To think who eats a family meal to themselves?!

[GimmeTheSnacks]

I made a meal this evening ready for tomorrow as the chicken needed cooking. It was cooling down on the side before putting it in the fridge. The next thing I know dp is home from work then walks in with a huge plate of it. It looked like a lot so I asked if he'd reheated the whole thing to which he replied "no I've saved ds (5) some as I know how much he likes it". I explained it was for tea tomorrow and he said I should have told him when he got home.

He has enough common sense to know I will have cooked it for another days meal so this was just so selfish. He can be selfish with food in terms of snacks but he's never done it with a meal before. There were 4 chicken breasts in it ffs!

Aibu to think this was out of order and selfish?

^^ good question. Would he kick off?

The man gets one chicken breast, half a packet of rice and some veg for his dinner and portions are tightly controlled.
Nothing is 'tightly portioned' about that meal.
Recommended serving size for chicken is a deck of cards. Most chicken breasts are 2/3 times the size of this.
Rice recommended serving is 1/2 a packet.
You may eat more than this but you're overeating. You may not like that fact, but it is a fact. Yes people who have physical jobs / taller / more muscle / higher metabolism in general need more food throughout the day to maintain their calorie expenditure but, unless OPs overweight husband is training to be an olympic athlete he does not need to eat 8x the recommended serving size of meat (plus rice and veg) AFTER his evening meal. I'm genuinely shocked the human stomach can fit that much food in it. A human eating this amount of food is not normal. And obviously it is contributing to his obesity. That is not fat shaming, that is STATING THE FUCKING OBVIOUS!

Yes he should also replace the family meal as it was HIS mistake to eat it. Whether it be 8 portions 16 portions or 2 portions. Even if it was a genuine mistake, surely, unless you're an entitled and selfish piece of shit, you would want to replace what you have taken away from the family? The effort that your partner has gone through to make that meal? I know my partner certainly would, but that's because he's a nice person.

Funny how it's always the same posters I see being deliberately provoking too...

@Bluntness100 you know full well that it's very easy to get fat on cheap, low quality stodge. When I've been overweight, it's too many pieces of toast between meals, or biscuits with a cuppa that have been the culprit.

"The man gets one chicken breast, half a packet of rice and some veg for his dinner and portions are tightly controlled."

No, he got curry made from FOUR chicken breasts & veg, plus rice
(bar a little he left for 1 DC)

He's very greedy and selfish, taking more than his fair share of the family food & budget

On a tangent, but why were people surprised that someone with a low budget for food could be overweight? A pack of biscuits a day (40p?) would do it. Or half a loaf of toast and peanut butter? Or 6 bags of crisps (£1 a day), pint of full fat milk. It all adds up to extra calories.

Why the puzzlement about how he got fat ?

He is habitually greedy, not just on this one occasion:

He eats 4 chicken breasts a couple of hours after already having had one supper
He orders McDonalds at work

He obviously eats far more calories than he burns and has too many giant meals per day.

If he can afford to buy himself McDonalds out of his own cash for lunch then I'd make a stand tonight and ask what he's buying you all for dinner. Why would he save a portion for just one child?! I'd be extremely pissed off if I'd meal-prepped for a family and then one adult ate it all – it's so selfish and smacks off the expectation that food just appears for him.

Add to that the fact you're breastfeeding and I'd be fuming. Perhaps time for another conversation about household meals/budgeting?

I've asked him to please think about the family food budget but he wastes it all on this crap so I have to budget and meal plan with what's left of my wages

Sorry but this made me FUME.

He's spending joint money on McDonald's crap every day meaning you have to budget to feed your children and sometimes go without food yourself: And on top of this he wolfs down a family-sised meal as a SNACK!??

Selfish, greedy BASTARD.

Selfish, greedy FAT BASTARD.

"still not convinced you are going without food for the sake of children and the big fat man of yours is eating 4 chicken breasts in one sitting"

Well, every OP could be lying in any AIBU post - and in reality be a bored 12-year-old,
but usually we base our answers on what the OP posts, unless we catch them out in obvious lies

If he did eat 4 chicken breasts as a second supper
If he scoffs whole packets of treats intended to be shared by the whole family
If he orders McDonalds and doesn't have the money left to replace dinner he ate, so the rest of the family can eat too

.... then he is greedy & selfish
and the only talk needed is that he needs to change this and only take his fair share of what they have available.

Wow you've gotten some weird answers here! I don't think you need to justify how you've made your curry or budgeted, your husband is a selfish prick. My ex was like this, different cause we didn't have kids, but I literally couldn't keep food in the house - anything for my lunch the next day, nice box of chocolates (which I would eat over the course of a week lets say) - would all be gone as soon as he saw it. He worked late nights so I would already be asleep. I had to hide my nice food from a grown man which felt fucking ridiculous. He'd always say 'oh I'll go out and buy more' if he ate all my treats. Did he fuck go out an buy more. Omg feeling the rage just thinking about it!

We eat a lot of chicken, but it's rare for us to eat 3 chicken breasts between 2 + toddler, usually we have 2 and one packet of rice, plus the veg. We had a small leftover portion from 4 breasts + veg in wraps between 2 men and me last week because we were all full. I didn't think we were scrimping, does somewhere do really tiny chicken breasts and we aren't all talking about the same portion size?

Both DH and I nearly always leave something for the other one if we're cooking so they don't feel left out when they get home and would definitely have had a taste. I can't imagine either of us taking a full portion without asking though, never mind taking effectively 3 portions without asking. It doesn't take much effort to make a curry so I usually wouldn't begrudge the food if he wanted it. If we were budgeting though or short of food for the next night it would of course be aggravating and he'd be sent to the 24 hour supermarket for more chicken breast and veg to work off his food.

As @Bluntness100 says though, we have men regularly featuring here as cheating or being abusive, so in that context it does seem like there are some over-reactions.

Can you stop paying towards anything for him eg groceries, just cook for you and dc and eat everything so he has nothing to raid when you’re back is turned.

Don’t do his laundry or cleaning or anything to make his life easier.

He doesn’t seem to give a shit about you or two of his three dc. Stop making his life easier.

He can make his own massive curries and eat them alone.

I’m also not surprised he’s fat. That’s not fat shaming either. But anyone who is in the habit of eating meals intended for several people shortly after eating his own meal will be fat. Be they man or woman.

I cannot believe anyone feels he is justified.

As for this being real, I used to have two dc cooked, cleaned and worked full time also with a breastfed baby. Was the worst time in my life but I couldn’t lose my job as I was married to an abusive man.
It happens, it’s amazing what some women will put up with.

Also I have teens with hollow legs and a DP who could keep eating if food tastes good. But they don’t. They don’t eat food I’ve batch cooked waiting to go in the freezer, they don’t eat meals I’ve made for the whole family all by themselves.
Never felt I’d feel lucky typing that, I always thought that was normal.

I mean so sorry you’re living like this op

I had a colleague who bought his food in Waitrose. His wife bough her's and their kids' food in Tesco. He was also a complete twat.

The other thing my x used to do was woof the birthday cake that kids had brought home from parties. If they’d put it aside for later, or id told them to wait til after dinner, it would be gone.

Recently dd went to a sushi making party (she’s 11 now) while staying with x. Came home and put some sushi in the fridge to have later. Went she went back for it later he’d only woofed it! Greedy git.

Chances are though if she stops buying and cooking for him, he will still eat and this will cost the op even more time and money.

And who the fuck sees a pack of 4 chocolate bars in the house and eat all of them, knowing the other 3 bars aren’t there’s?

Oops I forgot. One for his stomach, one for his cock, and 2 for his bollocks. Wonder if he thought that whilst scoffing down the meal.

Would it be still no big deal if op had made a lasagne for them all for example?

I’ve spoken about my greedy fucker ex. He would eat And drink everything on site without giving a fcuk about the others. In the end I did have to ration actual snacks and give everyone a snack box. Otherwise no one would have a thing.

An issue I found with him was he didn’t eat food, he inhaled it. We stop to chew food. Him, like others mentioned on here seem to have a total lack of ability to do so.

pandora101 if you think I'm a troll why post? Who on earth would make a thread like this up? Are you quite sure your ok?

You're*

An issue I found with him was he didn’t eat food, he inhaled it. We stop to chew food

^^
Yes what is that?

Wow, pandora, you've been deleted twice on this thread alone for troll hunting and are still doing it, with passive aggressive smilies at the end. If you are 'still not convinced' you to go HQ and report the thread, to post otherwise as you are is troll-hunting.

Just report troll-hunters, Gimme, don't engage.

My lasagne dish is huge and easily does 4 meals for 2, or one meal for 8. DH would try and eat it all in one day, whereas I would want to save some for the next day. The person who doesn’t cook it doesn’t realise the effort it takes. DH does cook but things like steak that can’t be eaten the next day.

I don’t understand why, of all the fucking insane things that are posted on AIBU, pandora has decided that this fairly benign post about a man who eats too much food is the obvious candidate for troll hunting.

Some people eat too much.
Some people are selfish.
Some people are on tight budgets and sometimes have to go without food in order for their children to eat.

For me, I would want to know how he responded. Sorry? Defensive? Going to make it up to you? I also work and meal plan and would be annoyed

I have no idea why the inhalers do it rather than chew.
I reckon the inhaling thing plays a massive part on hunger, hence they can eat masses without feeling full.