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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you should carry your child?

299 replies

ClaudiaWankleman · 11/02/2020 08:19

Parents with small children who insist on letting them try to walk up the stairs on the tube/ train/ other busy public areas.

It inevitably creates a tight bottleneck at an area a bottleneck is already going to form. We all have to squeeze into 2/3 of the space while you lead a wobbling toddler up some stairs that are way too advanced for them.

Not only is it horrendously dirty when they sit down on the third step before you heave them back up (always happens) it seems quite dangerous. There is always the chance that someone will accidentally trample them as it’s quite difficult to see in the restricted spaces.

Not least that if I had been able to get up the stairs 15 seconds quicker I would’ve been on my train instead of having to wait for the next one.

AIBU to think that you should carry your child?

OP posts:
JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 17:43

They really don’t.

they really do, why do you think people go to stations for? Confused

SarahTancredi · 11/02/2020 17:43

Who says the mums of toddlers arent on their way to work anyway. Assumed they must out fir a stroll cos they leave with plenty of time and dont have to run and knock everyone flying on the way like proper commuters

mantarays · 11/02/2020 17:44

JosefKeller

I think people go to stations to travel. You?

mantarays · 11/02/2020 17:45

HOW do you get yourself 3-4 minutes when your 1st train is LATE and missing the connecting one means waiting 1 hour for the next one?

Well, sure, in that case you’re going to miss your train. But it’s nothing to do with someone walking in front of you more slowly than you prefer. That’s life.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 17:46

mantarays
according to you, there seem to be there to stroll around and get in other people's way...

I am a bit confused by your reasoning I have to say.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 17:47

according to you, there seem to be there to stroll around and get in other people's way...

You probably don’t get it because I didn’t say it. Confused

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 17:48

Well, sure, in that case you’re going to miss your train. But it’s nothing to do with someone walking in front of you more slowly than you prefer. That’s life.

it's not life, it's pure selfishness from some idiot, and you wouldn't miss your train if the fucker was getting out of the way as they should. As normal people do, thankfully, most people seem to be able to use their brain!

For people who commute or travel daily, it's a daily race.. but hey, you might have 1 hour or 2 to lose every day, some of us don't.

JustSayYo · 11/02/2020 17:49

@JosefKeller It's pretty clear - they may not be commuting, but if they are intending to travel on a train, use the ticket office or shop, or speak to staff at the station then they have exactly the same right to be there as commuters.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 17:51

JosefKeller

Tough. You’re in a hurry. That doesn’t mean everyone else is a “fucker” if they don’t move aside for you. You’re not the Queen.

JustSayYo · 11/02/2020 17:52

it's not life, it's pure selfishness from some idiot, and you wouldn't miss your train if the fucker was getting out of the way as they should

How should they know to get out of the way if nobody says excuse me? Your logic is so egocentric it's laughable.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 17:54

How should they know to get out of the way if nobody says excuse me? Your logic is so egocentric it's laughable.

do you really need to be told "excuse me" not to block the way? Confused
My apologies, I was naively assuming that people have a basic level of intelligence, I clearly shouldn't Grin

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 17:56

mantarays
You are the one making it about "me". Normal people with basic manners and intelligence don't get in the way of travellers/ commuters in general... unless they are either idiots or selfish morons. No excuse really.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 17:57

do you really need to be told "excuse me" not to block the way?

In the train stations I’ve been in, it’s not blocking the way, it’s just being before you in a line. If not, you can go round. 🤷🏻‍♀️

JustSayYo · 11/02/2020 17:58

Dear lord Grin there's nothing wrong with my intelligence. The thread is about a parent walking with their toddler. They're well within their rights to go at their own pace. If you are going to be late because you're stuck behind them, and you can't go around, you're well within your rights to say "excuse me, please". At that point it's reasonable to expect them to let you past before they carry on. It's not reasonable to expect them to magically just know that you're behind them and late for your train and you can't get past.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 17:58

JosefKeller

Normal people with manners do exactly that. They walk at their own pace to their own train, and if someone with manners wants to get by, they ask. Confused

QuestionableMouse · 11/02/2020 18:01

I couldn't carry my 18mo nephew because he's too heavy and fights you. He goes out in his buggy if it's a busy place or walks if it's quiet. If I had to carry him up or down stairs I'd be worried about falling, especially if it's super busy.

AnnaMariaDreams · 11/02/2020 18:04

Depends on the age of the child.
Under 2 YANBU
Over that they get heavy!
DS is 7 and quite speedy but I still make him hold my hand on steep stairs, escalators and in busy areas. No carrying though and he does go on the stair behind while travelling on the escalator.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 18:10

DD is 3. No, she doesn’t move as fast as a wired commuter, but she moves as fast as she can. And no, I can’t carry her the length of say, St Paul’s or Waterloo stations. If we have to go to those hellholes it’s for a good reason and she has as much right to walk as anyone else.

Therarestone · 11/02/2020 18:11

Get a grip

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 18:11

Normal people with manners do exactly that. They walk at their own pace to their own train, and if someone with manners wants to get by, they ask.

no, normal people with manners leave enough space for others, they are not so important that others have to "ask" to go through, you don't block the entire platform by strolling in the middle Confused

Why, just why would anyone do that?

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 18:13

I can’t carry her the length of say, St Paul’s or Waterloo stations. If we have to go to those hellholes it’s for a good reason and she has as much right to walk as anyone else.

they are only hellholes because of people like you.... Some of us manage with more than 1 child too.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 18:13

JosefKeller

If we’re talking about a station where it’s busy and tight enough for us to block your progress along the platform, it’s too busy and tight for us to leave you space. Obviously. Or we would.

The entitlement here! Shock

mantarays · 11/02/2020 18:14

they are only hellholes because of people like you....

Ha ha ha ha ha! No, dear. No.

JosefKeller · 11/02/2020 18:16

Ha ha ha ha ha! No, dear. No

well, I was lucky enough not to face anyone like you tonight, so I got my train perfectly on time, so really, only hellholes when rude and entitled people mess things up. Otherwise, it is fine.

mantarays · 11/02/2020 18:18

only hellholes when rude and entitled people mess things up

Yup. People who think they have a divine right to push past others without using their manners. Very common in those places I mentioned, and no less common for being common, if you see what I mean.