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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you should carry your child?

299 replies

ClaudiaWankleman · 11/02/2020 08:19

Parents with small children who insist on letting them try to walk up the stairs on the tube/ train/ other busy public areas.

It inevitably creates a tight bottleneck at an area a bottleneck is already going to form. We all have to squeeze into 2/3 of the space while you lead a wobbling toddler up some stairs that are way too advanced for them.

Not only is it horrendously dirty when they sit down on the third step before you heave them back up (always happens) it seems quite dangerous. There is always the chance that someone will accidentally trample them as it’s quite difficult to see in the restricted spaces.

Not least that if I had been able to get up the stairs 15 seconds quicker I would’ve been on my train instead of having to wait for the next one.

AIBU to think that you should carry your child?

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 11/02/2020 18:18

And I'd like to see you explain your reasoning to a screaming 2 yr old who wants to walk and won't be carried.

This ^^ actually made me snigger out loud Grin

They're 2 years old.

You don't 'explain or reason' with them.

You pick them up and carry them Confused

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 18:20

You do have a very strong opinion of yourself clearly, is that why you think others should just wait behind you? You are too grand to get out of the way without needed to be told to do so?

I am guessing the rules about standing in escalators don't apply to you either?

mantarays · 11/02/2020 18:21

is that why you think others should just wait behind you?

Is that why you think you should be able to barge past others who don’t happen to walk as quickly as you, but who were there before you? And you’re too special to just say “Excuse me”?

Obviouspretzel · 11/02/2020 18:31

This reminds me of the thread where someone asked if this country is hostile to children.

You honestly sound pathetic. I get so impatient when people are slow but children are people. They have the same right to the space as you do. I know you're really mega busy but you should get over yourself.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 18:31

Is that why you think you should be able to barge past others who don’t happen to walk as quickly as you, but who were there before you?

I shouldn't have to barge past others, they should do like everyone else and leave enough space for others to rush if they want to. It's not hard, sorry if it hurts your sensibility somehow.

but who were there before you? Grin are you 6 years old? The last person on the platform might be catching the 1st train, which you don't need. Who cares about that.

Again, a very simple rule, even for people like you. Just get out of the fucking way.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 18:35

Just get out of the fucking way.

You’re a little tin-pot bully, aren’t you? Raging at 3 year olds for not leaving you space in the busiest train stations in the world. Get a blood pressure check. And no, if it comes to it, I won’t “get out of the fucking way”. You’ll have to put your big girl pants on and wait.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 19:09

mantarays
I am not raging, I am trying to make the message clear. Even for people like you , who believe basic courtesy and common sense don't apply to them. You are not that important, sorry my dear.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 19:10

JosefKeller

I am. I and what I am doing am every bit as important as you and what you are doing. If my daughter and I are in front of you and you are too rude to behave as any ordinary person would and ask, I’m not moving for you. There we are.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 19:13

mantarays
don't be so childish, just stick to the side, and don't block people's way.

There's no need for you to be in front of everyone rushing, there really isn't. You know that. You are not that important that others should ask you to behave like a reasonable adult. You are neither cute nor important. Honest.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 19:15

JosefKeller

Obviously if there is space to walk at the side, I will, given that my child is three, very small and vulnerable, and there are so many impatient, aggressive and entitled people about.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 19:34

obviously...

BigChocFrenzy · 11/02/2020 19:58

Small DC have just as much right as anyone else to move at their best speed in railway stations etc,
so long as they aren't mucking about

Some elderly or disabled people would be just as likely to hold up those Very Important People late for their train.

What does annoy and should be stopped:
Small DC in coffee shops & restaurants getting in the way of people carrying hot drinks & food,
or making too much noise / mess and spoiling the meal out for others, of making extra work for staff

CrohnicallyEarly · 11/02/2020 20:15

@JosefKeller I asked this in a general sense earlier, but nobody has answered. Maybe you could enlighten me?

In the scenario OP posted, room for three abreast, one ‘lane’ with a child going up but two ‘lanes’ coming down, why is it the parent and child who is in the wrong? If the people coming down were single file there would be room for overtakers.

Purpleartichoke · 11/02/2020 20:22

Not a chance I am carrying my toddler on a busy staircase. It’s too easy to trip and fall, especially if you have a bad back. Much safer to walk carefully behind, each holding the rail and using my other hand to guide them.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 20:32

Obviously our children are far less important than @JosefKeller.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 20:38

mantarays
not sure why you feel the need to be so goady?

You are not as clever or important as you seem to think my poor dear Smile

mantarays · 11/02/2020 20:41

JosefKeller

Oh, I am. I have an ordinary sense of my own importance. And I feel the need to be “goady”, presumably, for reasons similar to those you have for feeling the need to be so unbearably rude: compulsive, inexplicable, probably stemming from something in my childhood.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 20:44

clearly...

JustSayYo · 11/02/2020 20:49

*And I'd like to see you explain your reasoning to a screaming 2 yr old who wants to walk and won't be carried.

This ^^ actually made me snigger out loud

They're 2 years old.

You don't 'explain or reason' with them.

You pick them up and carry them*

I don't have a sarcasm font but I was being flippant. Out of everything I said though it's a weird thing to focus on!

*not sure why you feel the need to be so goady?

You are not as clever or important as you seem to think my poor dear*

Oh, the irony.

Barbie222 · 11/02/2020 20:53

This is just life. That's why you should always plan to be 15 minutes early. One day a staggering toddler, tomorrow it will be a pensioner, or someone else who would love to be as quick as an able bodied adult, but can't. Or should they all avoid the Very Important People doing their Proper Jobs too?

Get over yourself a bit and enjoy the chance to see sides of life that's a bit out of your bubble.

Barbie222 · 11/02/2020 20:54

Love that that nearly autocorrected to Very Impotent People, too!!

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 20:57

That's why you should always plan to be 15 minutes early.

So very helpful when nurseries don't open until a certain time and trains are delayed, really amazing advice, thank you, I am sure people who are rushing to catch trains never even thought about that groundbreaking piece of advice.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 21:08

To be fair, as a SAHM I am rarely in a hurry. I can easily afford to give way to (polite) people in a hurry. But I’ve been a commuter as well, and never behaved with rudeness to people trying to navigate public transport with small children.

Forcryingoutloudwtf · 11/02/2020 22:00

I have a really bad back. I can't carry my child. It's quite common.

Lweji · 11/02/2020 22:00

Just get out of the fucking way.

I'm a fast walker, occasionally running to catch some form of transport in a busy station. I haven't had a 2 year old for 13 years. Even then, I might have taken him to a busy city centre during the week maybe a couple of times at the most.

You are being fucking unreasonable. And you're not not that important.