To ask for your help? DD aged 3 is overweight!

[LumiereLight]

DD is almost 4 and absolutely loves food. She asks for food constantly throughout the day and I often have to refuse. She doesn’t seem to reach the point of being full.

She loves porridge for breakfast. She eats oranges, apples, bananas, eggs, whole meal bread, home-cooked meals, plenty of veg, yoghurts, cheese, beef, chicken etc. The problem is, most days she cries for more and I have to tell her she can’t have anything else which makes her upset.

According to the NHS child’s BMI calculator, she is overweight (92nd centile). According to her growth charts, she is in the 25th centile for height and the 75th centile for weight.

Just for context, my older daughter who is 6 is in the 9th centile on the BMI calculator and DH and I are also both slim.

I’m just really struggling with the volume of food DD2 wants to eat. I give her nowhere near as much as she wants and yet she’s still overweight. What can I do to help get this under control?

I’m so grateful for your help.

Definitely agree about seeing the GP. If she's eating that much and still wants more then there could well be an underlying reason for it. Hope she's ok! It's such a worry at this age but you're doing all the right things!

I have a huge 3 year old. She’s always been huge and I’ve never restricted her food intake. We’ve had lots of comments from others about how much she eats. She’s in 6 year olds clothes that I have to shorten (at 1 she was the weight of an average 2 year old). She was on the 50th centile when born but gradually crept up to the 98th centile. No dr has ever suggested she has an issue and I figure she’ll one day lose the baby fat. I’m a size 8 and my husband is skinny. She’s happy and healthy just large. I’m really proud she’s big. As long as yours isn’t eating junk food I don’t see an issue. Is she tired because she’s hungry?

Sometimes you feel hungry when you're thirsty so perhaps offer her a drink sometimes instead of food.

Also video her walking when she "wobbly" so you have dated record and again in a month. Is she getting worse or same ?

@OoohTheStatsDontLie do you mean Prader–Willi syndrome?

Prader willi syndrome has increased appetite but other milestones would likely be missed.

People commenting "that's not a massive amount of food" haven't seen OP's portion sizes.

OP....are you giving her portions that are too large?

Both of my DD"s like food and would eat a lot...they don't get it though.

And portions are suitable for their age.

How large are her meals in general?

I’m really proud she’s big

That’s a bit strange. What if she doesn’t lose the weight? Or is an obese pre teen?

There’s not a lot of protein in her diet, or healthy fats. Both of which help with hunger a lot more than carbs/fruit/veg etc.

Agree with pp about booking a dr appointment for her. Hope you get to the bottom of it.

Seeing the GP sounds like a good first step. Other than that, something you can do to discourage snacking, is to make the snacks monotonous- it is much harder to chomp your way through a plate of carrot sticks, than a plate of carrot sticks, and cucumber and pepper slices fi. And swap fruit for vegetables.

But what you list doesnt sound excessive. Does she really never get cake, or a biscuit, or crisps? Because what you list sounds like the ideal rather than the reality (kudos for you if that is your reality).

My DD's friend was always overweight but wasn't diagnosed hypothyroid until she was 10. She now takes medication.

I'd get her checked out for low thyroid because this can cause learning difficulties if not treated.

That’s a bit strange. What if she doesn’t lose the weight? Or is an obese pre teen?

She’s big not just fat. She’s really active and fit and strong. I’m proud.

Her evening meal is definitely her biggest meal. I serve her a slightly smaller portion than I do my DD who is 6. The difference is, DD1 will often not finish hers but DD1 will finish her meal without fail. I wouldn’t say it’s a huge portion but definitely bigger than some I’ve seen served by other parents to kids her age. Tonight, for instance, she was asking for more immediately after dinner, then crying saying she was hungry about half an hour later. Then crying again when going to bed. I’d feel cruel to cut that portion size down.

have you tried a hot meal for lunch and a lighter dinner, ie switch her meals round? Also giving her a glass of whole milk during her snack time. Unless she’s begging for junk food she’s likely actually hungry

Some children do crave food and snacks more than others, and I think in that situation you do need to just say no, and distract them. I used to know a child like that - she didn’t have a medical syndrome but loved her food and would eat pretty much anything that was placed in front of her. Her parents had a very strict routine with portion control and meals only at set times to stop her constantly asking for more food.

I’m not sure if the 75th percentile means she’s overweight but you know your child best. Definitely a good idea to go to the GP if you’re concerned though?

But what I really came to say was a friends son had something similar with his legs etc and needing to be carried. Turns out he’s got hyper mobility so might be worth looking at

I don’t know how true it is, but a dietitian once told me that long term restricted diet can actually cause you to not lose weight because your body goes into “starvation” mode to preserve calories.

Does she like nuts and seeds? They are nutritious and filling, good for protein and fibre.....

This might sound patronising but have you just tried feeding her the amount that she’s asking for? Even for a week to see what happens?

She’s in 6 year olds clothes that I have to shorten (at 1 she was the weight of an average 2 year old).

Does she really never get cake, or a biscuit, or crisps? Because what you list sounds like the ideal rather than the reality (kudos for you if that is your reality).

That really is her reality although she gets something extra maybe once or twice a week. Maybe a slice of cake or a iced biscuit from the bakers.

It doesn’t look like that much

Does she have healthy snacks available to her whenever she is hungry?

Hard boiled eggs, crudités, nuts, cold chicken - stuff that isn’t high in calories but gives good energy?

Also Try and cut out the bread/crackers and replace with different carbs and see if she has any more energy. Baked beans, rice etc.

Every time she is hungry give her a cup of water, if she is still hungry afterwards give her food. If she rejects e.g. carrot sticks or a babybel, I’m guessing she isn’t really hungry.

I’m also on the side of that not being a lot of food. It’s very healthy diet food, but not filling.
Cucumber is brilliant, but not going to make anyone feel full.

Maybe she just wants a biscuit?

From my very limited experience podgy three year olds turn into lithe four year olds. As long as your not feeding then junk (and you’re absolutely not) it’s just puppy fat.

Sure, have a check with the hv/gp, but if your giving a well rounded diet time will sort everything out.

But also, give the poor child a biscuit and some chocolate.

Sounds like a lot of low calorie foods. Maybe she needs larger portions of protein rich foods

This problem has been ongoing ever since she weaned. When she was little she would cry for more food at the end of meals. I’d give her more but it wouldn’t make a difference. The meal ending was the issue regardless of how much I gave her. I discussed this with the health visitor way back then and in the end, we both felt it was best for me to control her portion sizes rather than to continually give her more (which didn’t solve the issue anyway). I should have mentioned that earlier but in all honesty, I’d forgotten all about it and it has just come back to me.

I don't think that's too much. It's just fruit and veg with a small portion of carbs and hardly any protein. I'd be giving her two slices of bread for a start.