To ask for the best advice you got for newborn babie?

[Winterwoollies]

Ok, ok, don’t yell at me, I know this should go in another area, but I want to tap into the full Mumsnet knowledge pool and we all know this is the most highly trafficked area of Talk.

I read a comment from someone about soothing night-time screamy babies with colic the other day and it prompted me to start a notes file with good newborn baby tips. It involved putting them upright in a baby sling and going for a really good walk before bed to soothe reflux. It seemed worth remembering!

So, with that in mind, does anyone have any nuggets of useful, even obscure, advice for newborn babies and a newborn parent?

I have an unexpected baby due in the summer and am keen for some sisterly (or brotherly) advice.

Thank you!

Again, please don’t yell.

Following due first baby in June

A MN classic - vests don’t have to be pulled up over their heads (when the nappy has leaked) they will stretch and can be pulled down their body.

Babies that age are highly portable. If you’re physically up to it, go up and about and do your normal thing. If they scream in the pram just pop them back into the sling. They’ll probably enjoy it when they get older.

Don’t spend time stressing about getting a 4 week old baby into a routine and ‘teaching them’ about night and day. Their circacadian rhythm takes about three months to develop anyway. So again, portability above all else. It’ll be much harder to do that when they get mobile.

Good luck

Make sure the flaps round the legs on nappies are pulled out.

You can’t spoil them with cuddles.. If you want to hold your baby do it, it’s your baby.

Warm wet facecloth like a blanket over their belly n legs in the bath helps keep them warm n chilled out.

Hot water bottle in the Moses basket before you pop them down can stop them realising they’ve been put down. Obviously remove it before you put the baby in.

Keep night feeds (any time after a certain time; say 10pm) quiet and with dim lights to stop baby waking up too much. This has made a huge difference for us with baby no 2. And try to get out of the house every single day, even if it's just for a stroll around the block. For both your sake and theirs.

Do your pelvic floor exercises while feeding 2 or 3 times a day. The NHS Squeezy app is really good for that.

Using reusable wipes and warm water makes for a less unpleasant change with little or no crying, and is more gentle on newborn skin than wet wipes.

Always burp the baby from day one. Anyone who says breastfed babies don't need to be winded is talking rubbish.

Its ok to put baby down so you can shower/brush you hair/brush teeth etc.

Remember that once you've fed, winded and changed a newborn but they're still crying they're probably just tired. Sounds obvious but it's easy to forget that just holding, rocking and soothing baby is still doing something. After all the above it's all that's needed sometimes.

Never wake a sleeping baby.

My mother told me this ( potentially dangerous) advice.

Don't worry if you're out and about and baby cries. Ignore looks from sour faced old biddies...babies cry and I think that fresh air every day is so important!

If it's your first baby - sleep when the baby sleeps!

I did NOT follow this advice and boy did I and all around me suffer for it. Granted my PNA was the main factor for not sleeping but looking back I wish I took the opportunity to sleep when I could. Severe sleep deprivation and postnatal anxiety / postnatal ANYthing do not mix well.

This is all perfect, thank you! Keep them coming xx

The Infacol bottle top with integrated dropper/pipette also fits onto Calpol bottles

Remember to point baby boy bits downwards in the nappy. I went through about 10 vests a night at first with DS1.

Won't forget a lovely midwife advising me to enjoy my baby!

No practical advice but a mantra that really helped me was to remember that pretty much everything is just a phase. So yes you might go weeks having an evening witching hour, or baby hating the bath, or struggles feeding, or baby waking constantly at night but it will all change eventually and seem like a distant memory (often without anything you have done/can do to change it!)

God I have loads:

• Don't worry if you hate the first weeks and feel like you're missing the 'magical' shit people tell you about. I'm not a baby person but loving the toddler stage, everyone is different.
• If breastfeeding doesn't work give the baby a bottle and don't feel guilty about it.
• Never ever turn a light on during a night feed!

- Don't read the milestones too closely or worry about them. DD never seemed to do anything when she was supposed to and is a perfectly happy healthy normally developed 1 year old.

• Don't read too many books, they're all bullshit and every baby is different.
• Just when you think you've got your shit together, parenting has this habit of biting you on the arse. All you can do is roll with it.
• The sleep deprivation is the worst bit of parenting - anything you can do to get them sleeping through the night will be worth it!
• Ignore anyone who showers you in negativity. My mum did nothing but criticise and scrutinise every move I made and I ended up chronically second guessing myself whenever she was around.

Napisan for stains and germ killing!

Always line the change mat with a muslin folded under their bottom. Lift their clothes up away from the muslin (I.e. clothes under their back and muslin under their bottom, not touching each other). That way when they wee and poo after you've just wiped them (which they will), you can just wash the muslin and the outfit stays clean and dry.

Reusable nappies leak less than disposables

Only change at night if you need to i.e. they have pooed

Don’t feel like you should be doing something with a newborn e.g. baby groups, work up to it and don’t put loads of pressure on yourself to do something everyday etc. You will in fact be busy already just learning about your baby and meeting both of your needs - quite often that’s enough!

Have somewhere safe and ready to put the baby down if there’s a knock at the door and somewhere safe you can put them while you have a shower. Baby chairs are great for this.

Just based on your comment, babies must always be upright in a sling!!! There is a severe risk of suffocation otherwise.

Breastfeeding is horrendous for the first few weeks BUT if you can battle through that, get supply and latch sorted it's the easiest thing in the world after that. But you'll probably need support so if you want to bf, know where the local groups are before you give birth.

Get tongue tie checked. Don't trust anyone but a qualified lactation consultant to diagnose tongue tie. GPs and midwives generally know nothing about tongue tie.

• Aldi nappies are brilliant. We have Pampers in the cupboard as emergency reserves only.
• Vaseline to keep little twinkles pointing down into the nappy
• warm water and cotton pads to clean bums is far kinder than baby wipes. I only use those when out and about
• muslin cloth under their head in the Moses basket or pram is easier to change than a fresh sheet when they are sick
• don’t put them down straight after a feed. Give it a little while to burp/be sick and settle. You’d get uncomfortable scranning a big meal then lying straight down wouldn’t you?
• it’s funny when they pee on you, shit the bath, pull your hair, spew all over the gorgeous new outfit you just finished the poppers on seconds before. Honest it is. You have to roll with this stuff or your stress levels will rocket.

Congratulations OP

If they get attached to a comforter, buy multiple so you always have a clean one. I rotate them so they all wear out the same, and I can wash them. DS has 3.

Fill your freezer with easy to cook food before baby arrives and get lots of yummy snacks to nibble on if you are planning to breastfeed.

If you can afford it hire a cleaner who will also do laundry/bed linen.

It's not wind, it's tiredness!