Am I the only woman in the UK whose..

[LovelyIssues]

Husband has NEVER seen them completely without makeup. Been together 11 years..

Main reason why is I have roscea, acne scars, awful redness and uneven skin.. I hate it and try and hide it as much as possible so I can honestly say he's never without even a bit of foundation on

good luck to you - but not the GP right now please, bit of a crisis on.

if the man is half-decent he won't care, and you can't live the rest of your life like this. Men go round with similar problems and no-one suggests that they must face paint.

I wish you the very best.

mencken Of course the OP can book a GP appointment if she wants to.

I just checked my surgeries appointment availability - there are loads.

Maybe warning patients to stay away if they think they may have a cough/Coronavirus is freeing up more slots.

Please do go see a GP for referral to dermatologist - if you're in the UK, it won't cost you.

I have rosacea, and allergies that affect the skin on my face. I was told by the derm that I have mixed skin type - both oily and dry! It took a while to unravel exactly what my underlying problems were because the allergies were complicating the rosacea diagnosi..., but we got there in the end :)

There are loads of treatments for rosacea that can be tried - antibiotics, creams, laser treatment etc. You really need a derm to recommend the best one to try first.

He knows. And if he doesn't know, it means he's not paying that much attention and so doesn't care about it.
This is not about your skin. It's about your self-perception. I say that as someone who has severe eczema and has cried over how crap I look and the pain. It was terrible on my face in my early 20s. I wear makeup sometimes when I feel like it. It's for a bit of fun and sparkle, not to hide behind.

Try it, one evening. Have a bath, put some healthy moisturizer on and get into bed. Tell yourself that the state of your skin is not who you are. You are so much more.

Thank you @reversiblesequinsforadults , that choked me up

I'm so saddened by this thread

We are all flawed, I wish everyone had the confidence to celebrate our flaws instead of hiding them.

Please take heed of the advice offered on this thread @LovelyIssues.
There are many successful treatments available for your skin. A dermatologist would be able to prescribe something effective.

I think you should talk to your husband and tell him how you are feeling. Although you say you think he is shallow, is he really? I bet he isn't. I bet he loves you regardless of your skin. After 11 years together, I'd be very, very surprised if seeing you barefaced would have him running for the hills.

I always put make up on in the mornings, even if I’m not going out. But for some reason yesterday I went out without it (food shop and walk dog in rain). Had a shock when I looked in car mirror but thought “whatever” and left it off all day. Dh didn’t notice. But he’s seen me without before, in the evening after a bath or when I’ve had a cold/ flu.

Yes to seeing your GP/getting a referral. I've seen Sali Hughes recommending products for rosacea so it might be worth looking at her column or instagram in the interim.

Others ways it effects me is I cant wear sunglasses because it rubs my makeup off across my nose and under eyes and I don't feel confident enough to wear my hair up. My hair is like a veil to me

My dh has seen me give birth twice - once vaginally and one section.
There are parts of me he has seen that I haven’t.

I never wear it my poor hubby only sees my blemish face!

It sounds like you really need to see a dermatologist, randoms on the internet can give you advice that may help, but equally it could make your skin much worse as it sounds incredibly sensitive. You really should see a specialist.

It's possible to be referred to a good dermatologist on the NHS. There used to be (not sure if still is) a pretty famous one, Sam something, who despite having private clients also had a clinic at the Whittington Hospital in Holloway, London. Please go and see your GP and press for a referral.

I have done the following to get rid of redness and keep the rosacea under control. Before I did this it was painful and very unsightly. I have removed the following from my diet...cooked tomatoes, red wine, yeast, canned tuna, peanuts (foods high in histamine). I use LRP Toleriane cleanser, facial spray and Eucerin anti-redness cream. I can only use Bourgeois make up with no spf at all. If I do all of the above and use prescription metrogel when I get lumps and bumps I can cope.

And the thing that I've seen more people recommend as a true wonder-product for acne rosacea is only available on prescription. One more reason to see a dermatologist.

There's a body of opinion that rosacea is caused by the Demodex mites, microscopic mites that live on our skin (don't google them, they're disgusting). The stuff that kills them should really only be prescribed, even if you find it online from supposed online pharmacies.

It's clearly a big, big issue for you, but believe me, he won't notice. He really won't.

Go to your GP and explain how badly your skin condition is effecting your mental health and lifestyle
Ask for help

@ScrambledSmegs exactly. There are wonder drugs for rosacea and other skin problems but they don’t come in £5 bottles from cosmetics companies or paid recommendations from internet randoms or Sali (bloody) Hughes. They come from highly trained, world class dermatologists who we have access to free of charge with one simple visit to a GP.

OP do not use your sensitive skin as a testing board for recommendations made to you by well-meaning strangers on Mumsnet.

Do as you’ve been repeatedly advised to do. See your GP and start the process of getting medical help for a medical issue. You clearly also have quite deep seated psychological issues around all of this, please mention this to your GP, too. Most surgeries have a GP with an interest in dermatology so it’s possible you could be given effective treatment without even needing to join a long nhs referral queue.

I was put on Oxytetracycline for my rosacea and acne and it really helped OP. When I was a teen/early 20s my face would be so red and sensitive. I've been on two 6 month courses of Oxytetracycline and it cleared all my spots at the time and toned down the rosacea. Haven't been on it for about two years now and I still get occasional spots and my nose and cheeks are pink but easily covered with a BB cream rather than a full coverage foundation like before.

Covering your face with a towel and putting on tinted moisturiser just sounds like a lot of pressure on yourself OP. I still hate other people seeing me without makeup but I couldn't imagine hiding away from DP.

I had terrible rosacea. I read every thread on Mumsnet that mentioned it and the product that got great feedback more than any other was Soolantra. I got it on prescription from the doctor, it took about 4/5 months to clear completely but it started working right away, took the redness down too.
I was seeing a dermatologist for a potential dodgy mole, and out Of the blue he said u hope you don’t mind me asking, how do you get on with Soolantra (he must have read it from my medical notes) as it wasn’t a product he was familiar with (cant remember what he said he usually prescribed, Demodex or similar) and he was interested in it.
There’s someone on u tube who has done a video diary of herself over the months while using it.

If you do see your GP or a dermatologist, speak to them about Soolantra. I had rosacea for 10 years. I was using Rozex very successfully but then it stopped working. Someone on the Facebook site Rosacea Support Group UK (highly recommended BTW) suggested Soolantra.

I started on it in April last year. By June my rosacea had gone (the pimples - so sore they would bleed). I've been clear for almost a year now. I still flush if I have a glass of wine or in intense temperatures (so winter and summer are a nightmare) but I can deal with the redness - for me it was the pimples. At one point I had a strip from the top of my nose on the side, round to mid chin. I couldn't wear jumpers that winter as they would break and bleed.

I ended up getting mine from Superdrug on line - you have to send a photo to their on line doctors. My GP was supportive of me using it (I'd never try without his OK as he knows my medical history) but his practice couldn't afford the £38 tube - Rozex is about half that. So I paid it. I'd spend that on a hair cut so...

Have you tried The Ordinary? I started a regime (they recommend one for you if you email them) in January and have now started going foundation free occasionally for the first time since I was 13! I can’t recommend their stuff enough

This breaks my heart, I have a friend like you. We've been on girls weekends away and she has heavy makeup on constantly. She has struggled with her skin to say the least. I just wish she trusted us to go make up free, I don't even mean daytime but at least overnight.
Please please get an appointment, speak to your husband and say you need to get it sorted. He will know ( I agree with a previous poster).
You have to prioritise this as it's impacting your life and ultimately your families
Huge hugs to you

@LovelyIssues I think it's very odd. Then again, I have known of women who have been with a man for 8-10 years, and won't do a shit in the house when he's there. I don't know how a relationship can work long term with these issues tbh. I couldn't do it. Rather be alone than live like this.

You definitely do have issues. As a few posters have said, this is no way to live at all. You need to talk to your DH about this. It really isn't great.

I went to work once makeup free and I was asked if I was ill!

This will happen if you are caked in it all the time.... When you wash it off you will look like a ghost.