To leave him to cry 😢

[cadburyegg]

DS2 was one of those awesome babies who slept through from 10 weeks but by the time he was 1 it all went to pot. Before Christmas he was spending the night in our bed every night and we were taking turns to sleep on the sofa as he would only go to sleep if he could take up 3/4 of the bed. For a couple of weeks after Christmas we took it in turns to sleep in his room, but neither of us can sleep well on the air bed so we were still sleep deprived. We have been trying to get out of his room the last few weeks but even when he settles down to sleep (which can take a long time) he wakes as soon as we leave the room.

He is now 22 months and we are doing gradual retreat now but it’s not really working as he just hurls everything out of his cot for attention. I have even left him to cry a few times but he screams for ages. So tonight he woke at 11 and is still wide awake, he’ll probably be awake for another hour then wake up again at 4 and the process starts again. We don’t put him down for a nap anymore during the day anymore but he does go to sleep in the car or pushchair. DH and I do take it in turns to get up with him.

I don’t know what to do and I’m at my wits end, AIBU to leave him to cry tonight?! We are so exhausted.

The thing is, it’s exceptionally rare for a child over the age of four or five to still be waking numerous times a night or to want to sleep in their parents bed every night. The sleepless nights are usually temporary and whilst utterly miserable, they’re a snapshot of your child’s overall life. Leaving them to cry just isn’t an effective method, the only reason they fall asleep in the end is because they’re exhausted from screaming and they realise no one is coming to help which is just sad really.

Your DS needs a nap, even three year old’s have a day time nap.

''Your DS needs a nap, even three year old’s have a day time nap.'

DC dropped daytime nap at about 18 months so that does not apply to all dc.