If nursery or childminder called to say you need to collect your child

[kevintheorangecarrot]

Due to illness / diarrhoea etc, how long is appropriate for them to wait? My husband and I work 45 minutes away and a while ago it took me over an hour to collect him because there was flooding so I couldn't get the train and had to wait for a taxi. Another time, my husband cannot just up and leave work (long story as to why) so he has to wait til he finishes which is usually in 2 hours or so, then another hour to travel if there's been no delays that is! We have nobody else to collect our child as we've moved to an area where we haven't got any family around. I do feel like it is taking the piss but what else are we supposed to do? We could move nearer to our work but the area is very, very expensive (think London for example) and there's no way we'd be able to afford to buy a house there, let alone a rent.

I've only taught in secondary and post-16 and I still can't imagine a school sending a student in an ambulance without a member of staff, even if it means shoving two classes into the hall or something. Let alone if the student was a 4-year-old.

All the childminders I know are full, and tend to be busy/out and about - so not very practical as an emergency back up!

Childminders must have a plan and policy for this, what if the childminder themselves needed to go to hospital or if their own child did? A local network of childminders that help each other is the most usual way I have seen but maybe there are other ways.

My plan is - I’d call my mum and children’s parents, but in an emergency a child would go in an ambulance.
You can’t delay a child getting lifesaving treatment to wait for someone to turn up and look after the other children.

I can't drive, there are very few places I can be within 30 minutes! Generally only if it's within walking distance. Obviously I would get there as soon as I could. IME it very rarely happened.

Ask at school too, sometimes there are sahm happy to help, I volunteered.
I'd take a sick child home quite often, it's awful seeing a child sitting outside waiting for a parent to turn up.
I was so bad at a school where one of my dc attended that they brought in a new ruling.
You had to provide somebody to collect in 10 mins or you weren't offered a place. It was backed by the LA as no spare staff and nowhere for a sick child to stay. One square foot through the door, then the receptionist window and the office.
You can't have children listening in to sensitive conversations so they waited outside for collection.

@Devlesko - the Jobcentre expects people to commute for up to 90 minutes. Perhaps you should have a word with them.

And as for 'making sacrifices', many single parents are working bloody hard just to put food on the table.

what do you do if your childminder calls you to warn you she can't pick up your child from school because they are going to hospital with another child?

In many cases, it's really not possible to drag the kids you have, and ignore the ones you are due to pick up. Even if you have an agreement with another childminder, unless you are neighbours, I imagine that by the time all the kids are taken care of, the parents of the sick one will have arrived.

What happens in hospital? Well, there are nurses and doctors there, and presumably the parents are rushing anyway so won't leave their own child alone for days either.

Parent's need to learn to be responsible for their kids, and put them first. Yes, people have to work, but work nearer to school, find some other contact if they are ill. If two parents take work where one of you can get away for an ill child. Stop being so bloody entitled and expecting educational services to nurse your ill child because you can't be bothered to sort something out yourself.
If you really can't find alternative cover, find a job closer to home, make sacrifices for your children, they deserve parents who care.

Do you know how rude and patronising this is? My son is the most important person in my universe. And you think I don't care about him because I don't work near to his school every day? And I don't have a support network?

You think I can just get a job nearer to his school? Do you think that people choose to do long commutes just for the fun of it? Don't you think that maybe people would chose to work closer to home if they could?

Do you think people can just magic up some amazing person that is at home and local and ready to rush to the aid of a child that is sick.

Life isn't like that!

DS2 was transferred by ambulance when he was about 2 hours old. Nobody could go with him as DH had to drive his car to the hospital, and he was alone in SCBU for about an hour while DH parked and filled in paperwork.

It's not nice for a child to be alone if they are of an age to understand a bit of what is happening and be frightened, but if it is actually life threatening then I would think that would be secondary to actually getting them whatever treatment they need - you can deal with their feelings about it later, horrible though that may be.

This sounds like a much more remote scenario than a child with a D&V bug or a bit of a temperature!

My child had to go to A&E while he was on a day out with his childminder (1/2 term). She was a good 45 mins away from her home/base, which is only 10 mins from my home (where I work).

Fortunately because it was a day out she had met up with another CM so there were 2 adults with the kids varying from a few in buggies to age 9 and 10.

DS went in the ambulance and both CMs followed in their cars to A&E.

She phoned me as soon as it happened, but as I didn't know which hospital they were going to I just had to wait at home until she called me again. Then of course I went straight away to meet them all at A&E.

It was an emergency situation, she handled it, all kids were taken care of and I got there as soon as I could.

I was technically a patient at the hospital I'd given birth at, couldn't be transferred with him as it was the middle of the night, they'd already got the on-call paediatrician out of bed, and had to be discharged before I was actually able to go and visit him, which was horrible, but necessary and everything was fine.

@Devlesko - the Jobcentre expects people to commute for up to 90 minutes. Perhaps you should have a word with them.

Schools don't provide nurse maids for your ill child, it's your responsibility as a parent. There's absolutely no excuse, work closer.

And as for 'making sacrifices', many single parents are working bloody hard just to put food on the table.

Yes, and again nothing stopping them working closer to school.
I can't believe the entitlement of some people. School isn't childcare it's education.

@JustInCaseCakeHappens the childminder would tell me that my son is going with one of the other local childminders that day as there has been an emergency.

Its one of the key questions I was always taught to ask when looking for a childminder - what is your policy/ what do you do if one of the children in your care needed emergency treatment.

I'd far rather them be over their ratio's for an hour or so, than a child being sent to hospital on his own without a familiar face.

All the childminders I know work with others and if an emergency happened and the childminder had to take a child to hospital the children would go to another one and I've signed to say I am happy with this.
Our CM registered her husband as her assistant for circumstances like this (and the occasional day when we needed to drop off at school run time).

@Devlesko I call BS, there's no way for a school to refuse a child a place on those grounds. It would never get through an admissions appeal.

@LowcaAndroidow in what circumstances could a CM have 7 other children to care for?

Surely the school are responsible for their care until a parent arrives.

No, that's the parents' responsibility. The school's responsibility is back at the school with the other children. Why can't some people get that? Fair enough if there are spare staff but if there aren't then the paramedics cope until the parent arrives.

You don't throw nearly 60 kids in the hall to be managed.

@Devlesko as you appear to have all the answers can you please come and find me a job that is closer to my son's school.

It does need to be on my current wage as I have an expensive mortgage and bills to pay. The company also needs to be as flexible as my current company who lets me work from home, take time off when needed etc to care for my son.

I wish you good luck as there are no large businesses near me (its a commuter town).

And presumably you don't think that anyone with children should be in a job that they can;t just leave immediately, so police, doctors, teachers etc?

And presumably you don't think that anyone with children should be in a job that they can;t just leave immediately, so police, doctors, teachers etc?

I expect them to put their children first. The teachers I know all have emergency cover, they wouldn't expect the school to take care of ill children because the parents can't be arsed.
HTH

There are plenty of parents who can't just leave work, you find cover.

I'm wondering what "cover" people find? There are no ad-hoc nannies around here, no paid babysitters who provide this service. My neighbours either work, are elderly or don't drive. Other parents at school work. Or don't want someone else's vomitty child with them. Plus do I provide all these with carseats just in case?

@Devlesko - do you really honestly think that parents can't be arsed because they are working to provide for their children and aren't on the doorstep of the school???

I'm astounded that anyone could think that way.

Where should I find cover if my child is sick then? I'm a lone parent. My parents are dead. My neighbours all work full time. My friends that are local all work full time.

I'm in a small commuter town, No nannies around here.

If you really can't find alternative cover, find a job closer to home, make sacrifices for your children, they deserve parents who care.

What a unpleasant thing to say. I assume you live in a city and have no idea what rural communities are like. It simply isn't possible to work locally to a school in many areas.

Horrible to suggest that parents who work don't care about their children.

"I wonder what schools and childminders did before mobile phones "

I was at school 1960 - 1974, for some of which some parents didn't have any phone at all

In those days, every school had a sickbay / room with aspirin, plasters etc where a sick kid could lie down until usual hometime
Noone was traumatised by this

My secondary school of 500-600 pupils had a permanent nurse there;
at my small primary school, the head would keep an eye out

If they had a key, kids were allowed home on their own
When I once had a head injury, the head drove me home

If an ambulance was needed, a teacher would usually go with the child until the parents could be contacted, often not until the end of the day

First of all I didn't say parents who work don't care for their children, although I gave up work and lived on next to nothing because with no network of care, I put the kids first, unusual by the sounds of it

There are plenty of things you can do that doesn't involve being entitled and expecting others to cover for you when you can't be arsed to find an alternative, or worst still carry on as you are as if it's a given school will manage.

I've seen children ill waiting for up to an hour because a parent cba. I used to take ill kids the same as other sahm's, cover inset and snow days. You need to find cover, not expect school staff who already have a job to do yours as well.

In those days, there was almost no paid childcare, including after school clubs

Our primary used to send the older children home on the basis that their mum would be there, or that they could wait on the step until she was. And the children of working mothers had a house key around their neck, or on a string hanging from the inside of the door. 1970s.