aibu to tell friend she's probably poisoned DH?

[PineappleDanish]

Out for dinner at friends' last night. Starter was mussels in a creamy sauce - one of DH's favourites. All of us ate it. Tasted fine. We've eaten mussels lots of times in the past, no allergies, experienced enough to tell if something tastes "off". All good.

DH this morning has symptoms which strongly indicate food poisoning. Strongly suspect the mussels, although it's weird that he's ill and I'm fine.

WIBU to text friend and say "thanks for lovely night but DH chained to the loo, just thought you should know"?

I think you run the risk of upsetting her for no good reason TBH! You have no way of knowing what the problem is for sure .You will probably make an awkward atmosphere between you all .

I once got food poisoning from shellfish and my husband had the same dish and was fine. I had a day and a half in hospital. He even ate half of mine! Either he had already had whatever bug caused it and was immune, or there was only one dodgy cockle and I ate it.

We complained to the restaurant and they accepted it was their fault (tests backed this up). They offered us a free meal, which we declined.

If I'd been ill after eating at a friend's house I wouldn't tell them. However, I would be very careful what I ate there in the future.

I'd probably mention in a lighthearted way that he's not feeling great

No, I wouldn't do that either, op. Not even if you put 'Dh has been chained to the toilet (Lighthearted)'!

Do not mention it. Why would you????

I love mussels and always ate them until a few years ago they made me ill. Thought it was a one off but every time since I have tried them I am ill again. You can develop a sensitivity. It doesn't mean you ate a bad one.

I'm another one who used to love mussels but can no longer eat them. Age 30, they suddenly gave me symptoms similar to food poisoning every time I ate them.

The meal just didn't agree with him.

Avocado doesn't agree with me - the craps are absolutely unreal afterwards and I feel so sick. I had to eat it twice to find out that it was that that did it to me! never EVER again!

It sounds like you're trying to blame her.

I wouldn’t. What would you be trying to achieve?

Seriously you dont stand such a nasty rude message. Yabu. If its food posioning you all have it. In which case she know. Sounds like your dh has a bug if you dont have it. If you both get it i wouldnt text. If anything id mention it in passing in a few weeks time but probably let it go. Depends on what the friendship is like

OMG "Cramps!" but yeah that works too

Hope your friend isn’t the Mumsnetter on the thread the other week asking about what people thought about cooking mussels at dinner parties.

It could quite easily have been something else he ate earlier.

And of course the one bad mussel. A few years ago there was around 30 of us eating the same food. Four of us got food poisoning. Unfortunately, the host did get to know and was mortified. But these things happen. Even professionals sometimes get it wrong.

If it's down to one dodgy mussel then it's not your friends fault. I made mussels for myself and DP once. I checked them thoroughly yet he was violently I'll and I was fine.

ill

And your DH could be sick from anything he's eaten in the last 48 hours. I was really poorly once after not washing bagged salad.

But why do you want to tell her?

It won't make him better, will it? Nobody else was sick. She knows what she's doing. And it could be any number of things!

Don't say anything to your friend, Pineapple. Nobody else, from what you said, has food poisoning. People have digestive upsets for all sorts of reasons. Your friend will feel awful if you blame her food. If everyone who ate there was taken ill that would be quite different.

Shell fish - molluscs and crustaceans - are dodgy things at the best of times. It's beyond me why anyone wants to eat them when there are far more wholesome things to eat and the way some of them are cooked is awful.

I once vomited the morning after I'd eaten mussels and I was sure they didnt agree

My friends were fine

Poisoned your Dh.

Get a grip

Your proposed message is incredibly shit. Don't send it.

And no, likely not any kind of food poisoning if everyone else is OK.

This country...

What’s “lighthearted” (I hate that word, it seems to be shorthand for “I can say what I like with impunity and if you don’t like it you just don’t have a sense of humour”) about accusing someone of poisoning you?

No!

As in no - don't send that message. What is the point?

If everyone else is fine, then it’s likely it wasn’t her cooking at all, but more likely something else he ate in the preceding 48 hours or before.

Really texting her to say “you likely poisoned my husband, but I don’t really know for sure and I’m fine, so it could be something else, but I fancy blaming you” isn’t really a good look op.

What you going to say when she says well everyone else is fine, so it’s likely something else? Argue she’s to blame because you don’t like her?

You said it yourself. If the mussels were dodge, why aren’t you both ill?

Because no one shares a mussel. They aren't all going to be dodgy. it only takes one to make people sick.

Can't believe so many people think it's unlikely to be food poisoning. Mussels are well-known to cause it and it is usually because the person cooking them doesn't know how to check that they're okay. I rarely eat them for that reason.