To be annoyed by shopping as a family outing?

[Sweetbabycheezits]

I normally do the food shop on Saturday or Sunday morning. It's not rammed, but it's fairly busy, and one of the things that makes it so busy is entire families grocery shopping together. Yesterday, it was mum, dad and 3 kids maybe 5/6 and under...why?? The kids were bored and whingy, in the way, touching everything on the shelves. Surely one parent can stay home with kids, and one can do the shopping? I totally understand lone parents who work in the week having to take the kids along, but can't for the life of me understand why on earth the whole family needs to go? I'm probably just grumpy lol, so it could be that IABU...

@JKScot4 — I’m sorry you are so closed to the idea of different people doing things a bit differently than you. If you think letting your kids have an opinion is that unbelievable your world must be small. Perhaps my story will open your eyes a bit.

One of my children is a truly terrible eater and the other one isn’t great either. I was wasting a LOT of food by bringing things home and they would refuse (even if they liked it last week!). My son’s eating therapist suggested we bring him shopping so he could feel some control over what he eats, see new things that might appeal, and we can talk with him about healthy choices. It’s made a real difference with all both of my kids. We’ve tried things like mangosteen and millet and fresh ground almond butter, that I never thought of getting and the kids didn’t know existed. We plan meals together while we shop. I think it’s great for all kids to be involved and I can’t imagine looking at it as a negative.

THAT BEING SAID — I totally agree with the OP. We shop on weekday evenings after 7, when the shops are totally dead. I would never ever bring my kids at a time when they could get in others’ way.

The irony is that another thread a poster is asking about how to clean pillows and duvets because she was never shown how to housekeep as a child.

Kids need to experience regularly every day occupational routines how else are they supposed to learn to adult ?

I can understand it's annoying to some and the kids are bored but they need to be involved to learn and experience the world around them. Ideally the parents should get them involved in getting items.

and on another thread posters are fainting at the idea of leaving a 16 and 13 year old alone...

I don't understand. I can't think when I've ever been inconvenienced by a family doing their shopping together.
There was a kid in a trolley in Tesco having a bit of a tantrum yesterday. The only reason I noticed was because that's an unusual event.

If someone as easily irritated as me (a grumpy 63 year old) hasn't every been troubled by this, it can't be a massive problem, surely?

Maybe don’t go on Sat or Sun morning when you know it’s going to be busy with families? Why do you think everyone should dance to your tune?

We all go together. I don’t really know why, I’ve never thought about it. We like each other and enjoying being together I guess? We’re all at school or work Mon - Fri. Our supermarket has a cafe and we often have lunch together then do the shop. DC help with getting things from the list. I did the same with my Mum.

I think it’s really odd that it bothers you so much.

Kids are annoying, but so are people in general.

I can't for the life of me understand why people wait for Saturday or Sunday to do their shopping, so there you go.

I love MN 🤣

Yabu - I go shopping with dh and kids sometimes for lots of different reasons. If you don’t like it online shop. Some people just love a good moan.

I would have thought that if Muchbetternow's was really tired then it would be easier and less stressful to go shopping alone than with kids in tow? Or to get online shopping delivered? Or teach his wife to drive?

How about you all go shopping together, and then while one of you does the running about with a trolley round Tescos or wherever, the other takes the kids and goes and sits in a coffee shop somewhere?

No... Wait... Er...

We do this from time to time, usually when we shop at Tesco and the 3 DC can do the picking and scanning. We're careful to make sure they don't get in the way, they enjoy it and it teaches them to make decisions and about the value of money. Don't tar everyone with the same brush.

I do see a few sour faces looking at us on occasion and I hate to say it but it is usually middle aged women. Strange.

Oops, posted prematurely.

*some modicum of control and
*In fairness, lone shoppers/couples can also be prone to dithering, obstruction, lack of spatial awareness etc...

My DD likes going with me. She takes her own list and likes to choose e.g. what pasta we're buying. I think that's a good thing and dont get those people mocking @AnnieOH1 I like my kids to be involved in choosing what we eat and what we cook. What's wrong with that?
And I agree with PP not everything you do with kids has to be about what is most fun for them. It's important they learn what needs to be done to keep everything functioning.
But they should be under control. Not running around tearing up the place.

It sounds as though the issue is not that the children are in the supermarket, but that they're not behaving appropriately - they shouldn't be touching things that they don't intend to buy or running round, or being noisy. Obviously there will be some children with conditions/disabilities that make it difficult to behave appropriately but generally speaking the parents need to be teaching them appropriate behaviour in shops. No one minds children in shops if they're walking quietly with their parents, talking at normal volume or politely helping to load the trolley.

Christ so much judgement on one thread

I'm trying to imagine the little darlings whose parents are protecting them from the big bad supermarkets, as teenagers/young adults.

I expect they'll be the ones wandering around with their phones...Facetiming their parents or wives and husbands, because they don't have a clue about grocery shopping.

Before I started doing online shopping we used to shop together with the kids, I tried sending him to do the shopping but he was useless! Came home with short dated stuff or the wrong thing all the time and that was after he'd rung me 20 times to ask what he should get/ what did this mean on the list. I don't drive so couldn't go on my own. I really got fed up of not getting what I wanted or had asked for. I started doing the online shop as it was easier but still end up having to get him to pop me to the supermarket some weeks as the online shop can be hit and miss!

I'd say the problem here is yours. If you don't like being around families you could have your groceries delivered or go late at night. I don't think you can say that family groups should not go shopping together!

Top tip OP.

Do it online.

I can't drive and I enjoy doing the food shopping so DH has to come as well.

I let DS (almost 4) choose some of the food too, makes him not ask for toys/sweets and teaches him about healthy eating etc.

I often took my kids. They liked helping, they liked making (restricted) decisions about what we should get, they learned the value of things and they grew up capable of operating in the real world.

Seriously, kids are now spending their pre-school years in nursery rather than out in the community, and now people are saying they shouldn't be out shopping? When are they supposed to learn what llife is about and how to behave in different settings and around strangers?

I never ever gave this a thought and did not know anyone else did till I joined here.

I see kids bored in coffee shops all the time, but that is somehow acceptable because lots of middle class mums go there.

*I'm trying to imagine the little darlings whose parents are protecting them from the big bad supermarkets, as teenagers/young adults.

I expect they'll be the ones wandering around with their phones...Facetiming their parents or wives and husbands, because they don't have a clue about grocery shopping.*
This . Exactly this