To ask why people announce baby names before it’s born?

[LLBandTTC]

I don’t remember the last person that I know who had a baby and didn’t announce the name before it was even born, I don’t understand why you would? What if baby is born and they don’t suit it, etc? Just interested to know if anyone here has announced their babies name before birth and if so, why? (Not a dig, just curious)

Each to their own. It's odd that you're so affected by this - unless it's your baby people are insisting on naming, why should they not tell people if they want? It's their baby, not yours, and tbh your excitement or lack thereof is probably fairly low down their list of post-birth worries!

I'm in the camp of not finding out what sex it is and not telling anyone the name you've chosen. A few people had babies at work over the years. I knew the sex and name beforehand and the only thing left to find out was the least interesting part - the weight. No skin off my nose but no real excitement or interest to the announcement at all. Just 'Gabriella's' here or whatever. Each to their own though.

@annielouise

I would have thought that the excitement wold be the arrival of a healthy baby.

I will never understand why keeping everything pregnancy and birth-related a secret or surprise is seen as a virtue. If that's what you want to do, then great. If you want to find out the sex early, announce the baby's name early, then that's also great for you.

I care very little about how other people handle their pregnancies unless it is a close friend or relative, so I'm amazing people have opinions on it at all.

We didnt but found people put so much pressure on you to say what the name is, some people really wont leave it alone

This thread is making me a bit 😖 like if you don’t have a name picked, fair. But here it seems like people have a name and are actively using their unborn child as some sort of excitement/attention seeker. It makes 0 sense. And who the fuck cares when a baby is born about their name as if that’s more important than hearing the news of a healthy arrival? Sometimes I feel like I live in another universe to people on MN.

We never announced ours but had chosen well in advance and told people when they asked. A large part of the reason for that is that we were both completely bemused by the concept of a new baby not suiting a name.

Also I hadn't even thought of keeping it quiet to be a surprise, your post OP is the first time I've ever encountered the idea, and it's equally bemusing. Most people don't give as much of a shit a you think and for those who for some reason have decided you should provide them with a surprise, why would you make decisions based on that?

I would have thought that the excitement wold be the arrival of a healthy baby.

As would I.

Because we'd already decided. I was glad with our second that we had decided because then we had to have a TFMR and it meant he already had a name for his funeral and everything.
I'll do the same again this pregnancy.

I think people who want to surprise others with sex or name are just sad. It's not that interesting unless it's your baby.

And no we didn't announce their names, just told people if they asked.

those who for some reason have decided you should provide them with a surprise, why would you make decisions based on that?

I genuinely don’t know what is more bizarre - people expecting some sort of “surprise” re someone else’s birth, or people holding back on information to surprise others.

I genuinely don’t know what is more bizarre - people expecting some sort of “surprise” re someone else’s birth, or people holding back on information to surprise others.

I'm similarly torn. This thread has been a revelation.

I have also noticed this too. It doesn't really affect me because it's often just people on Facebook I know but not close with. I think it's nice when people say the sex but I do feel disappointed when they announce at 24 weeks they can't wait to meet Ella Grace or Arthur Thomas. But I guess it's that they are bursting and want to share those details because that's how they do things. I also personally don't tell Facebook and extended family before 12 weeks. I always cringe a little at those posts. I remember when I was having my second a lass posted a pregnancy test and said they were excited to announce Lucas was going to be a big brother. Then she had her first scan and was due the same date as me. I didn't even know I was pregnant when she announced that. I was coming up to 4 weeks. So she announced at 4 weeks. That's abit early in my view but people do seem to also do that now!

I've told a few people because they asked didn't announce it thought I know a few people who have announced it on Facebook months before the birth

We were due our baby in 1 week and haven't found out the sex. We do have 2 of each names but decided to keep it to ourself. Purely because people these days have far too much to say and I'd be gutted if they turned their noses up at our choices. I had a name I loved as a child right up until just before I fell pregnant and when I mentioned it a few people laughed. I was gutted and everytime I thought about the name I could picture their laughing faces. I think you can find out too much before the baby is here. Gender, 4D scans etc. Where is the surprise. I cannot wait for my husband to tell me what we have.

ARE due our baby in 1 week. Felt sick when I read that back 😓😓

Never announced it but knew ds1’s name the minute we left the scan room. Had always had a boy or girl name.. so he was getting one or the other. And dc2 we sat with lists over a few weeks throwing names back n forward until we liked one.

They all need a name, can’t really say I’ve ever been surprised by someone naming their child. And I’ve never seen someone’s baby n declared he must be a Henry! They all look like crinkly old men for a bit.

I think people might be misunderstanding the OP's point.

It's not the naming your child or telling people if they ask that we are talking about, it's the big pregnancy announcement and endless scan pictures online with a full on name and sex announcement before the baby is born that I personally find odd.

Totally selfish reasons because babies aren't really my thing but atleast if someone sends out an actual birth announcement with healthy baby, named x and weight I can atleast act excited for them as it's new information. Otherwise it's old news and I'm thinking - oh right I'm sure I congratulated you ages ago!

It has no impact on me or the new parents long term but since we're discussing opinions on the matter I will express them but wouldn't be so miserable in real life.

I dont think its about then suiting it but more of a feeling you get when they're born. We picked put are names but had no idea which one we would go with before the bay was born. Then the name just came so easily. I would not have announced the names in advance because it would have encouraged unwelcome criticism. Once baby is here and you say this is the name people tend to keep their opinions or themselves of negative as too late to ask you to reconsider.

We picked out our^

to themselves if^ sorry toddler jumping on me

She's said a bit more than that though floozy. Like the stuff about wanting to keep it a surprise for people, which for at least two of us on this thread is the first time we'd ever encountered the idea. And the claim that certain babies won't suit certain names. That one is a reasonably well known view I think, but controversial.

Fundamentally, the OP seems to be coming from the perspective that people will be excited to hear the name when the baby is born and their excitement will be diminished if they already know it. This is a curious concept to a lot of us, evidently.

I think they all look like wrinkly aliens so there could easily be a generic one suits all name 🤣

We didn’t find out the sex, and if we had wouldn’t have told anyone: I couldn’t bear the whole nonsense of stereotyping being projected on a child even before they were born.

And we didn’t tell anyone the name, either. Too many people start in with the comments and criticisms, but once the baby is born, and introduced by name, that’s that.

Not really, crispysausagerolls. I'm talking about people at work that I knew but weren't particularly close friends with. Yes, pleased the baby was healthy, of course, that's standard, but finding that out gave no real 'excitement'.

Not a big deal but it was just a passing thought I had when a few people at work would say the baby was here now. Rather than have people saying after the birth so what did you have, and what you going to call it and finding out the details and making them the centre of attention for a bit there wasn't really anything to ask. All the goodwill stuff had already really been said. They'd say when pregnant "We had the scan and we're expecting a boy" - everyone would say ah, lovely, boys are great etc (same if they said a girl). Then a bit later they'd say we've chosen this name, ah lovely we'd say, that's nice. Then you'd hear things like we painting Ella's room or whatever and you'd say ah lovely, so when the baby was here there wasn't much left to discuss or talk about - it already felt the baby had been here a while.

It's not about offering others a surprise. No one really cares that much about someone else's baby. It was just what I noticed when others have had babies - you know all the details, you've cooed and shared in their joy already a few times over the details, you've shown an interest in various things. Doesn't matter. Each to their own I say. People should do whatever they want to do. In the work situation I describe above it's just want I, and a few others, noticed and felt.