To have the biggest bedroom?!

[Anotheryearpasses]

It's just me and two DC. Youngest has been complaining about having a tiny room and I've been trying to work out how to change it. A huge chunk of his room is taken up by built in storage. Not sure I have the money to have it all pulled out just yet but maybe in a year or so.

It seems like an obvious solution that I should swap rooms with him.

I love my bedroom though and sometimes we are all in my bed. No idea how I'd fit in the small room but as he gets older it'll probably mean more to him to have a bigger room.

He’s 6. You can get rid of the storage eventually. Keep your bedroom.

Nope. Adults get the master bedroom or you're pandering to him. He'll start thinking that he deserves more respect than you do.

It's annoying he has a small room but at least he has his own room!

Can you redecorate for him?

I have the smallest room and my ds the largest, but he is 18 and 6ft2, and wouldn’t fit in my room. Also, I am single so the small room is fine.

Of course he doesn’t get the biggest room, he is six! He shouldn’t have it at 26 either.

I loved in a box room until I was 22 then I moved out. A box room with a single bed and six inches of floor space between my wardroom and the bed to stand up in.

I am unharmed by it even if I moaned about it lots as a teenager, it was my room and my personal space and at least I didn’t have to share it.

If your Dc have a big gap then he can move into his brothers room when he moves out, until then get used to it.

ebay is your friend for loft/cabin beds - as they are often a fraction of the price ...as dc have them from 4-10ish the move to either loft or normal beds as they get older....if you look for 'makes' theres a danish/swedish brand Thuka?? DS was the 3rd child to use his and we sold it on again ....

(The small room was his room for many years and the largest my ex’s. Long story.)

Sorry but this just remind me of Regina George's "it was my parents' room but I made them trade me "!

@mylittleboo the alpha theory for training dogs has been debunked as cruel and unsustainable by reputable dog trainers. I think using it on your family is definitely a step too far!

There are some very unpleasant people on this thread showing their true colours. At no point has the OP said her child has “demanded” the larger room, and yet there you all go into defensive mode, “I pay the mortgage so what I say goes”. Whilst I wouldn’t let a 6 year old dictate anything, I’d hate to live in a house where one person controls everything with no discussion just because they pay the bills (financial abuse?).

@Anotheryearpasses I think it would depend if the built in storage is useable for your stuff and you can still get you bed in there. IKEA do a double high sleeper which might be worth looking at. Alternatively, how big is the second bedroom? Could you have that, split the largest room (your current room) for the kids with a curtain or a screen, and use the tiny room as a toy room.

For fucks sake are people really so stupid that they think a 6 year old will believe that having a bigger room means he doesn’t have to respect his mother 🤦‍♀️. Where on earth would he even get that idea from in the first place?

My DCs have the bigger rooms, because they use theirs for playing. We use ours for sleeping. It would not make sense for us to take the biggest one just because we are adults, whether we need it or not.

But OP I do think a cabin bed here would be a good solution.

Does your other child have a bigger room? If so I'd stick them both in bunk beds in the small room and have the other bedroom as a play area.

Should have rtft, ignore me!

My Ds has a tiny room. I have always said there is some alpha male in there and tries to take charge. Him having the smaller room would just reinstate. I do wish I could move the wall slightly though

I have the smaller bedroom here although it's still big enough for a double bed. My dc have more stuff and use their rooms more so made sense for me. My room is at the front of the house which I prefer as well.

It’s something we considered a while ago for the same reasons - as adults, we (dp and I anyway) don’t have as much ‘stuff’ as the dc and they all had smaller rooms than us with limited room for play and for having friends round so they ended up taking over a lot more of the house.
Dp and I did discuss it but ended up putting a loft conversion in and extending upstairs and down so we never needed to but had they been a bit older than they were, we probably would have done it until the teen years.
When we had our eldest 2, we all squeezed into a 1 bedroom flat. We had bought it before they were born and were saving for a deposit.
The dds shares the bedroom and dp and I were on a sofa bed in the front room. Uncomfortable but there’s no way us taking the bedroom would have worked. We all make sacrifices and compromises for our children.

We've just moved into 2 bed house and Ds (17) now has the bigger room. Very happy with mine. He has more people in his than I do.

Going to go against the grain here. I'd give the kids the bigger rooms because (and IF) they play in their rooms, whereas (and IF) I was just using my small room to sleep in and using the living room to hang out in. But that's just the way I'd do it because it wouldn't bother me, but if it bothers you don't do it

No way would I be giving up the best room for a 6yo.

One day the child will live in their own house and will have the biggest room. For now, it should be yours.

I've never had the biggest room because I've always preferred the middle room.

I'd save up and redo his room. He can help plan it. We put a cabin bed in our smallest room, awful. The room felt claustrophobic and so much stuff ended up underneath we ended up with mould. Eventually, we saved up and knocked the cupboard out over the thing to do with the stairs and had a bed built over or by a local carpenter. The room was transformed and there was plenty of storage under the bed for toys or clothes. We had a single pax wardrobe with a mirror front for clothes, the room looked so much better and feat twice the size.

My 2 dds share a room, so when dh died it made sense for me to move into the smaller room in a single bed and the 2 dds to have the larger room. Means they can fit up to 3 friends for a sleepover if the one not having the sleepover moves in with me for the night on a blow up bed next to my bed. Works for us and they don't treat me differently. They are pretty kind. Different circumstances from you though so I hope you find what works best for you

I think the adult should have the big room.

He isn't making the decision? I am. I'm being a parent and considering my children's needs

Except that on the say so of a 6 year old, who whinge about everything, you are actually considering whether to move yourself into a tiny bedroom.

Crazy.

Children really need to know their place. I cannot believe you would even consider giving up your bedroom. Are you trying to raise an entitled brat?

I'm perplexed - people believe parents should in all cases have the biggest room, just to make a point, standing empty most of the time? And DC with all their toys and friends should be squeezed into a mox room just to make sure they know their place?

@KatharinaRosalie
I really do. It is called the master bedroom for a reason. I believe it matters to show that there is a hierarchy in family relationships. I see how children speak to their parents and other adults, I seen parents pandering to their children, I see children expecting things they should be grateful for and it makes me sick. So yes, I really do think that the symbol matters. I understand that it may be an old-fashioned opinion, though.