To think you should carry your child?

[ClaudiaWankleman]

Parents with small children who insist on letting them try to walk up the stairs on the tube/ train/ other busy public areas.

It inevitably creates a tight bottleneck at an area a bottleneck is already going to form. We all have to squeeze into 2/3 of the space while you lead a wobbling toddler up some stairs that are way too advanced for them.

Not only is it horrendously dirty when they sit down on the third step before you heave them back up (always happens) it seems quite dangerous. There is always the chance that someone will accidentally trample them as it’s quite difficult to see in the restricted spaces.

Not least that if I had been able to get up the stairs 15 seconds quicker I would’ve been on my train instead of having to wait for the next one.

AIBU to think that you should carry your child?

Or maybe commuters could take more care and look where they're going, and realise they aren't more important than everyone else!

it's not that, slow people stick to the side and leave the ones in a rush go through.

So it's not specific to toddlers, it applies to tourists who haven't got a clue where they are going, idiots stopping at the top of escalators, the ones who decide that the best place to faff finding a ticket is right in front of a gate, or people just musing on the platform when others are running for a train.

It's a very simple rule, which makes like easier for everyone: Get out of the fucking way. Thank you.

Get out of the fucking way. Thank you. This disgusting attitude is the actual reason why people assume others are as inconsiderate as themselves.

Yes highly annoying especially when coming off escalators its bloody dangerous

my2bundles - quite honestly, I get more people stopping to say hello than I do impatient responses. People generally show the softer side of their natures, not the leaner, meaner side. Little people bring out the best in others, not the worst. Oh......and..…..I also let them toddle around in the SUPERMARKET!!!!! Aaargh!!!!

Can I just point out that not one of the people saying they let their toddler walk has said that they let their toddler run riot wherever they want with no rules. A walking toddler doesn't automatically equal a misbehaving toddler!

Also what's wrong with saying "excuse me, please"??

Well you cant play the victim if you say excuse me and someone moves everyone is meant to know how important you are and part like the red sea.

Yes autuMN in an appropriate setting I also stop and say hello to toddlers and delight in what might be a first experience with their parents . But a train station is a dangerous place with people rushing everywhere and allowing a toddler to do this us that environment concerns me for the toddlers safety. Allow your toddler to toddle around the supermarket but keep in mind others are there to shop not coo over your child and like me will be more engaged with my own kids than looking out for a tiny child.

@SarahTancredi Nailed it 😂

Seriously! Maybe you could have consideration for the mum and child.

I couldn’t physically carry a child. Plus there’s a pushchair to negotiate as well.

So basically we should ban everyone who interferes with your journey.

JustSayYo
Can I just point out that not one of the people saying they let their toddler walk has said that they let their toddler run riot wherever they want with no rules.

How likely is it that they would? I mean, seriously, "Why shouldn't I let my toddler do whatever it wants and to hell with how awful that is for everyone else anywhere near it" really wouldn't be likely to get much approval.

ConstanceSalinger
Genuinely how often do you get tripped up by a child or see a child getting kicked in your daily commute?

To be fair to the OP, I don't live in the UK, but had the misfortune a couple of weeks ago to be on the tube in London at rush hour. There was a mother with a child of no more than 2 years old, she wasn't holding it's hand, wasn't actually within grabbing reach and I watched with my heart in my mouth as the little thing nearly ended up head first down one of those really long escalators as it dashed across the top as a man was rushing through the crowds. My heart was pounding, I have no idea how the man actually missed him. The mother had the audacity to yell at him to watch where he was going...

On a side note, I don't think anyone has a problem with under-control small people walking up the stairs in front of their parent, just like an old or disabled person taking their time. As long as you can get round them it's not a bother, but a toddler who is allowed to dash around or walk up the middle of the stairs is a hazard. And parents do need to be more aware of what a hazard they may be, if only for the safety of their child. As in my experience above, if the man HAD knocked the child down the escalator, would it have been much comfort to the mother that the man should have been watching where he was going? It's alright in theory having the moral high ground, but in reality?

Just curious OP, what makes you think you have more of a right to walk where you want to, when you want to, than a child of any age? Or in fact anyone with limited mobility or unpredictability (elderly, SN, physical disabilities whether permanent or temporary). My 2 year old walks, admittedly he's ahead of the curve with his body control so he walks with the ability of a three year old. He enjoys it, he asks to do it, he gets distressed if he 'isn't allowed. I see no reason to take away his right to choice because you (or anyone els) believe you are the big important adult and so can do what you like and all others should accommodate you.
I bet you are also the type of person to barge past when people get in your way, or scream in kids faces at coffee shops when they get out of their seat to put things in the bin! Because children shouldn't be seen or heard in public places don't you know!

Yanbu.

There are places where it is acceptable for a parent to walk a small tot around and there are places that are not acceptable. A busy public place like a station is not one of them. There are people with luggage, hot beverages, people running for buses and trains, etc. It is not a safe place to be walking about with a small child. If it is during off-peak fair enough, but rush hour, no. The risk isn’t worth it.

I’m heavily pregnant so I struggle to carry my massive 2 year old for more than a short distance. Where there are a lot of people or cars I do put my toddler in the buggy (she hates it). However, if I’m nipping into Tesco Express for a loaf of bread I don’t. However, I do make sure she holds my hand.

The big difference is in a crowd all those other people can be seen, a 2 year old carnt so for their safety it makes sense to protect them. The OP is not coming across lime a big important adult who screams at kids, not at all

YANBU
They can practise walking/climbing elsewhere

ThePlantsitter
the disgusting attitude is from the entitled idiots who think it's amusing to make others miss their train. How hard is it, really, to get out of the way?

Most of us manage. Just give it a try, next time you might be the one trying to catch a train.

plus wits end you mention your 2 year olds right to choice. You also need to teach consideration for others and that sometimessage his choice cannot be accommodated because it's a dangerous situation. If you don't do this you will end up with a 10 year old who expects everything their way NOW. Not desirable.

Don't assume you know anything about me JosefKeller.

You have no idea how easy or difficult it is for anyone to 'get out of the fucking way' and to think you do is breathtakingly 'entitled'.

You are not more important than anyone else.

ThePlantsitter

neither are you.

It's very easy to get out of the way, don't go in the middle of everyone in the first place. Pretending otherwise is very entitled. Why are you trying to justify rudeness?

Me rushing to catching a train, or being on my phone on the side - so out of the fucking way - doesn't affect you in the slightest. See how easy that is?

It's not being entitled to want to catch a train or tube in a station, that's literally what people are there for

Toddlers I can cope with.

People who stand on the left of the escalator, on the other hand, should be vapourised.

Just curious OP, what makes you think you have more of a right to walk where you want to, when you want to, than a child of any age? Or in fact anyone with limited mobility or unpredictability (elderly, SN, physical disabilities whether permanent or temporary)

Usually the same kind of person who doesn't think twice about holding people up themselves.

I used to have a job where on occasion if it was really really busy then staff would take it in turns to go onto the floor and try and help people. So we could direct them to the right place or help them do what they came in to do so when they got to the counter they were all set. In fact we could even do it while you are in the queue already.Help keep the queue moving so no one had to wait to long and any questions they had could be answered..but no thats not good enough. People turn down your help and join the queue , moan about the length of the queue and how.long it takes and join all the others who dont want to be seen dead talking to lowly shop staff.

People dont even want to try and help themselves by getting prepared before you join the queue or saying excuse me. They just want to moan.

I always take my toddler in the buggy if we going on the tube he's safer in the buggy than roaming free.

I didn't say I was. That 'get out of the fucking way' implies you are.

In the example it's narrow enough steps that a parent and child walking hand in hand blocks the route. You know nothing about how easy or difficult it is for them to get out of the way unless you ask.

Rudeness is huffing and puffing and having an attitude that says your punctuality is more important than their existence. Rudeness is assuming that people are being 'entitled' rather than doing what they have to do.

YANBU but I live in London and there are plenty of grown adults who seem to fanny about and walk at the speed of a snail.