone else.
I know it's hard but it's worth it.

[Palavah]

Yes it sucks. But what's the alternative?

@Crystal87 NO!! You cannot do this.
The reference to 2 people is that the police will be allowed to break up gatherings of more than 2 people. I think that's just a wash-up power given that not everyone will have proof/paperwork yet. But please do not meet up with other people to socialise/exercise.

[hardboiledeggs]

I understand that it must be hard. It's hard for everyone from worrying about infecting their families, losing jobs or just getting sick themselves when they are alone etc. Facetime, skype and zoom are all great to keep in touch with family. I know my mental health has taken a knock during this and others will to. If you have someone to call them do so now. YANBU to be angry and sad but YABU to blame others for it.

[PurpleDaisies]

I bet if a single parent posted here saying how hard they were finding it, they’d get support and not comments like “it’s worse for...”

People are totally dismissing the op’s feelings.

[HandBellender]

OP, I am in a completely different situation, but I really do empathise. I agree that this is a form of torture.

Someone very wise once said to me that knowing that things could be much worse doesn't make you feel any better.

I am stuck at home with my 16 and 18 yr olds. I love them dearly, but we don't need to be living together all the bloody time in a space the size of a three-person tent.

I want my friends. I want to be able to chat to people in shops and on the street. I want my life back. I have clawed my way out of depression once, and the main way I have done this is by having real life friends. Friends on a screen aren't the same. Phone calls are nice, but they aren't the same as real life interaction.

I also desperately want to see my partner, who doesn't live with me.

I am so miserable, OP, and I am so sorry you feel the same way.

[emmylousings]

Look OP, it does matter if you die. I don't doubt there are people who love you and you probably have lots to offer the world. I just wanted to point out there are loads of threads on here from people stuck at home with partners they hate - really hate - and they are climbing the walls as they are desperate to get away from that person. Please do not have rose tinted glases about couples or families; they can be throroughly miserable set ups, but you can't see that from the outside.

[SlothMama]

It's really hard for everyone, I'm taking the time to stay in contact with family and friends everyday

[VirtualHugsAllRound]

Wine I get it must be boring but there’s plenty things you can do to fill your time, all this woe is me attitude wont do your mental health any good, find pleasure in the little things and be thankful for what you have got not what you haven’t

I am signed up to NHS volunteers and also a local group dropping off medicines/food.
I am a very weird person in some ways (I have ASD) and seem to cope much better with some of the things in life people think are "big" things (I have seen someone die before and cared for the dying) than things people think are "little"/don't matter. I can - and do - also spend plenty of time pottering around happy in my own company, but not seeing anyone for too long rapidly makes my mental health nosedive.

I also already try to take pleasure in the little things, and the important things. I didn't need CV to happen to grow veg, to enjoy the sunset, to not get caught up in purchasing too many material things, to know friends and family are valuable. But what helped me start to heal from previous trauma was connection with people.

There seems to be an assumption I am not trying my hardest, that I can somehow pull myself together. I can't, it's not working, and I'm frightened.

Thank you to those who have been supportive. x