To ask why people announce baby names before it’s born?

[LLBandTTC]

I don’t remember the last person that I know who had a baby and didn’t announce the name before it was even born, I don’t understand why you would? What if baby is born and they don’t suit it, etc? Just interested to know if anyone here has announced their babies name before birth and if so, why? (Not a dig, just curious)

Another here agreeing with CommunistLegoBloc

Aside from the fact that it isn't unknown on occasion for parents to be told the baby is definitely one sex and then it turns out to be the other or for the parents to have a last-minute change of heart, I think it takes some of the enjoyment of actually meeting the baby away.

A newborn baby doesn't have an occupation, hobbies, known characteristics or likes and dislikes and doesn't yet have any anecdotes to tell about their life.

This is going to sound bonkers, but the only new information about themselves that they have to offer at that stage is their sex, weight and name and it's nice to have something to find out about them at the same time you first meet them. Knowing all of that (well, probably not the weight) beforehand is almost like stealing their thunder. Yes, I realise that the baby will neither know nor care, but I'm thinking from the pov of adults who are welcoming the new person into their family/social circle. I just think it's nicer to do all of the bonding/getting used to at the same time.

It might be a strange analogy, but it's a little bit like a wedding dress. The guests will have a very good idea of what kind of outfit the bride will be wearing, but most brides like the day of the wedding to be the first time people see the actual dress that they've chosen - being worn in the proper context on the significant day.

If you wouldn't go around showing everybody photos of you wearing your wedding dress in the shop in advance of the day (and if you would, fair enough), why ever would you introduce the name of your baby to them before you have the actual baby to introduce along with his or her name?

I never thought I had an issue with this until recently, my niece has been talking non-stoo about "Baby X" and posted full name on her Social media tagline about 4 months ago. We don't live nearby or talk that much so when I saw newborn photos accompanied by an announcement a few weeks ago my first thought was that I had kind of forgot the baby hadn't been born months ago so it felt like old news which is a bit of a sad thought really.

With that said we werent exactly in the MI5 camp either, we didn't find out the sex in either pregnancy but had chosen boy/girl names early on and if people asked we told them the possible names.

I’d picked my name and wanted to tell people

when I saw newborn photos accompanied by an announcement a few weeks ago my first thought was that I had kind of forgot the baby hadn't been born months ago so it felt like old news which is a bit of a sad thought really.

Yes, that's exactly it. You've had all the excitement/interest of the new baby in advance and then, when it's actually born, instead of a joyous new event, it can just seem like it's somebody dotting the Is and crossing the Ts on something you've already been long used to.

These days parents have more access to information regarding their babies via scans. So I think the prior not choosing the name reverts back to when people didn’t even know the babies gender. Some want to share some don’t it’s no baggy.

We had a favourite name with both my babies but didn't announce before as wanted to see if it suited both times it did. I find it strange too. I did announce the gender and had family together to do so which was lovely

I agree OP, I didn't announce DS's name until I held him in my arms because TBH I just didn't know if it would suit him.

Really not sure. Not something l would ever do

@Snowflake9 l would have to agree with him

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll yes that’s exactly it! It just takes away from the baby being born I think. I just don’t understand the rush. I’m not saying it has to be totally hush hush and pretentious but it just seems a shame to tell everyone on your friend list!

@BlueEyedFloozy yes that’s a good point! You kind of feel like the baby’s already born when it has a name so soon!

I told two of my best friends but noone else before my daughter was born. In the hospital I told the nurse I wasn't sure if I was keeping her name but she told me to and said it suited her. Kinda got what she meant but not really. But she kept the name.

We kept ours a secret.

My parents made this mistake many, many years ago. They told everyone my sister’s planned name. Baby born. Within 24 hours my parents realize they planned the wrong name and choose something else when it comes time to do the birth certificate. She was a December baby and the instant she was born several relatives ordered engraved Christmas ornaments. So to this day, she has all these baby gifts with the wrong name on them.

Before I knew what I was having I had my heart set on a specific "girl" name and a specific "boy" name, my cousin had a baby while I was pregnant and used the boys name even though she had only thought of it because of me, so as soon as i found out i was having a boy i was thinking of names and my nanny picked son's name, at about 6/7 months pregnant I announced what his name was because I had already told a few people and heard that somebody who was due after me decided they liked the name too after I had said it, I posted a scan picture with the name attached that night because i wasn't losing another name😂 long story short her child is about 2 months younger with the same name

Oh and DH and I had our top name all picked out. The instant I saw her, I knew it was wrong. It wasn’t until a couple of hours later when we actual got to talk. Turns out, he had the same exact reaction. We both recognized her as another name on our short-list the second we saw her.

Each to their own, but IMHO, we've swung way over to the other direction. Some parents make such a huge thing about gender-reveal parties and baby showers during the pregnancy. OTOH, some refuse to give people any details at all, whether it be caginess about the name (as if it's an esoteric, enigmatic mystery rather than just what a new person is to be known as) or even these strange people who refuse ever to reveal the baby's sex, long after birth, as "We're bringing Moon Carpet up to be a person, not a gender, and we want them to decide their own identity when they're older".

I'm probably old fashioned, but what was wrong with showing people your new baby (or calling them shortly after the birth, before they meet the baby soon after that) and saying "This is Phoebe, she weighed 7lbs 3oz, she and Mum are doing well and we're over the moon with her!" ?

Why does everyone care so much about what other people choose to do? It doesn’t affect you. Live and let live.

Well I didn't put it on social media but I did tell people, like others have said only because we kept getting asked constantly!

We did because the moment we knew I was pregnant, we could only decide on one boys name and couldn't think of a girls name at all. Then, when we found out we were having a boy, it seemed like fate. The name suits him perfectly.

But kids change so much as they grow up, I dont know if you can decide a name suits them when they're born. They all have squishy faces lol.

Who are parents meant to be surprising with keeping the name secret until the baby is born? You? You are not that important! People just get excited and want to share their happiness. People are just so critical of other people these days. Who really cares when people announce their baby name?

My daughter was very secretive about her babies name .i was her birth partner and I did not know babies name until after her birth ...lovely surprise !

Totally agree. It would also stop all the angst on the baby names boards from people posting things like "We told everyone that our baby will be called Sarah (or any other bog standard name) and nobody likes it!" Once the baby is born, people feel less free to express mean opinions.

Because people ask constantly ime so it's easier to just tell them. Also all newborns look like slightly over-boiled potatoes- of course they can't suit names!

Does it really matter? I've decided on my DCs name and if people ask, I tell them because it's not really a big deal. This is my third and I don't think babies 'look' like any name, personally. But if I did decide to change my mind, so what? No one can stop me just because I've already told people I was going to name the baby soemthing else.

Because that’s my baby’s name. He’s a person to me although he’s not yet here, he’s not just “baby”, he’s “XYZ” and I like to refer to him as such. Same reason I like to know the gender - it’s a bonding thing for me.

I’m certainly not keeping it secret so someone else can feel some bizarre sense of surprise....

@namechanger2019

Yes! Well said!

@KatnissK

Agree, never understand how a newborn suits anything!

We're 23 weeks with a suprise, we have both names with middle names picked out and will only be telling people when the baby is born, otherwise it's boring!