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Got drunk last night - had to be driven home and put to bed.

143 replies

glitteryboots · 02/02/2020 19:17

Please give me some of your drunk stories to make me feel better - was only round at a friend's house and her husband's measures are lethal! Should have known before I went but I never learn.

OP posts:
Justaboy · 03/02/2020 12:25

I think theres a good opening for someone to make a portabel sick bag.

I'd be modelled on a horses nose bag two "hooks" to go around the ears and then a waterproof plastic bag with a leak proof zipper so you'd honk your ring piece then discretly put it in your handbag and dispose of it when your less indisposed?

There!, wort a few quid for the idea?

Cheques payable to;

Honk your ring Ltd

.

easyandy101 · 03/02/2020 12:42

Went out for drinks in Camden, was a pretty big night.

Arrived home around 2am with no recollection of how i got there, covered in mud and with a car tyre print on my arm 🤷‍♂️

Urkiddingright · 03/02/2020 12:43

I dated a guy for a while once when I was much younger who in hindsight was an absolute loser but I was head over heels with him for some reason. Anyway, I liked him a lot and was eager to impress so I went to a gig with him one night which was bloody awful so I got very drunk to blank out the atrocious band Grin. I reckon I had about eight pints of beer in the end, I was wasted. We got back to his and were about to get down and dirty when I realised I needed to vomit. I was semi naked and about to vomit into his mouth so had to run to the loo. Anyway, worst thing was his flat mate walked in on me spewing with no top half on Grin, I was absolutely mortified.

FishCanFly · 03/02/2020 12:46

Drunken mystery from my youth. I got home and there was BLOOD on my coat. I wasn't hurt. I phoned my friends who were with me - nobody was hurt. So where did it come from? Confused

Ellybellboo · 03/02/2020 13:16

Was at a party in my neighbour’s house - their house has the same layout as ours but opposite if that makes sense. Upstairs in our house we had a bathroom on one side of the landing and then directly opposite was a huge, walk in cupboard (relevant)

Started off fine until someone got the tequila out - tequila and I do not get on - I end up very pissed, very quickly

I felt really sick so ran upstairs to the bathroom, just in time to puke. All of a sudden the door flies open and my DH is standing there looking at me utterly horrified. I grumble about not being able to puke in peace, then slam the door shut - followed by the slow horror when I realise I’m actually in their cupboard puking over their Vax

Justaboy · 03/02/2020 13:17

Vomit disposal a true "tail"

Years ago used to have rather wild weekend parties or booze ups really out in the wilds of Norfolk tha the wifes parents place c/ all the family who'd stay the weekend.

One time we had the local vicars son there, a very quiet studious and serious chap I don't think he'd touched a drop in his life. Later on that evening he was suddenly violently sick in the living room on mothers expensive newly laid carpet a sort of row broke out as to who was to clean it up as he was in no fit state.

So the crew went to get a pan and mop bucket etc then one of them fell arse over head down the stairs and was sick too..

Anyway when they got back the carpet had not a trace on it anywhere so who had cleared it up?, there was only the vicars son and my pet dog who came over over the weekend, there were lovely walks to be had there and lots of rabbits to chase etc.

Anyway the dog looked very smug.

Course you can imagine who it was who cleared up the warmed up pre digested food can't you;?.

OldQueen1969 · 03/02/2020 13:31

Ooh, you have my sympathy OP..... I was less than decorous on Saturday night myself, though fortunately no harm no foul despite spat with DP and Sunday spent feeling very sorry for myself......

When I went off to college at 19 I had led a fairly sheltered life - am an only child with a fiercely principled and protective mother. I got into the tech side of a fairly prestigious drama school, and the course was populated by hardened alternative drinkers. Wanting to fit in, on a night out at our local in Crouch End, I accepted a tequila shot challenge from a robust rugby playing Welsh guy on the course. My tipple of choice had been vodka when I was out "drinking" up to that point, but I had never tried tequila, but hey, how dangerous could it be? Well......... I managed 16 shots. In a rather stupidly short space of time. I felt absolutely fine. Then I rose from my stool and the floor smacked me solidly in the face. I was hustled outside by my course mates before we could be ejected, and the eruption of vesuvius commenced. Earlier in the evening I had drunk some snakebite and black - cue my panicky companions thinking I was vomiting blood and attempting to call an ambulance - which was refused as I was patently just drunk. I was squished into the back of someone's VW bug, taken back to my one room digs, put to bed and I remember very little of anything until the next morning, when I awoke, feeling absolutely fine, and breezed into the college canteen at 10.30. This gave me something of a God like status amongst my peers but was of course only down to the fact that there wasn't a scrap of alcohol left in my system. I am now 51 - only in the last two years have I been able to even sniff tequila without an involuntary urge to vomit.

My second story is somewhat shameful, and I learned a valuable lesson from it. I was married to a biker, and my son was about 8. We had gone to a local rally that was a family friendly affair but did have alcohol on site. My marriage wasn't the greatest, and one of my ex-husbands female friends wasn't helping. She felt I was a bit uptight and prissy, so just having a couple of single measures didn't cut it for her, despite my wanting not to be incapacitated around my son, although ExDH was driving and also sober, however, untied parental front and all that...... So, "Friend" started topping up my drink with some ready mixed that she had brought and I lost track of my consumption. We were all having a nice time and it was still fairly early in the evening - i was dancing and socialising and then the alcohol seemed to hit me like a tone of bricks. I was helped into our white van which had a rear bench seat for my son, and off we toddled. Going up a stretch of dual carriageway and approaching a roundabout, I knew I was going to be sick and asked ExDH to pull over - obviously he couldn't, so in mortified desperation I made a half hearted attempt at opening the wind down window which failed utterly. My son was surprisingly quick witted and managed to shift out of the back spray as everything coated the inside of the window....... the van was still faintly malodorous when we sold it months later. Obviously it was not my finest hour - however, my son, now 25 seems to have turned out fine and I do still, on occasion apologise to him when it crops up in "hilarious" reminiscences. Needless to say, ditching the Ex DH and the "friend" improved my life choices massively.

I am still a social drinker, and am very aware of my limits now - I have been a consistently "happy" drunk for a long time. I am currently under alot of stress, and finding that even a small amount of alcohol is nudging my demons out so I am starting a period of abstinence while I try and level out my emotions...... but it can be so hard socially with our accepted drinking culture...... it almost seems like a challenge to some people if you ask for a soft drink or water to try and coax you into party mode...... the answer should be moderation in all things, but hey, we're only human, and even animals go for broke sometimes on fermented fruit etc.....drunk squirrels are very funny indeed.......

PrincessHoneysuckle · 03/02/2020 13:54

Went on a random Tuesday night out with a friend as had booked the next day off.We decided to drink cocktails and I got paralytic.The next morning I had a hungover flashback of a man in my porch (thankfully not a euphemism) and told exh as was worried.He checked my phone and saw several missed calls so rung them back.The mystery man in the porch was a taxi driver who I couldn't pay as i was too drunk and i owed him £8.He came round later for it and i sheepishly handed the money over,apologising profusely.

x2boys · 03/02/2020 16:13

At tequila OldQueen, there was a pub on Oxford road in Manchester That had different offer,s on different days when I was a,student Nurse in the 90,s I think tequila night was on a Tuesday 50 p a,shot you can imagine the carnage 😂 my friend had 22 shots once she was very ill.

IcedPurple · 03/02/2020 16:14

Has anyone been on to say how disgusting it is that British people get drunk so much and how everyone is so much more civilised 'on the continent'?

IcedPurple · 03/02/2020 16:31

The story about the woman being carried out of the Moscow Metro by two Russian men with her bleeding arse on show wins the prize!

Hippyshubbie · 04/02/2020 00:38

Um... GCSE results night. Drank a bottle of Christmas dregs that a friend had collected, they didn't fancy it after starting it. I ended up being jogged around the housing estate... then we went to the pub and I fell asleep in the loo and my friend had to break in to wake me. Pub were not impressed, in retrospect they probably thought we were a gay couple who had been a little distracted.

Sixth form Christmas night out. Got home, tripped over the top step... threw up in front of my tee total Grandma... Dad wasn't impressed. I insisted I'd clean it up. He insisted I'd go to bed.

6ft 6inch, 30 stone biker appears at my door at uni wearing a face mask and carrying an axe... he tells me I'm going to a fancy dress party... we ignored the sci-fi theme and he got his axe confiscated. Turns out that Kirk was right about Romulan Ale... blue vomit everywhere, a collection of 30 pint glasses (he had a big coat and no lining to the pocket) and little memory between the knock on the door and waking to find said vomit and glasses.

I'll leave it there...

charlieschocolate · 04/02/2020 01:56

I asked my mum how much it took to get drunk when I was 13. About 3 glasses. I thought she meant full of spirits. I didn't realise about mixers. That was my first drunk experience.

Happy101 · 04/02/2020 02:07

Got so drunk, I ended up crying to one of my DH's friends about an illness I over-exaggerated. No idea why I decided to act like I was dying, or then proceed to ugly cry. Cringe about it to this day.

anon2000000000 · 04/02/2020 02:33

2 winters ago on a Christmas night out I drank far too much. It was very icy and for some reason I had decided to scrape cocks onto the windscreens of cars in my street. Every single one.

Dyrne · 04/02/2020 07:56

anon2000000000 to be fair, that would have given me sick a giggle to come out and find that in my car in the morning!

Dyrne · 04/02/2020 07:56

*such a giggle, not sick!

Ravenesque · 04/02/2020 19:00

@anon2000000000, that has brought a long-ago drunken walk home right back to me with the horror.

Friend and I walking back from the pub in the snow. We start writing swears in the snow on car windscreens. No biggy until I start on one windscreen and it completely cracks. I've no idea how/why it happened. I wasn't leaning hard or pushing hard or anything like that, but it broke and we were both mouth open in shock and fear and trying to run away, but slipping and sliding the in snow. Obviously, if I was a decent human being and not drunk, I would have tried to find out whose car it was or left a note on the (cracked) windscreen. But I wasn't and I was so after slipping, falling over and eventually getting some traction in the snow we legged it. Remembering this I feel the shame all over again.

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