To ask for the question you always get asked, when the person saying it thinks they're the first person to say it.

[GetMeOffThisCycleOfMisery]

Light-hearted.

Examples. As a teen I worked in a shop, sometimes something doesn't scan and the customer (if paying attention) without fail would say, "Oh, that's free then?" Followed by a chuckle.

I wear very high heels a lot, I get told all the time, "How you don't break your neck in those, I'll never know!"

The latest one, my DP is a head chef, people always say, "Oooh, I bet you get loads of lovely meals cooked for you!" I bloody wish, it's a Busman's Holiday for him, he doesn't want to cook after a day in the kitchen. 😆

My first name is Kay.

"OK, Kay... hahahaha d'you get it? ... OK KAY!"

I am almost 52. It's not new to me.

But Buzz why would anyone think that a person with a penis and a person with a vagina could possibly be identical?

Electric Wheelchair User

"Have you got a licence/passed your test?"

"You can see you've got a licence/passed your test"

Wasn't that funny the first time. Genuinely unfunny/aggravating now. Everyone thinks they are original.

THERE IS NEITHER A LICENCE OR A TEST, FUCK OFF

"You could put a saddle on that / who's walking who?". I have a big dog.

If you've never had children or been around twins, it's not as "idiotic" hmm as you think to ask a perfectly reasonable-sounding question.

I've never met a man with a penis that looks like a vagina so I'd say it was obvious that they are not identical.

My name has a nursery rhyme connected to it.

The amount of FUCKING TIMES I HAVE HAD IT SUNG TO ME 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️😂😂😂😂

Boys and girls have different genitals and different chromosomes. So not identical.

'Have you tried drinking vinegar/going vegan/cutting out bread, rice pasta, potatoes, tomatoes, citrus. aubergines, peppers, fruit/vegetables, pulses, meat, fish, grains, nuts, seeds breathing /exercising/praying/meditating/yoga/running/psychiatry/thinking happy thoughts/getting some sunshine/buying a half million pound house at the seaside/emigrating/getting my arse flushed out with a hosepipe full of coffee/not having coffee in the conventional method?'

Short of finding half a million quid down the back of the sofa or shoving a hosepipe of Kenco up my 'Arris, yes, I've tried all of them. And they don't fucking work.

Everybody's an expert on fucking Autoimmune Diseases. Especially when they don't have the slightest fucking clue about them existing or what they mean.

Not quite the same, but people hear about my disabilities and instantly try and come up with suggestions to work around issues I have.

Like, come on. If you thought of it in under 60 seconds I've already thought of it myself. Either I already do it or it doesn't work.

This is a fantastic thread by the way and I am
Cringing at all the times I have made some
Of
These very unoriginal
And lame comments

‘This is how much I drink [lists the week’s alcohol intake]. Do you think I’ve got a problem?^

I don’t give a shit. Just because my husband died of alcoholism doesn’t mean I want to reassure you that you haven’t got a problem.

@BuzzShitbagBobbly
It’s just general knowledge isn’t it to know that mixed gender twins aren’t identical?

When I was in a shop buying a new phone, they asked for my date of birth. I gave it and as he scrolled back and back and back on the computer I said "not sure it goes back that far ha ha ha," and the guy said "Ha ha that one never gets old" which to my distress was clearly a big fat LIE

I have a boy and a girl. My daughter has got a trendy name sort of like aria or myla. My son's got a traditional name like Arthur or Alfie. I have been asked so many times by so many people why I picked a traditional name after picking a modern name.

my partner was asked by a doctor in hospital when my son was tiny and we said his name and then said his sister's name. the ASDA delivery man also asked me what made me go for two completely different types of name. two or three elderly people in the street of asked me what my kids are called and they also asked me the like why did you pick Arthur after having a Mila. I literally never thought about it I just chose names that I liked. Now I think I've had done something really bizarre that nobody else would do. I suppose they don't massively compliment each other but their names are for them as individuals and they're not going to go through life as a pair.

I literally just say to people i just liked it. then they say oh did you name your son after a grandparent and I say no I just like his name.

I also used to work in retail and I know exactly what you mean about things not scanning becoming freebie jokes and if you're not smiling people like smile it might never happen. or if it's really rainy or really hot outside people say oh you're so lucky you're in here with the heating or air-con. also when people ask you if you're eating for two when you're enjoying your food. lots of things that we heard a million times before and people just say them like theye hilarious. Suppose it's a Very British things to do haha.

I used to work in a bank-

'Do you have any free samples?'

I think the boy/girl twins question thing is a bit weird to ask, unless you don't realise it's one of each.

I spend considerable time in a wheelchair with my leg stuck out in front of me, occasionally in plaster.

"ooh you won't be playing for (insert name of any football team) this Saturday" many, many times.. One old bloke once even thwacked extended, be-plastered leg with his walking stick whilst guffawing at his hilarious originality.

I have a deaf dog (born deaf ) and almost every person I tell says "Are you sure?"
A good number will then click their fingers behind her head just to check.

Oh MitziK I sympathise with that! And the amount of people that suggest I take a supplement that would make it worse.

“What you need is some grape seed extract and extra high doses of Vitamin D and B! You’ll be right as rain in no time!”

No, Mavis, what I needed was to be born with a different fucking body.

Retail worker here. Definitely familiar with the "oh, it must be free then" when something doesn't scan first time.

Used to own a café. Got asked all the time by people who came in once a month or so "Latte on the house as I'm a regular?"
Err. No. fuck off. I'm a business, not a charity. One bloke in particular used to really rile me with this. His mate used to roll his eyes. Said bloke was always whining that he couldn't keep a woman!
Funnily enough, the people who came in every day for lunch never expected freebies!

sorry about the it must be free then ive done that- only a joke i dont intend on stealing it

@aLilNonnyMouse omg I know. That's another thing. I've struggled with my iron levels massively for ages. My sister asked told me to have more vitamin c. I literally have plenty and that's not a cure lol

Oh, are you left handed?

They think they're so original don't they?

@Greenandcabbagelooking I think I know you, there a mum at school called Mrs Westbromwichalbion

I've struggled with my iron levels massively for ages. My sister asked told me to have more vitamin c. I literally have plenty and that's not a cure lol

Isn't it vitamin C in fruit juice that helps you absorb iron if you drink it at the same time as eating your meal? I thought milk inhibited absorbing iron and vitamin c helped it?

"Bet you wouldn't be without him ?" said to me as an unmarried mother - single parents hadn't been invented then.
Never said to married mums who had multiple children