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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aggressive man in cinema

173 replies

earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 13:44

Just went to the pictures with my kids. It was a "sit anywhere" screening so we sat in the best seats which you can pay more for - usually nobody pays extra and anyone sits there, especially in a not busy screening like it was today.

A man & 2 boys said we were in his seats (at the end of the row) so we were moving down (the rest of the row was empty anyway - we ended up in the middle in better seats). As he went past while I was still sitting - but it was clear we were moving as my kids had already stood up, I was just gathering stuff - he hit me in my knees with his knees several times on purpose! My son saw him do it too. It actually hurt quite a bit, i have bad knees. It wasn't an accident.

AIBU to think that was unnecessary?! I accept it is wrong to sit in the premier seats, except the cinema don't care and we moved when he said we were in his seats.

OP posts:
amusedbush · 17/02/2020 15:12

I'm really struggling to picture how someone can repeatedly hit your knees with their knees - surely that looked ridiculous? And if you were in his seats, why was he walking past you? Surely he would wait for you to get up, then take the seat you were in?

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:14

To answer some questions! When I bought the tickets online, it said to sit anywhere. The premier seats are taller / in the middle. There are practically no staff in our Odeon, ever, they rarely even check tickets, never mind making you move. I let the kids choose where to sit... they always want to sit there and there was plenty of space - nobody but the 5 of us and the 3 of them in our row, and a few in the row behind. Cinema not full at all (we watched Spies In Disguise).

He came in at the far end of the row - we had come in that end and went all the way to the far end from the entrance to leave room for other people. So he was looking at seat numbers all along the row and then came in front of me and told us to move.

The way he hit my knees was he was stood directly in front of me while I was sitting to let him past (waiting to get up and move), with his knees in front of mine, then quickly alternated his knees to hit mine, definitely on purpose. He wasn't moving past, he didn't jostle me, I wouldn't have bothered posting for that. He kneed me aggressively as he was angry with me.

I didn't say anything because a) I was shocked, b) he was standing over me and clearly angry so intimidating, c) I was with my kids and not wanting to upset them and d) the trailers were on so it was dark and loud.

We did move - I didn't argue with him. I just said I thought my tickets said sit anywhere, and he said well these are mine. So we moved up. I can't imagine he sat at the end because he also had bad knees! His 2 kids sat at the end and he was nearest to me.

My knees hurt because he hurt me on purpose.

OP posts:
MyDcAreMarvel · 17/02/2020 15:15

Hit your knees with his ? That makes no sense . It was not sit anywhere was it, it was sit anywhere in the regular seats.

recordbox · 17/02/2020 15:15

So you were in his seat?

TabbyMumz · 17/02/2020 15:17

"usually nobody pays extra and anyone sits there,"
You dont know that though, do you? Unless everytime you've seen people sat there, you've asked them?
Clearly, hed paid more for them. I suspect it's a "sit anywhere, but not in the premier seats rule, as it is in our cinema. You were wrong sitting there. If he hit your knees on purpose, then he's wrong for doing that too.

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:19

At the end I said to my 13 year old, "that man hit my knees with his knees" and he said "yes I saw him, I wondered what you were going to do"... so yes it did look ridiculous and obvious that he was doing it on purpose.

It wasn't Stevenage! Shame there are more of these men around. It reminded me of the man on the plane punching the seat in front. Angry man.

Apologies for the terrible crime of sitting in the more expensive seats without paying for them! I didn't know anyone ever paid for them unless it was a new, popular film out.

OP posts:
TabbyMumz · 17/02/2020 15:19

Couldnt you have moved your knees to the side, if he was trying to pass?

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:21

I can't express any better how he hit my knees with his. It was like kicking me but with his knee caps onto my knee caps. I was sitting and he was standing directly in front of me.

OP posts:
cunningartificer · 17/02/2020 15:22

Don’t get the ‘deliberate’ hitting knees with knees. Is that all he did to be called aggressive? Seems odd to be so certain it was malicious when it’s easy to bump into people with limited space. Surely painful for him if he knees your knees hard enough to hurt (though can’t quite envisage the sitting/standing dynamic that clashes knees, sounds like the kind of thing that deserves an Attenborough commentary). Did you just jostle each other going past, perhaps? To be fair I think I’d be a little irritated if I’d paid more for seats and someone was in them. ‘Sit anywhere screening’ clearly isn’t quite true if he had booked.

ScarlettBlaize · 17/02/2020 15:22

He shouldn't have been physical with you, absolutely not.

It is taking the piss to sit in the premier/VIP seats when you haven't paid for them, and you know that.

I took my kids to see a big blockbuster family film recently, the cinema was nearly full, we'd paid for the VIP seats and there was a huge family in them, already stuffing themselves with tons of snack food before the trailers had even started.

They made a huge song and dance about moving, and left loads of crap behind all over the seats.

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:22

Of course i had moved to let him pass - he could have passed me. He was trying to hurt me in a way that he could pretend was accidental.

OP posts:
izzywizzygood · 17/02/2020 15:23

How dare he bash your knees! Regardless of the situation, he sounds like an absolute a*hole. Disgusting behaviour, and he should not have got away with it.

You moved from the seats, was a mistake. What a horrid man.

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:24

It wasn't jostling. It was alternate knees, like 12345 direct hit onto my knees. I was surprised too as it was so weird. It wasn't an accident.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 17/02/2020 15:25

What is your AIBU here OP?

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:25

Yeah maybe we shouldn't sit in those seats but the cinema was not full at all. There were loads of other premier seats so we moved into them.

OP posts:
TheAugusta · 17/02/2020 15:26

What a disgraceful man, sorry that happened to you OP. It’s really upsetting when someone is needlessly vile to you- what on earth can they get out of it?

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:27

I guess AIBU to be upset that a man deliberately hurt me in a weird way because we sat in his seats but moved when he told us to!

OP posts:
midwestspring · 17/02/2020 15:30

He absolutely shouldn't have been physically aggressive with you.

You are being a CF using premium seats and not paying for them.

Still doesn't give anyone the right to be physically aggressive.

ScarlettBlaize · 17/02/2020 15:33

Yeah maybe we shouldn't sit in those seats but the cinema was not full at all. There were loads of other premier seats so we moved into them.

Stop sitting in the premier seats. You are taking the piss. Either spend the extra or just sit in any of the perfectly OK normal seats.

HairyFloppins · 17/02/2020 15:34

You shouldn't sit in the premier seats without paying, this really gets on my nerves. I always pay for premier seats so why should you sit in them for free?

Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:35

I just asked my son how he would describe what the man did to my knees and he said it looked like he was angrily kicking me.

OP posts:
Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:36

Ok I promise not to sit in the premier seats again and apologise fully.

OP posts:
Original poster
earlydoors42 · 17/02/2020 15:37

I don't even see what's better about the premier seats anyway! I let my 13 year old choose. I will tell the kids no next time.

OP posts:
ScarlettBlaize · 17/02/2020 15:38

Ok I promise not to sit in the premier seats again

Yeah right.

VenusTiger · 17/02/2020 15:39

I understand your description OP - but you were wrong to sit in premier seats - not a good lesson for when your kids go to the cinema without you - also, the man was being aggressive as he was stood right in front of you whilst you were getting up - I get that - but, why didn't you just say "excuse me! if you want me to move, can you let me get up!" and again, teach your kids not to give in to this type of behaviour. If you found him intimidating, I understand you not wanting to tell him off, but at least defend yourself in front of your children fgs.