...to think the Samaritans isn't always the best intervention for those in crisis?

[AwkwardPigeon]

I'm just getting sick of the half-hearted attempts to help people suffering with their mental health on social media, all of these prescriptive tweets and FB posts with the addendum of the Samaritans phone number.

As a society we really need to be doing more than just directing all suicidal people to the Samaritans, I'm not doubting it's a useful lifeline to some in a time of need but it definitely has its limitations. I question its effectiveness in comparison to other interventions like face-to-face regular counselling sessions which unfortunately there are very long waiting lists for under the NHS and sadly many people if they were suicidal would (and probably do) take their own lives before getting a referral.

The Samaritans service have helped me in the past to a degree when, although not suicidal, I was struggling considerably with my feelings around specific events however I did get the impression they were scared to give any actual advice. Another time I rang them the most fed up-sounding man ever answered the phone and I just hung up because I sensed I wouldn't be able to open up to him. I think it's a lottery like many other services in that whom you get through to depends on the quality of help you receive and the level of optimism you feel once the call ends.

Also, call me cynical but I just think it's so easy for individuals to push the burden onto the Samaritans when we shouldn't really be relying on a charity largely funded by donations from the public to fix everyone's mental health problems and prevent suicides. There are so many other agencies that need to play a part too and us as individuals in helping those we know rather than signposting them to a charity to speak to a stranger. Am I being too harsh?!

Please please be careful what you are posting. If you don't think the Samaritans is the answer please put down what you think I is, so the desperate person reading this has an alternative and is not just shut down.

But who else is there?
my dd called them, she refuses to call them again.
I dont know what else to suggest?
the counselling waiting list has put her off, in fact they called her, she didnt answer, they discharged her

similarminimer If you are about to or have attempted suicide then the “answer” is to call 999.

Dyme I agree. They are not the answer to everything. Linking to them repeatedly just creates too high expectations of what they can do.

I totally agree with you! The cuts in MH funding is what has led to this... it's incredible the number of callers who used to tell me they were fobbed off and told 'just call Samaritans'.

Mehooha I never ever sat in silence on a call. It was a two way thing AFAIC

I have a work colleague who volunteered on tbe Samaritans helpline - he had a customer facing phone roll at my work. If he was half as good a volunteer on the phones as he was at work, you would be getting someone calm and full of empathy when you needed to hear it.

Please please be careful what you are posting. If you don't think the Samaritans is the answer please put down what you think I is, so the desperate person reading this has an alternative and is not just shut down.

I have. 111 or in severe crisis 999. I have also suggested a novel idea for a dedicated emergency response service that operates like the ambulance or police but is dedicated to MH.

I honestly think that the people who recommend them have never ever had to call them

Completely true

The OP said she rang them "whilst not suicidal... struggling with some issues around some event" they are not a general counselling service.

Well i phoned them and i can tell you they helped me, my partner had died in an accident and i was very close to killing myself.
They pointed me to CRUSE and they provided specific counselling, first over the phone and then face to face.

A friend of mine became a counsellor after hearing of my experiences, not only do they get time wasters they also get people wanking, winding them up with false tragedies and they have to listen to this crap just incase the caller has MH issues (very likely) but is about to harm themselves.

TBF sick to death of people fucking moaning about lack of decent public health services whilst at the same time voting tory for lower taxes.

message slightly edited by MNHQ to remove detail, sorry, it was either that or remove the post altogether

I recommend them and I have personally called them many times including when I was experiencing a MH crisis. Just talking to someone can help on some occasions. Sometimes we need to talk out loud about the thoughts that are racing around our heads and feeling heard is what is needed. At other times it is not what is needed and not sufficient and assessment and intervention from a MH service (not a listening service) is what is needed. Calling 111 or 999 is what is needed at that point (or the Crisis Team if you are being supported by them).

I have honestly found them to be very helpful and will continue to recommend them (but I also understood the boundaries and limitations of a listening line)

I called them many years ago and was put off by the lack of two-way interaction. The person who answered the phone said hello and then asked straight away if I was suicidal. Then when I said no (I was depressed), I felt like I had been wrong to call.

However, I have used their email service since and found that to be very helpful. The email responses made me feel listened to.

has anyone had any experience with SHOUT
www.giveusashout.org/get-help/

I've asked MN to have a look at this thread. I'm very worried it could be very off putting to someone right now who's mustered up the strength to lift the phone

EnidBlyton try looking on here for some resources:

www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/support-and-information/if-youre-having-difficult-time/other-sources-help/

And please persuade her to put herself back on the list for NHS assistance if you can’t afford private help. Some Trusts have a facility to self refer to talking therapy - can you check if that’s available in your area?

Can I also recommend Shout Text Service. I was a Samaritan for 10 years and one of my wonderful colleagues who I worked very closely with training new samaritans has finally left like me, and is now volunteering for them. She has a lot of good things to say about the service.

This is for anyone out there who is struggling. I haven't used 'Shout' but heard good reports that's all.

kateandme
We must have typed posts at the same time!

Yes... as above, my friend is volunteering with them.

Hillocrew - it might be more useful if you asked MN to read the feedback and to adjust who they signpost suicidal posters to here.
It's plugged at the end of every programme that deals with suicide. There's no end of recommendation for it. What there isn't, is them acting on negative feedback.

I don’t know... I called them twice, I was not absolutely desperate but there were a couple of traumatic things had just happened that I couldn’t talk to anyone else at that time of the night/day.

First time, I talked to a man who insisted I should feel comfortable with talking or better said having a proper monologue of what was happening in my life while he quietly listened (or finish doing whatever he was doing at the other end of the line) and only contributed by asking me to keep talking, they are here to help but not really having a conversation with me, it was a monologue that I cut in 3 minutes because I felt as no contribution to the conversation was made by him. It was absolutely bloody useless, it made me feel much worse... You are right... talking to Alexa would have been far more comforting/distracting.

Second time around, the woman kept asking questions that shown she was actively listening, questions that make you think about the situation and help you by grounding you a bit. She was great, but the guy was so weird and dreadful I have mixed feelings about them.

Hillocrew Equally I think it is incredibly important that someone calls the right service for what they need. As PP have said, it’s important that people don’t feel somehow broken or worthless if the Samaritans hasn’t been able to help them.

Rosemist same here, been on both ends of the phone. As a caller, it was good to know someone was there, and being able to call in the middle of the night was particularly appreciated. As a volunteer, I know from personal experience that the branch where I worked was helpful to many, many people. And the sex calls were sh*tty but I reckoned at least they weren’t frightening a woman living alone. But ohhhh, having to do a normal day’s work after a Samaritan night shift!

So, it helps some people and not others. But just STFU those in the public eye passing the buck to Samaritans to bear the burden on this country’s mushrooming mental health problems! I’ve gone on to qualify as a psychotherapist and have been offering lower cost therapy for years (still beyond many people’s budgets, but I have to charge something to cover my bills and there just aren’t enough NHS counsellors) What needs to happen is a massive overhaul of mental health services with funded therapy available within a short time of referral, proper support for mental health teams (crisis and otherwise) and community initiatives for local support. As usual, it’s down to money.

Roussette

@bellinisurge

“Samaritans is a charity not a "service" paid for out of the public purse. Like RNLI.”

From the RNLI webpage page,

“ Our lifeboat service receives no UK government funding and less than 2% of the RNLI’s total funding comes from government sources.

As a charity, 94% of our total income comes from donations and so our lifesaving service relies on the generosity of our supporters. Read more about how your support helps.”

I know it’s not the point of the thread, but the RNLI is not paid out of the public purse.

I hope also hope this thread doesn’t put of other people who need help to speak to the Samaritans, or other organisations.

I hadn't heard of Shout, but will use them in future. Thanks for mentioning.

I don’t think people realise how shit help for mental health is. In my area you go to the gp and ask for help and they give you a little business card for Wellbeing service, which is a number to ring where they then do a long questionnaire on the phone with you “how likely are you to hurt yourself 1-5, how much enjoyment do you get out of everyday activities 1-5” etc. Or you can do these online. They then use the responses to decide which help to offer. I’ve had different responses when I’ve used this - to an online CBT course which was absolutely useless as it was so impersonal and then a counsellor would ring me once every 6-8 weeks to check I was ok (alive). Felt completely pointless. And then I’ve had them try to make me go to group therapy sessions - which is the last thing I’d want! (I know some people may like this and that’s great for them). It’s seemingly impossible to get access to a proper counsellor 1 to 1 or a psychotherapist. The one time they did offer me a 1 to 1 appointment was at 3pm on a weekday when part of my issue is that I am a carer to severely disabled child with no outside family help and a dh who has severe mental health issues. I rang to see if I could change the appointment as it clashed with my ds returning home from his complex needs school and I was told they couldn’t change the appointment- they could only discharge me (!) and then I’d have to go through the whole referral / questionnaire process again to get back into the system! Utterly crazy and I haven’t had the energy or motivation to re refer again.

@Hillocrew
I completely agree

They really helped me in a really difficult time

Thank you @Dyrne

@mehooha, I’m sorry that was your experience. Samaritans try to listen more than talk, but shouldn’t be so silent that you feel they might have gone away. Samaritans isn’t helpful to everyone, but you should be able to feel that there’s a human being on the end of the phone engaging with and listening to you. Hope you found support elsewhere.