To ask What is the wildest rumour you have heard about yourself?

[FunkyTime]

I heard a rumor that I kissed another girl at a school disco in primary school

My husband groomed me..... 😂 I was 30 when we met and he is only 7yrs older than me

That I was caught having sex with a colleague in the toilet at the Christmas party - this rumour circulated 2 years after I left the business- not sure why 🤷🏻‍♀️. I'd work there for over 10 years and never attended a work's Christmas party I was well known for being the only senior who never went .

That I’d had a four (or five)-some with some good male friends. I can’t quite remember everyone who was apparently there.
According to legend, one of them said ‘no this is like rape she’s too drunk to consent’ and left. So the rumour is also essentially accusing the others of gang rape.
Categorically didn’t happen in the slightest.

Someone (and I know who because I overheard her once) went round the school telling everyone that I was a lesbian. I'm not but I didn't deny it. It showed me that some people started distancing themselves, which I found homophobic so I didn't want to socialize with such people anyway because being a lesbian nothing to be ashamed of.

I had a boyfriend at the time as well, which many people knew. I wonder how they figured I was a lesbian anyway. What's the male equivalant of a beard?

One of my undergraduate students told me there was a rumour I used to be a ballerina but couldn’t continue due to cancer.

Admittedly I was very thin, and had just left a job that only allowed me to see the sun for a single hour a day, but WTF?

I had the same Dzundza, it did really open my eyes to how horribly homophobic people can be. The rumour came out of the simple action of deciding to research and talk publicly about the effects of AIDS in all members of society at the time it was seen as a curse only destined to gay people.

I am not gay, but that experience had left me very willing to stand up and challenge any homophobic comment even when is more than 20 years that they are not directed at me.

At college that I was a lesbian and simultaneously that the only reason I was friends with one of my friends was because I fancied her boyfriend. Also at a different stage in my life a boss started a rumour that I'd slept with him.

That I gave birth. To be fair, I did gain a massive amount of weight in a short time. Could not convince people that I did not. Why would I lie about that?

That I had left my husband and run off with my kids.I was in the Hospital with my son who had been diagnosed with Neuroblastoma.My other so was with his grandparents.

In work that I was a lesbian with my best friend and we lived together.

I was actually seeing my male manager but we couldn't tell anyone lol.

My sil told my BF that DH and I couldn't have a baby so she had offered to be a surrogate for us.

What I didn't understand is why tell someone's best friend that? She was genuinely surprised that it got back to me.

That I was a personal friend of Prince Charles.

I've never even met him, and as a staunch republican, I doubt I'd be someone he felt friendly towards!

That I was the local drug dealer.
I had just moved into a new property, at the time the neighbours noticed me driving in and out of my street during the early hours. The reality was I was often visiting my terminally ill father in hospital / in a hospice. Very nasty rumours circulated at the time.

That I'd laid on a kitchen floor at a party and 4 men had sex with me. I didn't. The girl who started it knew her boyfriend was trying to get me to go out with him. Her floor was bloody filthy.

I was accused of reporting my friends for cheating on their GCSE coursework. Got a lot of silent treatment from them and bullying from others before someone told me "what do you expect considering what you did"

I was accused of being a junkie for showing up to an event hung over. I must have really looked like crap.

Also, just earlier this morning on here, I was accused of being two people on one thread just to "derail" it and "cause a scene" My first time being reported.
The "other me" very kindly pm'd me to confirm we weren't living in an alternate universe

I'd had a pretty nasty car accident a couple of days before and I was in the post room at work and overheard one of the receptionists (she was the council gossip) telling her colleagues that it was an awful accident and I was quite badly injured (I had whiplash which smarted a bit) and was going to be off work for weeks. I stuck my head around the corner and said "I'm back!!"

Why she says any of it I'll never know, the chances of her colleagues seeing me around the building were I'd say, 100%

That certain employees of mine are acting as "spies" to spy on the other employees.
LOLOL - spy on them for what purpose? so I can know what lunch they ate? where they do their weekly shop? what films they watch? Yeah- such valuable and useful information! eye roll

That I was an extra in a pop video. TBF, this person really did look like me and I had a very similar and distinctive coat. I was asked about it lots of times and began to wonder whether I should just start ‘admitting’ it.

I apparently associated with a gang of well known thieves and drug dealers in our area and my ex was a violent "gangster" who would beat up my new partner if he found out I was with him.

Neither me nor my ex ever took drugs, or dealt them, in fact I couldn't even tell you how to get some anywhere (I'm the sort of person who would end up getting arrested even trying to buy weed for the first time) and while my ex was a total wanker to me with years of EA, he never once laid a finger on anyone.

Thankfully the new partner didn't believe what he'd been told as we've been together for many happy years and are now married. It was just the first part of a campaign of jealous rumours from someone trying to split us up though.

That i was dead! It was my first few weeks at uni, i'd been at a Freshers' party in another college, and fallen over a wall. The drop on the part of the wall i'd fallen over was only a couple of feet, but further along, the drop was about 20 feet onto stone slabs.... apparently someone had seen me fall and assumed i'd been killed. Atfer that, people came up to me in the street for about two terms, saying that they'd thought i was dead!

That I slept with my cousins boyfriend. I absolutely did not!! Barely even spoke two words to him at the time he was seeing my cousin! They split up and she ‘forgave’ me even though I protested my innocence. She said ‘it’s ok. I know you did but we will just move on now...’ I really didn’t but we never spoke of it again and carried on with our already very distant anyway relationship

That I had left my hometown to join a commune, had become a drug addict and had died
And that, dear Mumsnetters, was started by my lovely mother.

Imagine people's shock when I added them on Facebook and I live up the country with two DCs, my DP of 20 years and run my own business. I usually reply with "rumours of my death have been greatly exaggerated".

Honestly, I've had it from about 30 people. The woman's a loon.

That our area was left without a policeman because he'd been caught shagging the community centre manager; apparently his wife kicked up such a stink that the top brass were forced to move him

This was told to me by a hairdresser ... just a shame she didn't realise I was that centre manager

I finished A-levels left school, and was looking forward to teacher training college. Unfortunately, the start of term was delayed by building works, so I wanted a temporary job to bridge the gap and earn a little.
The perfect opportunity arose; a distant relative was back in the UK visiting with her American husband, a doctor, and needed help with two small children and a newborn baby; she didn't want to employ someone in a permanent post, so it suited us both just fine for me to act as a sort of short-term au pair.
She and her little family returned to the USA, I left for college, all fine.
Then I went back to a school reunion, and was puzzled by the blank looks I got from former friends, until one of them enlightened me.
Apparently, I had been swept off my feet by a dashing American doctor, become pregnant, and after a hastily arranged wedding, went off to live in the States...…
They seemed disappointed by my prosaic stay in Walsall; I was perfectly happy, if a bit baffled.