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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have the biggest bedroom?!

152 replies

Anotheryearpasses · 23/02/2020 20:26

It's just me and two DC. Youngest has been complaining about having a tiny room and I've been trying to work out how to change it. A huge chunk of his room is taken up by built in storage. Not sure I have the money to have it all pulled out just yet but maybe in a year or so.

It seems like an obvious solution that I should swap rooms with him.

I love my bedroom though and sometimes we are all in my bed. No idea how I'd fit in the small room but as he gets older it'll probably mean more to him to have a bigger room.

OP posts:

coconut21 · 23/02/2020 21:49

I always think kids need bigger rooms than adults. More toys, place to play. Adults tend to just sleep in a room and have more recreation in the living room.

JustInCaseCakeHappens · 23/02/2020 21:49

I would give the biggest bedrooms to the children. They have more stuff and it's nice they have their own space.

As the adult, you have your bedroom and the living room. I don't go or use my own bedroom for anything else than sleep.

Streamside · 23/02/2020 21:51

I always remember the horrified look on my children's faces when they went to see halls of residence rooms. A while away for you but a small bedroom will do him no harm.

SleepingStandingUp · 23/02/2020 21:51

Adults tend to just sleep in a room and have more recreation in the living room.
Well op might get a partner and want to have sex not in the family sofa...

ActualHornist · 23/02/2020 21:54

When he’s a grown up he gets to choose who gets which bedroom. At the moment, it’s up to you to make the choice.

RedRed9 · 23/02/2020 21:54

Do not get an adult cabin bed just so he can occasionally play in a bigger room.

MummySharn · 23/02/2020 21:56

Is he able to play in his room? If he is then I wouldn’t swap

Muddlingalongalone · 23/02/2020 21:57

I'm planning to give dd1 the choice when my 2 split up again in a couple if years when she goes to secondary.
3rd bed has space for double bed/wardrobe/dressing table but not a lot else. It will suit me fine.
Key thing is though that it is my decision.
At 6 suggest you make the best of the room or they share the big room, but you shouldn't sacrifice everything for kids. They'll survive & you need your sanity!

FunkyChunk · 23/02/2020 21:59

I'd keep the big room. In a few years he'll have much fewer toys and you'll be cramped into a single bed for no reason

Patchworkpatty · 23/02/2020 22:01

Actually I did exactly this. We had three bedrooms two double and a box room that was just big enough for my bed and bedside table. (Built in wardrobe) . I gave up my double because they were at an age of playing in bedrooms and friends for sleepovers and without a playroom didn't want bloody Lego all over the sitting room.

We swapped back when youngest got to the age of not playing anymore and just laying on bed watching laptop and studying. It worked well for us.

EggysMom · 23/02/2020 22:02

DB and I used to swap bedrooms regularly, say 6m or a year each turn, so that we both had the big bedroom and the tiny boxroom in cycles. Whoever had the bigger room had to have the sofabed in their room as well, and give up the room if visitors were staying.

whattodo2019 · 23/02/2020 22:12

I would swap. Little ones have so many toys. It might help de clutter the downstairs He they have more room upstairs.
I know it's tough decision so you must do what feels right for you xx

Oysterbabe · 23/02/2020 22:14

I'm just trying to picture my parents face if I'd suggested they took my tiny bedroom 😂
Nope, the adult gets the best room in the house imo.

aSofaNearYou · 23/02/2020 22:15

I think it would set a bad precedent for you to give up your bedroom, as the parent.

Boireannachlaidir · 23/02/2020 22:18

He's 6 and you're even asking..? Please don't pander to him.

Grumpelstilskin · 23/02/2020 22:24

I don't suppose he is paying the rent... Parents do not need to put their comfort aside to humour a small child.

AhNowTed · 23/02/2020 22:27

A 6 year old does not get to decide or demand anything.

You're the parent. Do not pander to this nonsense.

Original poster

Anotheryearpasses · 23/02/2020 22:28

Perhaps my opening post was badly worded. He didn't ask to swap, it's something I'm considering. Of course it's my decision.

Must admit though, I find it difficult to relate to the idea of I get the best because I'm the adult.

OP posts:

MyNameHasBeenTaken · 23/02/2020 22:30

How old is the other child?
Is it possible for them to have bunk beds in the small room, just for sleep. Then have the bigger room as a play room?
Wardrobes in big room if needed?

Original poster

Anotheryearpasses · 23/02/2020 22:32

I thought of that but there is a big age gap, doesn't really work.

OP posts:

BrieAndChilli · 23/02/2020 22:37

See I think that children use thier bedrooms a lot more than an adult. When they are primary age they can play in thier bedroom/leave thier Lego out for days. And when they are teens do homework, have friends over, hang out and listen to music etc etc
As an adult I go to my bedroom at bedtime and sleep, get up and then that’s it for the rest of the day.
We have a 3 bed and the 2 boys share. If my and DH ever split up I wouldn’t hesitate to give the kids all a bedroom each and I would sleep downstairs.

Questioningeverything · 23/02/2020 22:45

Stuff that!! I’d not be swapping my room.
When dc2 came I worked out the configuration and how best two beds would fit in each room. Either worked. So I worked out which room would be best for me and my king size bed (I upgraded from a double)

Turns out my dc get the room with additional storage that’s bigger but an awkward shape that doesn’t fit a king size easily 😂 my bed totally was the deciding factor 😂

Would i heck be taking a smaller room for my kids to upgrade. They can play downstairs or have a bed that’s high with space underneath to play.

But it’s your house, you get the ultimate say.
Not sure how to vote for your AIBU

strawberrylipgloss · 23/02/2020 22:50

I swap my kids rooms every year. They all have neutral walls and personalize things would accessories like posters to make it theirs.

I grew up in a family where oldest got biggest room (I'm the oldest) but think that's unfair unless the younger ones are babies or the big room is being shared.

I have the master bedroom and my kids would never ask to have my room tbh. FWIW I also have the biggest bed. It's the only instance really where I prioritize myself over the kids

Original poster

Anotheryearpasses · 23/02/2020 22:51

That's what I was thinking BrieAndChilli.... I remember hanging out a lot in bedrooms with friends as a child/teen.

I do quite enjoy time in my bedroom, especially when DC with their dad I will watch a movie in bed and enjoy a lazy lie in. But I will definitely review this as DC get a bit older and weigh up their needs too.

I think the idea needs to go on hold for a white.

I didn't intend to have the voting turned on!

OP posts:

M0mmyneedswine · 23/02/2020 22:55

I have the small room as dc have much more stuff and i only use the room to sleep, it can fit a double bed though i wouldnt if i had to have a single

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