Am I the only woman in the UK whose..

[LovelyIssues]

Husband has NEVER seen them completely without makeup. Been together 11 years..

Main reason why is I have roscea, acne scars, awful redness and uneven skin.. I hate it and try and hide it as much as possible so I can honestly say he's never without even a bit of foundation on

Sorry
I’m new and don’t know how to 😀

Will do

I can't be arsed with make up any more unless I'm forced to go out out (it's just polishing a turd at this point) BUT he will never, ever see me naked under any form of conditions that are not pitch black!!!

Pure vom!!

I love it when an old and interesting thread gets revived.
@LovelyIssues are you still around ?

@DeepThinkingGirl

Awwww I’m sure he loves you the way you are

You need to tackle your insecurity for your own sake I think. Need to learn to self love

My DH has seen me with a lot worse than acne on the skin I tell u.

This! I have horrible eczema on my face and I hate anyone seeing it. Do whatever you can to get through. It's crap but just look after yourself first and worry about everything else after.

Please see a dermatologist. Believe me, they won't be shocked. Their whole livelihood is based on people with dodgy skin getting treated and I can tell you that if you can cover it with makeup then it's not that bad. They can tell you if you really do have rosacea or something else. They can prescribe stuff that really does work rather than a lot of random recommendations. Skin with rosacea has to be handled very gently, trying to avoid extremes of hot and cold, maybe cutting down on alcohol and caffeine - piling on a load of products does not count as gentle handling. If you have oily skin, I can't understand why you are putting moisturiser on, tinted or not. Here is a link to a dermatologist's site dermnetnz.org/topics/rosacea/ - it's a NZ site so it does mention sun more than you probably need to worry about, but it does have proper medical advice and is not pushing any brands or commercial products. I have rosacea but it's controlled and nobody looking at me even without makeup would know but I absolutely know what its like to have sore red inflamed skin under a layer of makeup.

Women look better with makeup....? Since when?

I never wear makeup. Think I look rediculous with it on. I have a few friends who work with virgin who constantly bworry about their makeup. Drives me barmy. Wasn't happy when they told me I should wear makeup.... Because that's what classy women do. I walked off. I don't speak to them any more.

I also wear a headscarf as I am Muslim. They told me I was opressed. I told them they were as they were wearing make up to please others and do not let people see who they are at all... So if I'm opressed they are too.

Hope you get the confidence OP to bare your skin. It will make your skin feel better too to let it breathe. Try not to worry what other people think. If they are bothered then they aren't true friends!

Just to add to my post. I am not saying women should never wear make up. Far from it. If it makes you happy wear it. It's the telling women they need makeup to look good that makes me angry. You do you and I will do me but many women like to comment on others appearances

My husband has seen me push out three kids from my vagina. Screaming and sweating and vomiting afterwards.
I think he can take seeing me without makeup 🤣

By the way skin doesn't breathe - it's really not sucking in oxygen. I do think almost any woman looks a bit better with some makeup - even if it's only a lipstick but it is of course people's choice about wearing it.

When do these husbands actually tell their wives that they prefer them without make up? When does this conversion arise? I'm not bad looking, but my husband hasn't ever told me he prefers me without make up, why would he? and if he did I'd laugh in his face. I think every woman has had the 'are you ill?' comment when not wearing make up when they usually do, surely it's because make up makes most people look a bit perkier due to blusher, mascara and lipstick enhancing ones features. It's reminds me of Cindy Crawford quote 'even I don't wake up looking like Cindy Crawford'. What I'm saying is that nearly all women look better in make up but that doesn't mean your true face is bad, everyone should feel comfortable with or without it. And I 100% agree that seeing the gp etc is the best way to go instead of buying lotion and potions recommended to you. You could wear your make up to the appointment, remove with a make up wipe, carry your foundation in your bag and reapply it before leaving. Good luck.

On the off chance that OP is still around, I follow r/skincareaddiction and there’s also a subreddit called r/rosacea and both are full of examples of skin problems including before and after photos showing the use of specific products and routines.

This thread has examples:
www.reddit.com/r/SkincareAddiction/comments/kltmvr/skincareaddictions_best_of_2020_awards_voting/

@DeepThinkingGirl

Maybe the difficult skin is because you never take make up off though ?

I have a complexion like the surface f the moon because of acne scars*, and I rarely wear make-up. I won't pretend I "love the skin I'm in" but it's what it is - and it definitely it more acne prone (even now - I'm 67) if I wear lot of make-up (as I occasionally do fora night out etc).

Your skin needs to breathe or your pores get blocked and spotty etc.

*Not just face - shoulders, chest and back, too

It doesn’t matter if you’re the only woman (you’re definitely not btw), if not showing him your skin makes you feel more comfortable then that’s fine. Do whatever you’re comfortable with and he really won’t care either way.

Mmmmmyeah, no woman "looks better" without makeup. Unless your usual makeup is drag style. But a bit of tinted moisturiser, some lip liner, a bit of blush and shadow on the lash line - it's pretty obvious that yes every woman would look better with some makeup on, and I agree with PP that this is just a trope that men have been taught to recite.

As for OP, I feel for you and would be interested to hear how your journey has been advancing!

Just a thought for you OP, this happend to me randomly so I "proved" the cause...

Used clinique for years, from a teen mainly due to my mum introducing me, then inertia.

A friend booked me in with Laura Mercier, and I switched, bought a whole set of makeup - and you know it was better! so I carried on using it. The after a few months, I started developing cystic acne, large horrible spots...didn't even connect it with the makeup.....carried on for a couple of years, my chin was getting red and scarred. Then randomly saw another LM consultant and said I was having issues and she switched my foundation immediately to a different one that wasn't quite as good but "oil free". I still had issues though and realised that the LM moisturiser, the other stuff were still a problem.

The penny dropped, I switched back to clinique and over 4-5 months my skin returned to normal.

Now, mine is a little of an odd case, as I had never really experimented with make up and stuck with one brand from puberty. A single switch resulted in awful skin.

Its also made me realise how easy it is to "not realise" what is causing acne, even when its staring you in the face!

(I'm not a Clinique rep BTW)

@LovelyIssues

Whatsnewpussyhat - I think he would be shocked. He would definitely say something like 'whats happened to your face!' it's so red it almost looks burnt

Why would he say that when he knows how self conscious you feel and that you struggle with anxiety about it ?

OP this sounds very tiring having to worry all the time about getting your make up on etc. My sister has terrible skin rosacea etc but she has a beautiful face...... I bet you do too. Maybe speak to your husband and just tell him that you feel worried about going to bed with no make up etc. What's the worst that can happen?

@HollyCarrot have you tried dead Sea saltS?

Every other day I wash my face with a small handful of the salts, scrub them in (be warned, it does Tingle!) And rinse and pat dry before bed. Make sure you use a good moisturiser though after (not greasy) Works wonders

My ex once said to me "what's wrong with your face?" after coming out of the shower. It wasn't as bad as I thought, as he as curious as opposed to laughing at me. After he saw me, he accepted it and that was that. It felt good.

You just need to do it, OP. Bite the bullet and be uncomfortable, then you don't have to hide anymore. He's your husband, after all!

@Rangoon

By the way skin doesn't breathe - it's really not sucking in oxygen. I do think almost any woman looks a bit better with some makeup - even if it's only a lipstick but it is of course people's choice about wearing it.

It may not "breathe" but the fact is it absorbs and I think that is what the saying suggests as opposed to taking in oxygen and pumping out carbon dioxide

@mellowyellow101 I can't countenance anything new near my face. Have to be really careful!

There's no way on this planet I'd rub dead sea salt into my face!

In over 30 years have marriage I reckon I have worn makeup maybe 20 times (special occasions like weddings). I hate the stuff.

Years ago I had a colleague who never let her DH see her without make-up. She would wash her face and put on her make-up when she went to bed and, in the morning, she would just put another layer over the top. 😂 She always looked like she was going out to a nightclub. Haven't seen her in a long time. Last time I saw her she had s young son and was still doing it then.