Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aggressive man in cinema

173 replies

earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 13:44

Just went to the pictures with my kids. It was a "sit anywhere" screening so we sat in the best seats which you can pay more for - usually nobody pays extra and anyone sits there, especially in a not busy screening like it was today.

A man & 2 boys said we were in his seats (at the end of the row) so we were moving down (the rest of the row was empty anyway - we ended up in the middle in better seats). As he went past while I was still sitting - but it was clear we were moving as my kids had already stood up, I was just gathering stuff - he hit me in my knees with his knees several times on purpose! My son saw him do it too. It actually hurt quite a bit, i have bad knees. It wasn't an accident.

AIBU to think that was unnecessary?! I accept it is wrong to sit in the premier seats, except the cinema don't care and we moved when he said we were in his seats.

OP posts:
Keanuismine · 17/02/2020 17:41

He assaulted you and you should report it. I was assaulted by a man who hit me on the back of the head when I asked him to be quiet and when I told staff they advised me to refund my ticket and leave quietly as someone once got attacked in the car park. I told the member of staff he was victim blaming and called 999 in front of him. The police came and removed the man and took the cctv footage. He was cautioned and banned from the cinema. Please report him.

BemidjiMinnesota · 17/02/2020 17:43

This thread is INSANE. The OP was kneed by a man in front of her children and so many posters are acting like she deserved it for sitting in the wrong seat.

I know some people love coming onto AIBU just to scrap but this is ridiculous.

OP would you consider reporting it to the cinema now? They might have cameras and a visit from the police might stop this man from being violent to any other woman with her children.

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 17:47

Thank you. Yes I will see if I can contact the cinema. It is like a ghost town down there usually but someone must be the manager. I doubt they have cameras but I might be surprised!

OP posts:
Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 17:49

The only contact options are live chat, which closed at 5pm, or post them a letter. I will go on live chat tomorrow.

OP posts:
LilyJade · 17/02/2020 18:17

OP you'll be doing the right thing to report this.

Glad you are not like me as I have a short fuse & would probably have tripped him up or worse & would have got myself in trouble.

Many women are too scared to respond straight away to aggressive men & I can fully understand why.
To be honest the most sensible thing to do in these kinds of circumstances is to remain calm & get help at the time from an authority figure (manager, or even police).

OneMoreLight · 17/02/2020 18:38

You don't deserve to be hurt by someone at all. He should have just asked you to move.

This is the main reason I get to gigs and the cinema early though to make sure I get in the right seats in good time. You'd be surprised how many people sit in the wrong place by accident.

malmi · 17/02/2020 18:52

Just because the regular seats are 'sit anywhere' doesn't mean you can upgrade yourself to a premium seat. They are not 'sit anywhere', they are paid for and allocated. Next time try sitting in the projectionist's chair and see what happens when you tell him it's 'sit anywhere'.

It is frustrating to pay for a premium product and then find that others are just helping themselves for nothing.

But he shouldn't have assaulted you, no.

Rosebel · 17/02/2020 19:01

I don't condone what this man did but why are people saying call the police? He knocked her knees, it's not like he beat her up. I'm not sure what the cinema can do now so I'm not sure I'd bother to report it.

hazell42 · 17/02/2020 19:03

The premier seats are always numbered and are never sit anywhere
He paid extra you didnt
He shouldn't have hit you, but he had every right to ask you to move

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 19:18

Ha ha I think I would need a time machine to sit in the projectionists chair!

All the seats in our very old Odeon are numbered on every row. My tickets said Row Seat . Sorry I misunderstood. The premier seats are in the middle but not noticeably better.

Yes he had a right to ask me to move if I say in his seats! That is why we moved. I didn't dispute that.

I think other cinemas have better premier seats than ours. As I said already, I am surprised anyone would pay for them for Spies In Disguise at 11am. There were loads of seats just as good. I let my kids choose where to sit. Sorry!

OP posts:
dayswithaY · 17/02/2020 19:20

He bashed into her knees in a narrow space with no lighting. He'll just say it was an accident and the police will have wasted time over a petty stand off that no one can prove. Chalk it up to experience, no real harm done.

Keanuismine · 17/02/2020 19:21

Go to the cinema. Ask for the manager. Tell him you are reporting an assault and give him the time and the day. Write an account now and date it. That twat will be shoving and assaulting women, elderly people and people with disabilities regularly and needs stopping. Think of what you are doing as a public service. You need to visit and see a manager so it goes in the incident book - live chat won't have the same effect. The manager can check the cctv at that time and you can re watch it and contact the police. Most people pay by card so they probably can identify him.

dayswithaY · 17/02/2020 19:31

Exactly how can they identify this man by his card details alone?

Biancadelrioisback · 17/02/2020 19:42

I doubt entirely that the manager will even watch the CCTV let alone let OP and contact the police...

Valleychalet · 17/02/2020 19:51

Our cinema is the same OP! For films that aren't new (seems to normally be kids films) you can sit anywhere, but you can also book specific seats if you don't book online and buy them at the cinema, but they're all the same price, whether it's reclining or premier or normal. It isn't a great system but it usually doesn't cause any issues when I've been.

Yesterdayforgotten · 17/02/2020 20:19

OP I wouldn't like to go to your cinema; what with people sitting in other people's seats, rodents running wild, shabby fixtures, angry men knocking knees, the Mary celeste when it comes to staff and I bet the place is drafty too Shock
I would prefer to stay at home and rent a movie through my tv...Smile

RogueV · 17/02/2020 20:55

YANBU op, there are some bizarre responses on this thread! You were physically assaulted, bet he wouldn’t have kneed you if you were a bloke!!

I would have reported it to the police tbh

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 21:28

Now I never said it was draughty! It's quite warm in there. Yes we could watch films on tv but have been stuck in all weekend with the storm and I was trying to think of somewhere we could go that suits kids aged 6 to 15. Yes it's a crap cinema but it's only 10 minutes drive and gave us something to do.

I checked the kids club prices and they are the same for standard and premier, so you can sit anywhere. I practically never go when it's not kids club - twice in the last many years.

I hadn't noticed the premier option when buying our tickets until I just looked. It was £2 extra for our film apparently for premier. As already said.... I don't know why anyone would pay that in a quite empty cinema with loads of seating available, when the seats aren't even fancier.

OP posts:
Yesterdayforgotten · 17/02/2020 22:05

At least they have the heating on
Yes it is nice to get out as you say. I hope that man doesnt frequent the cinema at the same time each week as it sounds like he might and that could be the same seat he books every week. I'd be sitting at the other end of the cinema but hopefully he won't be in your film again....

vhs95 · 17/02/2020 22:23

When I was 16 (many years ago!) a friend and I were sitting in our local fleapit watching something immemorable when a middle-aged man sitting next to me exposed himself. I nudged my friend and hit him hard on the knee with my umbrella (perhaps it wasn't his knee?) before we both scuttled out. We were too mortified to report it and I never even told my mum in case it was my fault. This was the swinging 60s 😁. OP, YANBU but the moment to deal with him has passed I think.

Jonb6 · 17/02/2020 22:31

Please report him, he assaulted you.

Comtesse · 17/02/2020 23:16

OP yanbu to be upset. The guy behaved like an ass. A good time to let your Inner Fishwife come to the surface and give him a mouthful. Seriously not on. At least shouting “hey stop that” might be good. I like @Keanuismine quick thinking I must say!

maddy68 · 17/02/2020 23:29

If he had booked those seats fair enough

atomicblonde30 · 17/02/2020 23:32

This thread is gross, so what you sat in his seat (allegedly) doesn't mean you deserve to be kneed by some aggressive pillock.

BootShakin · 17/02/2020 23:40

my 15 year old and 13 year olds say they always sit there. They haven't learned it from me

They also haven't learned "no, we haven't paid for those seats, you need to sit somewhere else" from you either, have they?

^^ This. He's wrong to hurt you but god I hate CFs like you. I always wonder who raise the twats who think they can do what they want, now I know.

Swipe left for the next trending thread