To take a pregnancy test?

[surelyitcantgetworsethanthis]

Been TTC for 4 years. Failed rounds of IVF, without even so much as a late period. It's been hell.
My period is 2 days late, very unusual. I'm now day dreaming that I might be pregnant. We really tried this month and I had a smear mid-month and dr commented was showing signs of ovulation. DH wants me to give it a couple of days, not jump straight to POAS as he knows how heartbreaking I find the all negatives. All
through IVF he was dead against early testing, always waiting for the bloods. But that was torture and inevitably we got the call either with me at work or out for lunch with was devastating and embarrassing as I'm led sobbing from a restaurant.
AIBU to buy one on the way home and put myself out of my misery? Or should I live in a hopeful bubble for a couple of days?! HELP!!!

@Weekday28 I hope not ...... I drank a bottle of wine last night. FARK!

How are you OP? Any sign of AF?

Just arrived. With the worlds worst cramp.

And now I need to spend the day with my pregnant best friend. Oh joy.

Oh that's pants
Sending very unmumsnetty vibes that you get through it ok

If you need to cancel, I’m sure your friend will understand xx

So sorry that must be so hard for you x

Been awake since 5:30. Feeling utterly shit. You think after being through this over 50 times it would get easier. It doesn't.
I bought another test yesterday, had managed to fool myself into thinking it might have been the fact that it was too early to test.
I'm lying in bed sobbing. I have no idea how I can get my shit together today.

You sob if that's what you need to do right now

Posted too soon. You can get your shit together. Even if it's just superficial. Fake it 'til you make it, is that what they say? But you've got to lift the lid on the emotions first.

A good cry helps get it all out. I got to the point of praying for an early menopause just so that I would stop getting my hopes up and could just get on with my life. I got a place on my dream university course, which I could not have done if pregnant and pushed my life in a different direction. But still had my hopes up before each period.

Went out and surprisingly had a good afternoon. Although I bought my pregnant friend a gift from a maternity clothing brand and now all my social media feed is full of pictures of beautiful pregnant women !! FML I just can't escape it ......

@surelyitcantgetworsethanthis every time you see an add click the little button that says you don't want to see it and eventually they get the picture.

Don’t lose hope, you’ve potentially got another 15 years to keep trying, you’re not menopausal yet! Fuck what the stick says, you’ve still got time yet

Big hugs, you sound strong 👍😊

I'm 40 this year, I appreciate it won't just 'happen naturally' I'm a physically very fit nearly 40 years old. But still, no amount of water and veg can steal me back 10 years ......

Oh op. I’m really sorry. I really hope you get your baby soon. You sound like such a strong woman. X

Here are tricks from a amazing midwife. I did research and she has the highest success rate with ivf in the state of California (a big state of nearly 40 million people)

Get, from Amazon, a more expensive ovulation tracker called Ovuquick. She said for most women the standard pee checkers are slightly off and the egg is wasted. This more expensive one is bang on. Next, get from Amazon or wherever a vitamin pack for men called Proxseed. Have your guy take it daily (also biking, very hot showers and tighty whities all need to be avoided by him). Finally if you have not had your tubes blown out please get that done. They shoot some dye through to look for blockages but she says the process seems to get things cranking.

The very heavy cramps probably mean you did conceive but the embryo wasn’t quite right and didn’t implant. This is normal. 70% of conceptions don’t make because they aren’t quite ok and we never know about it. Just a late heavy period and bad cramps.

I had my first baby one week from 40 with AI. The second at 42 was an accident and the third at 44 was with the help outlined above.

Good luck!!

Really @Dolceandi ..... I'll choose to ignore your post. But thank you for your helpful insight into my choices.

Sorry this wasn't the news tou wanted OP.

Post in infertility next time op. People there (generally) actually get it and don’t post unhelpful nonsense.

@Dolceandi.

Maybe get yourself an education in sensitivity.

Good luck for the next coming months OP!