To think the use of prostitutes just isn't that big a deal?

[Hihothedairyo]

Now here me out first, I do not mean married men who use prostitutes without the knowledge/consent of their wives/partners. Those are scum, I have been cheated on in that way before so believe me when I say I do not agree with that.

However, I've seen and heard a lot of people (including friends of mine) who believe that men in general who use prostitutes are scum.

Personally, I think that, provided you are sure the person you are having sex with is not being trafficked, then you are really just two consenting adults having sex. Yes there is money exchanged, but nobody is forcing the sex worker to do this job (in this scenario, I know that DOES happen).

Should a person who's say, 30 years old and still a virgin, and now feels their too old and too inexperienced to go out and find a woman to have sex with them, not be able to use a service that a woman is willingly providing? What about someone with some form of disability that wants sex but doesn't have the confidence or whatever to get it normally?

I've got a good friend who lost his virginity to a prostitute, and has visited them a few other times also. He's in a happy relationship now and does not use them and never has while in any relationship. I don't feel that him having used them was wrong, but he is not open about having used them at all and I'm pretty sure his partner doesn't know that he ever has.

I just feel there is far too much judgement and hate towards people who are, in reality, just doing something that has been done since time began. And I see no wrong in it, I imagine I'm in the minority here though.

No, I am not equating the two. You were the one who said providing any sexual service for pay is prostitution. Working in a sex shop and providing what customers want is providing a service relating to sex, for pay. So by your own argument, you are equating the two. Not me!

Prostitution is the selling of sex for cash. If you aren't selling the physical.act of.sex then it isn't prostitution. You can think it's a terrible job, degrading, whatever, that's entirely up to you. But it isn't accurate to say being a Dominatrix is prostitution.

I.merely used your logic.of "providing a sexual service for pay" to demonstrate that that would include Ann Summers workers, sex line workers, ooh and strippers, page 3 girls etc. Are they prostitutes? Nope!

Sorry, the male Doms who see female Subs Think they are prostitutes with no power? Ha!

The number of women who pay for sexual encounters, whether vanilla or kink, is minuscule compared to men. Always has been, always will be.

There is a reason we call them ‘Johns’ and not ‘Janes’.

SirChing if you don't consider what your friend did as prostitution, why the fuck are you posting on this thread? By your admission, being a Dominatrix is not prostitution so your stories of your successful mate have NOTHING to do with this thread?

To suggest (not that you personally have, I mean in general) that ALL sex workers fit a particular set of predisposing circumstances is, however, at least in my experience, wrong

Does that make it ok though? How many “Marthas” is acceptable?

And selling a vibrator is not selling sexual services...ffs. What angle are you coming from? Any one who enjoys orgasms must support prostitution? I don't understand

Havent read the whole thread so please excuse me .
What about women who vist male prostitutes ?
Men who vist male prostitutes? Or tv/ts prostitutes?
Are they classed as bad as men visiting females ?
Also get tired of hearing about the young females who advertise on suger baby /suger daddy sites but claim their not prostitutes..yes love you are .

Ann Summers workers, sex line workers, ooh and strippers, page 3 girls etc. Are they prostitutes? Nope!

I’ve more or less done all these, except it was a posh, independent sex shop aimed at women. Never done page 3 though. Thank fuck for that! Much harder to leave it all behind you when there are photos/video evidence.

No, these aren’t all the same as prostitution. The shop and the phone line were ordinary PAYE jobs. The stripping led to prostitution. Most strip clubs are fronts for organised crime, sadly. Domme-ing is far more like prostitution than the other activities, it often involves sex acts, handling another person’s genitals, bodily fluids etc. Both are cash in hand (well, I had cheques as tips a couple of times, but you’d be stupid to accept anything that can be stopped/charged back later as actual pay. One cheque was for 10,000 US dollars. I was amazed when it cleared).

This is why I hate the term ‘sex worker’ because it really does lump it all in together. A phone sex operator in a call centre is very different to being a prostitute. A prostitute and a domme though? Not so different, and very often the exact same woman in a different outfit.

@MostTacticalNameChange Which is precisely why I said I would STFU about it as It's derailimg. Until some one else commented on it

I think you will find that as you were the one saying that providing a sexual service for money = prostitution, it's you who have made false equivalence. Me highlighting their absurdity doesn't mean I view those activities in the same way.

Havent read the whole thread so please excuse me

It’s your post that needs excusing, not your lack of reading.

Not so different, and very often the exact same woman in a different outfit Apart from the not having sex aspect? Sure - identical

If some Dommes are also prostitutes that's up to them. None of the many that I know are. Because they don't have sex with the clients. It certainly isn't usual to do so AT ALL.

It does piss me off that the two are conflated as one involves letting a client enter their body with their penis, and one doesn't.

Sex isn’t just penetration with a penis though, otherwise lesbians would be virgins!

As someone who has done both, I think penetration/no penetration is a very arbitrary line to draw, and one that the law wouldn’t recognise, hence the non specific term ‘sex act’.

@DuLANGMondeFOREVER

You would be just as accurate calling strippers and pole dancers prostitutes. That SOME sell sex on the side doesn't make selling sex an integral part of the job

Likewise for Dommes. All the ones I know would be furious to be equated to prostitutes as they will not allow their client's penis access to their body. At all. Ever.

SirChing would you class a domme as a sex worker though? Genuine question, as I don't know the answer.

We get it; you think that buying the use of a woman's body is not a big deal.
Is it ok to buy a kidney?

Sex isn’t just penetration with a penis though, otherwise lesbians would be virgins!

Which is why you don't get many female lesbians using prostitiutes.

Does a woman touch a man's penis with the intent of making him orgasm through her direct action? If yes, she is a prostitute. If no, she isn't.

Dommes may touch a man's penis to insert something in it or whatever, but she isn't wanking him off, giving oral, or allowing his cock inside any of her orifices. Therefore not prostitution.

I can see that some people may have blurred boundaries, perhaps from past experience, but I honestly don't know any Dommes who would dream of directly using their own bodily orifice or hand to make a man cum.

@SmileEachDay sooo sorry I bothered you by posting on here .
I missed the meno which said I couldnt post or dare to have an opinion.

@Hihothedairyo Absolutely I would call her a sex worker. But not a prostitute as she isn't letting a man's penis use her mouth, hands or other orifice to ejaculate into.

He might be so turned on that he cums anyway, or he may masturbate himself, but the woman do that for him.

The Domme is selling the means to turn the man on. A prostitute is accepting the result of that into her body. That's the huge difference.

I know some prostitutes like to equate the two as being the same, but it really isn't. A Dominatrix will never have to go for an STI check, keeps condoms handy, or worry about pregnancy. Being on her period won't affect her ability to work. Why? Because she isn't selling sex!

I missed the meno which said I couldnt post or dare to have an opinion

You didn’t give your opinion about prostituted women though. You just said “what about...”.

What do you think about women who men pay to rape?

*Women DON'T do that for him

A hand job is still a hand job, whether it’s done by a prostitution in a car park or by a domme wearing a leather glove. You can try and justify it anyway you like but it’s still a man buying an orgasm from a woman, who probably wouldn’t touch him with someone else’s barge pole if he wasn’t paying 🤷‍♀️

The subby men are the most controlling of all punters, in my experience. They come with elaborate fantasies that they want you to act out perfectly - do so much as call them ‘sissy’ when they specified they wanted ‘worm’ and their true narcissistic self comes angrily tumbling out. They think that the more they pay, the more bespoke their experience should be. They are the ones in control, same as every other John.
The domme is just a character they wrote for their own subby sex play.

You can act like kink prostitution is somehow better than vanilla prostitution all you like, but it’s all abhorrent, and it’s all bad for women as a class (and bad for relationships between the sexes too).

A hand job is still a hand job, whether it’s done by a prostitution in a car park or by a domme wearing a leather glove

I don't mean to be rude but did you read what I wrote? NONE of the Dommes I know even give hand jobs. They don't NEED to. That isn't what they are being paid for. If men want that, they can go to a prostitute.

You can think it's bad for women as a class etc, disgusting, all that I will accept.

But the fact that the vast majority of Dommes DON'T use their body to make a man ejaculate, means they aren't prostitutes. They are neither providing oral, or wanking the man off, or allowing him to insert his penis into her body.

So, I must be really thick here, but which bit of NOT letting men do that makes her a prostitute.

If some prostitutes want to provide Kink services too that's up to them, and it doesn't surprise me one bit that they would think "wanking a man off in a leather glove" was the norm. But it really isn't. Certainly.not amongst the ones I know. They would be horrified at your assertions. Like I said, they will never need an STI check not will they even get repetitive strain from wanking men off. Because they don't do it.

That some YOU know obviously do, doesn't make it the norm. I know NO Domme who would ever directly stimulate a penis to orgasm. Bleurgh!

We get it; you think that buying the use of a woman's body is not a big deal.
Is it ok to buy a kidney?

As a supporter/apologist for prostitution I would say "no" to this. I think it's a rather different transaction.

Maybe it's the case that some prostitutes may provide Kink services. But that not all women who provide Kink services are prostitutes.

Some (very few).pole dancers may be prostitutes. That doesn't make all prostitutes poll dancers!

There is so much false equivalency here, and I am fairly sure that trying to lump.all.women who have ever provided any sexual service into the category of "prostitute", makes some people feel better. It doesn't make it true though.

How anyone can be a prostitute when they refuse to stimulate a penis to orgasm is absolutely beyond me.

We get it; you think that buying the use of a woman's body is not a big deal.
Is it ok to buy a kidney?

Nope.

OP you are humiliating yourself, it’s so cringey to watch. Prostituted women are not doing it ‘by choice’ and your droning on about the word ‘choice’ is making yourself look really bad. No one owes you ‘a debate’ or ‘educating’ as you demanded a PP provide for you, paying to rape women is not acceptable ever. Paying for consent is coerced sex. Rape. You are thinking up reasons where it’s ok for some dude to rape women. There are no words harsh enough for that.