AIBU to be worried about gender disappointment

[YouDoYou18]

We have a scan to find out the gender in 7 hours and suddenly I’ve found I’m very very nervous.
We have two DDs that I adore, and honestly I don’t mind if it’s another girl, I’ve got some girl names picked out and I can imagine having three daughters playing in the future and I really love the idea... But.
This is going to be our last baby and I would also really like a boy, I’d like to have that relationship and bond with a son as well as my daughters. I know it sounds ridiculous but my daughters are daddy’s girls (which I love and it melts my heart daily) and I know there’s no guarantee a son would be a mummy’s boy.. but I’m just worried that I’m going to end up almost grieving for the fact I’ll never have a boy.

Is this ridiculous? I’m sure I will love any baby, but I can’t get rid of this nervousness and it’s making me feel like an awful parent!

Congratulations @YouDoYou18. I was desperate for a girl after 2 boys and wasn’t afraid to admit it. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have loved a 3rd boy, but sometimes you cant help how you feel

Fantastic!

Congratulations 💙

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

So pleased for you!

Yay, congrats OP! 🥳

Congratulations xx

Hurrah! I'm so pleased for you. I hope the birth goes well, and that your DDs love their wee brother

Congratulations!

Glad you are happy.
Scans were only coming in where we live when I had my second . I had a late scan, but no picture or anything. Mentioned the name I had and was told that it very much looked like the opposite. The scan was for health reasons which did not show until teen years on both kids and dh.!
I was glad I wasn't sure of what I was having, this got me through labours !
I had beautiful outfits chosen for bringing my babies home, but that did not materialise as the clothes were way too small, both were dressed in blue, pink, lemon and white and second hand clothes, yes I am organized also, I had read all the books but sadly my babies hadn't. As a midwife said, " babies can be unpredictable". They are also both a privilege and a blessing .

I have 3 boys and no way would they be into ballet, im.aware boys CAN if they wish but lets be honest boys would get bullied for it. Theres plenty of girl only hobbies and also boy only hobbies

You sound incredibly ignorant: ballet is and always has been a unisex discipline. The male dancers were more prominent than the females until the late 18th century. Ballet would be shit without men. Idiot.

And congratulations OP!! Xx

crispy I agree: idiot.

My friend was an incredibly successful male ballet dancer- he had a wonderful career and life until he retired aged 32. He now has a different career but is still the fittest person I know- total athlete.

@crispysausagerolls your the idiot!! Im giving my opinion, allowed isnt it????

@Snoopdogsbitch your also an idiot

FFS ballet isn't a common boys hobby though is it . she's hardly an idiot why do these threads always end up nasty .

*you’re

It’s not a common boy’s hobby despite being, as I said, a UNISEX discipline, because of nasty and ignorant people who perpetuate the idea that it is only for girls. Funny how you don’t see girls getting bullied for playing football, which was originally an all-male sport.

I have 3 boys and no way would they be into ballet, im.aware boys CAN if they wish but lets be honest boys would get bullied for it.Theres plenty of girl only hobbies and also boy only hobbies

They would not be in to ballet becuase of your stupid prejudices. How sad.

I’m 73, I was a feminist from my teens . I’ve fought long and hard over the years for women’s rights and am now engaged ( along with many others) in the fight of our feminist lives to protect sex based women’s rights. And some of you on here, all young enough to be my daughters at least and maybe my granddaughters think you’ve got the right to play fast and loose with concepts of sex and gender because you just don’t see why it matters. What right have you to join in risking and throwing away our previous rights by ascribing meanings to words as you decide like Humpty Dumpty.

My dd never wanted to know the sex of either of her two babies because she honestly couldn’t begin to see the relevance and the idea that she would have married a man who cared either is risible.

Great post Bourdic

Why is it ‘risible’ to want the experience of raising one, or other or both sexes?

@Bourdic the reasons a person might struggle with the sex of their unborn child are myriad and complex. I take my hat off to you. I've only been a feminist (in a way I could articulate) for 30 years and am these days, quite radical and wholly GC. However, I appreciate that sometimes, people's honest reactions to situations in which they find themselves are not filtered through my perspective but their own.

kosh bourdic are you 2 sat together posting on this thead? When one comments the other comments straight after bigging up their comment

People just love the feeling of being superior and more "progressive" than others. In real life, most people have a slight preference for a girl/boy. They then find out- it's either what they wanted/thought, or they take an hour to adjust their thinking, and get excited again.

It isn't cool to be oh so laid back about not caring what sex the baby is because gender is a social construct blah blah blah. It's a bit pathetic.

It's like going to dinner and being in the mood for steak, but they don't serve it. So you think "oh well", pick the cod and have a lovely time. We are human. We have different preferences and thought processes. You are allowed to slightly prefer one or the other (which is usually down to life experiences and how you've been raised, too).

So, yes. Can we stop acting like those who have a tiny preference are unintelligent scum? You have no idea why they have that preference. Let people feel things. Thanks.

Yes that's right. Of course we are.

@PepePig

Well said