If you can be anything, be kind....

[BeAnythingBeKind]

Its such a simple thing, and can make all the difference.

We are all guilty of it, me included, So instead of making negative comments about the work colleagues, fellow school mum's, stranger on the bus...Say something kind, you never know, it could just make all the difference. No-one really knows what people are going through.

Anyone who wants to vent/talk/cry....Please feel free to let rip here, It's OK not to feel OK

everyone thinks they are being kind though, no one is going to stand up and say "oh yeah, I'm a bully/troll/out and out bitch"

So saying 'be kind' is pointless really.

By all means try not to be unkind. But kindness is not always the most appropriate response. The idea of balancing wisdom and compassion is a better ideal.

Well said Errol.

I've not been on SM for a few years now (liberating, incredibly so) but anyone can post/share/like some "be kind" meme.I will judge you by your actions not some meaningless bolllocks you click on without really thinking about.

I used to be in a business partnership with someone. Her biggest (only) complaint about me was I was too kind.
Hmmmmmm......
No such thing.

I believe strongly in kindness on every level. Sometimes it doesn't work but at least I tried.

Noones saying 'be kind at all costs though.

Its a bit like posting 'share the love' or similar. It doesn't mean love those that are attacking you! There's absolutely nothing wrong with showing kindness and consideration and making that a more widespread thing, make the world a better place an all that, like sharing the love is.

Thats to all, its not sex specific, its everyone, learn to be a bit kinder and not so quick to be nasty and name-call unnecessarily. On sm noone has any idea the impact of some of the awful spiteful shite that some post. It happens all over MN too.

I find it odd that such a well intentioned sentiment can be so berated!

I agree with you, BeAnything. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt though.

It is different on here than real life though because people can say what they feel at the time with little in the way of fall out; the worst is having a post removed by admin. I've seen that happen a lot.

It's best not to become offended by posts of others - we don't each other after all so it can't be personal, we can just ignore. Also if a thread has a lot of posts, it's often sensible not to add anything because it isn't likely to be something that hasn't already been said.

Noones saying 'be kindat all coststhough

But they are.

They are saying be kind...full stop. There are certainly times when it doesnt lay to be kind. It's not saying, be kind.......when its appropriate.

I feel this is just another thing that everyone is spouting and will be forgotten in a couple of weeks like everything else .
A meme being trotted out by hypocrites will not change anything .
Lessons will not be learnt

Its beyond me to understand why be kind means in all eventualities and in every circumstance be kind at all costs.

It just doesn't. That would be silly. Surely it just means be kind to others.

Why is this so difficult? It doesn't say, no matter what. Noone would feel that needs saying.

If someone's being nasty, yes, there are kind ways of deflecting that back without becoming nasty about it, but noones expected to just take abuse without defending themselves and neither ahould they. Just why would they or why assume it means take abuse ..

Who are you calling hypocrites? ...and why?

When even pleasant and well worth intentioned sentiments are berated what the hope is there?

hyprocrites, trotted out, spouting

What would you propose Fizzy

Hypocrites are those posting patronising statements thinking they’re putting the world to rights and look great to their SM audience. Posting meaningless phrases has zilch impact on anybody’s life. Many posting this phrase are anything but kind and to very little to help those that are struggling.

Why does anything need to be suggested?

Do

I “propose” that I will take responsibility for MY actions towards other people .
I do not need to be told by strangers on forums or people on my Facebook feed to “be kind”
I act accordingly to any given situation and no amount of memes or quotes will change that .
Nasty people don’t just change because someone on the internet told them to.
And if I’m thought of as being mean or uncaring or what have you for not lapping this up then so be it .
This will not change anything or anyone .
Social media as a whole needs to change for anything significant to happen

And the hypocrites are the ones I’ve spoken about on thread number 203 about this .. those who are reposting these “be kind” messages and then not 20 minutes later posting another meme about other mums parenting .. that’s just one example of about 6 I’ve seen today alone

Very interesting that you chose to ignore everything else I said, that says more about your judgemental self than it does about me.
I'm loved by my friends, family and many acquaintances. I'm happy with the way I live my life and the way I treat my friends. I don't judge others, unlike you.

@Absolutepowercorrupts I pulled that sentence out because I couldn't believe the sheer nastiness of it. To tell someone who's attempting to put in a good word for kindness to fuck off, and call them names - yes, you're dead right, I absolutely judge that sort of behaviour.

The thing is, no one needs to be told with a patronising meme that they should 'be kind'. Everyone knows they should be kind (or not a dick at least). But people choose not to be, for whatever reason.

And I don't think any amount of memes or social media 'statements' essentially all saying the same thing is going to change that.

I don’t think it’s kindness that’s needed so much as empathy.

Most the people I know posting this quote on social media are the most bitchy, cliquey people I know, who are engaging in the 'mock grief' for someone they didn't even know personally, but they think it makes them look good to post it on Facebook etc. Give it 5 minutes they will be backing laughing at overweight people in Heat magazine and bitching about work colleagues, but hey hum at last they've made themselves look good. The media are just as bad, having hounded the woman for weeks, they now are expressing shock and sadness at her death, as though they had nothing to do with it. Give it a few days they'll just start hounding someone else.

No genuinely nice or kind person needs a meme to be told to be kind to people. Similarly most unpleasant people aren't going to fundamentally change who they are due to a meme doing the rounds on social media.

I honestly don't see an issue with posting it.

There are issues with anyone being disingenuous, but I don't think its cause to stop posting kind things.

Avoid the disingenuous, and support the genuine. SM is a poor platform, it has done great good, but also shows up some of the worst for what they are. It makes it clear who they are! That, to my mind is a good thing.

I like being reminded that there is good and to aim for better, including things that make me monitor my own behaviour.

I am a bit sick of this band wagon every r has jumped on tbh.

Suddenly everyone thinks their opinion matters and they can lecture everyone else about mental health on SM.

The women was not a saint, she allegedly fucked up massively and couldn’t cope with the consequences and sadly killed herself.

I had a thought today that seemed very much in line with your opening post.

I realised (maybe I'm a bit slow, but better late than never) that the hurt in ones life that endures is not the hurt done to you, it's the hurt you inflict
on others that endures..

I can choose to continue to feel the hurt that was inflicted on me, by and large i have worked to not do that.

The hurt i have inflicted on others? I have no more control of that.

And it's the hurt I've inflicted that I regret

Genuinely kind people are just that.. kind. It's the way they are in everyday life with little or no effort.

It is something you could work on (to be more kind,) but much like being a classy or graceful person, you either have it or you don't.

It sounds woke and bullshit but I honestly believe that kindness is always a choice. It doesn't mean I'm a pushover, it doesn't mean I let anyone shit on me. But if there's a chance to be kind that costs me nothing, I'll take it.

What you put out into the world is within your control. I choose to try and put good things into the world because I sleep better that way. I grew up with excessive neglect, unkindness and abuse and have spent the better part of my adult life deliberately avoiding repeating that cycle and avoiding treating others that way.

In a world where you can read proper newspapers, don’t buy tabloid crap like the Daily Mail.