I’ll start this thread by saying I’ve NC’d as I think my mother is actually on here, and I’m talking about people who have children who are ALIVE and available to see.
My M is an active member of a dog rescue group, she often holds large fundraising events, and sponsors dogs from foreign countries to be brought over here for a better life.
I have absolutely no issues with this at all, it makes her happy, and I always volunteer my time for the cause when her events are on.
However the group she is on, on FB, is full of bizarre posts when they use strange language such as ‘Hello Hoomins!’ and ‘I wuvs woo’ when posting as their pets, and refer to them as their children, fur babies and ‘dogters’.
They seem to spend all of their time with their animals, and that is fair enough if you don’t have children/grandchildren/other people in your life, however some of these have young children or grandchildren they could be spending time with.
My own mother has had 4 dogs, 3 from the rescue she fundraisers for, and she is guilty of treating her pets as children.
Actually, they’re prioritised and treated better than her two children.
She’s not suffered a loss of a child or had them there as a way of coping about another loss, so no it’s nothing like that, that’s a totally different kettle of fish so I’m not interested in those stories.
2 died recently, a ratty little one who hated everybody except her (not through lack of trying) and a childhood dog who we all felt the loss of.
Now she has gone into a depressed state of mourning.
Weirdly, she didn’t even mourn her own father like this. He’s still in the plastic jar he came back from the crematorium in.
One of the people she knows from the group posted on her wall when her birthday cake around saying how she was sorry she wouldn’t have her babies with her on her special day. I have to say I was a bit confused, as she has two ACTUAL children she would be spending time with in the day.
She has a shrine for the dogs with pictures and candles scattered about, and they sit on a shelf in wooden boxes.
She’s had pretty much every day to see her children and grandchildren, but makes excuses regarding her dogs as to why she cannot go out/meet up/have visitors, come over.
I understand that after a while, pets are seen as part of the family, but to prioritise them above your actual children is baffling to me!
I have a pet and whilst I love him dearly, and would be heartbroken should he die, I wouldn’t choose them over my children.
So, I thought I’d put this out there and add a poll, I’m expecting to be slaughtered as I know a great majority of MN are avid animal lovers.
YABU - People who treat their dogs as children, despite having their own, are perfectly normal.
YANBU - People who treat their pets as children, despite having their own, are a bit odd.