To ask for your help? DD aged 3 is overweight!

[LumiereLight]

DD is almost 4 and absolutely loves food. She asks for food constantly throughout the day and I often have to refuse. She doesn’t seem to reach the point of being full.

She loves porridge for breakfast. She eats oranges, apples, bananas, eggs, whole meal bread, home-cooked meals, plenty of veg, yoghurts, cheese, beef, chicken etc. The problem is, most days she cries for more and I have to tell her she can’t have anything else which makes her upset.

According to the NHS child’s BMI calculator, she is overweight (92nd centile). According to her growth charts, she is in the 25th centile for height and the 75th centile for weight.

Just for context, my older daughter who is 6 is in the 9th centile on the BMI calculator and DH and I are also both slim.

I’m just really struggling with the volume of food DD2 wants to eat. I give her nowhere near as much as she wants and yet she’s still overweight. What can I do to help get this under control?

I’m so grateful for your help.

Have you been told by a health visitor or doctor she is overweight?

How active is she? My two year old runs around so much that I think she burns all her food off (and that is a worry for me!), I would expect as a three year old she's very active?

Does she burn all her energy? Is she due a growth spurt? My 3yo dd could out eat her Dad before she shoots up and the only time she is totally still is when she sleeps.

If you are worried take her to see her Health visitor and they can advise

She’s definitely not as active as my older DD. We take her to swimming and she does dance classes. She enjoys a run around at the park, but she struggles with tiredness. As a baby she was barely awake which concerned me but she has always met all her milestones. When she gets tired she starts to fall over a lot so tends to sit down to rest. She’ll say “mummy, I’ve got wobbly legs”. She still naps a few days a week (when she’s not at nursery).

She’s also not the best with walking a distance. Will ask to be carried.

She hasn’t seen a health visitor or doctor for quite some time so no, no one has commented on her weight.

Take her to the GP. There might be an underlying reason she is so hungry, as well as tired.

She’s consistently been overweight for about the last year. I have tried to improve her diet as much as possible but I think the issue is the volume of food she wants to eat. I think she enjoys eating so wants to eat all the time, rather than eating because she’s hungry. She will eat and finish any food given to her in any quantity.

In all honesty, now I think of it I think she’s always been overweight but always fallen within the weight centiles so the HV never said anything about it when she was younger as they didn’t ever measure her height.

What’s wrong with being on the 75th centile for weight? I don’t really understand how you’ve come to the conclusion that she’s overweight? It’s never occurred to me to look up my child’s bmi, does she look overweight? Active children do want a lot of food, And lots want to eat more frequently than we would do.

Im sorry if this sounds harsh but she's three. You know she's overweight so you restrict the amount of food you're giving to her. If she asks again or cries then you need to distract her with something else.

Could she genuinely have sore legs or feet? Double jointed maybe?

I was expecting her to be eating processed foods that made her crave more but her diet sounds excellent so I would wonder about ruling out anything underlying too as crying for more does sound unusual. I do hope you get an answer.

You will get two types of response here.

1. YABU. Your adorable ickle podgy sausage legs is just a babba. Leave her alone.

1. YABU. You are abusing your child. Stop feeding her cheesy wotsits intravenously!

I’d be more concerned by the loss of balance/falling over when tired. This seems quite unusual for a 3 year old, quite extreme for just tiredness particularly for a child who isn’t that active? I think a trip to the GP might be in order just to rule out anything else underlying.

The reason I’ve looked up her bmi is because I am massively restricting her food intake and feeding her as best as I can and she is frequently crying saying she’s really hungry. She looks chubby at the moment. I just feel like I’m fighting a losing battle trying to feed her a healthy satisfying diet and limiting her food intake and she’s always crying for me to give her more. If I gave her the amount of food she wants, she would be huge. I just don’t know what else I can do?

I have a DD the same age and something doesn’t sound right to me regarding her tiredness, napping, needing to sit down etc... It might be linked to food - I’m not sure.

I’d take her to the gp with your concerns and see what (s)he says.

I’ll call the GP in the morning.

You're so helpful minty

OP her diet as you describe sounds excellent. I would also ask for a GP appt to ensure that her hunger, tiredness etc is nothing more.

No family history of diabetes?

Go to the GP. There could be an underlying reason.

What do you mean when you say you’re massively restricting her food intake? What is she actually eating on a normal day?

Sounds worth a trip to the HVs/GP. There can be issues that make movement more difficult and painful. If she's moving less, she needs to eat a bit less.

It is easy to over estimate portion size. In a lazy moment recently, I used one of the children's IKEA bowls for my tin of soup and realised that the whole tin fitted in it! It's easily the same capacity as my old 1980s standard bowl.

With my DCs, eating times are structured. It's not so much no snacks, but we have a "light tea" at the table between lunch and dinner rather than grazing. If she's had a good amount, say that's enough. Sometimes it takes a while to register what you've eaten is enough.

I agree that it sounds like a check up is wise.

Thanks for being so aware of her health.

I was allowed to be overweight and eat lots as a child and it's now been an issue my whole life.

Hope you get some answers. Sounds like you feed her a great diet. X

GP appt sounds sensible. I’ve found my toddlers go through periods where they just eat and eat but it’s very short lived and a noticeable growth spurt upwards usually follows. If it’s a long term thing it does sound a little odd.

What does she drink? All the sugar free drinks make your brain expect sugar/food, does she have a lot of squash?

The only thing in her diet is maybe the yoghurts; if she’s having petit filou or similar they are laden with sugar. As are frubes.

Would she accept some Greek yoghurt with a little
Chopped banana in it?

Walking is quite boring for kids but I used to stick a fat strip of tape down their arm on their coat doubles sided and we would have to hunt for 5 special things. A red leaf and yellow petal, a small stick, a grey pebble. You get the idea. And stick it on their coat. Kept my very reluctant walking dd engaged.