To take a pregnancy test?

[surelyitcantgetworsethanthis]

Been TTC for 4 years. Failed rounds of IVF, without even so much as a late period. It's been hell.
My period is 2 days late, very unusual. I'm now day dreaming that I might be pregnant. We really tried this month and I had a smear mid-month and dr commented was showing signs of ovulation. DH wants me to give it a couple of days, not jump straight to POAS as he knows how heartbreaking I find the all negatives. All
through IVF he was dead against early testing, always waiting for the bloods. But that was torture and inevitably we got the call either with me at work or out for lunch with was devastating and embarrassing as I'm led sobbing from a restaurant.
AIBU to buy one on the way home and put myself out of my misery? Or should I live in a hopeful bubble for a couple of days?! HELP!!!

The things I've said on here are not unkind, they are my advice to other people. This is me trying to be helpful. If someone reading this was thinking of putting off having children and now they're reconsidering, good

And you don't understand how by allegedly offering advice to others you've been dramatically unhelpful and incredibly unkind to the OP? Maybe you should have a rethink on how forums work.

I note you've still not posted on any other threads so it's pretty obvious what your agenda is.

Genuine question here - do you really not understand that brandishing painful truths to someone in distress who is already painfully aware of those truths is just adding to the hurt and not remotely helpful? If you are aware, then why are you doing it?

@Dolceandi doesn't bother me, it's you know "just out of interest".

How lovely of someone with seven(!) alleged children to come on a thread started by someone going through the visceral pain of infertility to tell us all what is actually needed is a time machine. Ffs.

Lol! I haven't had the time to post anywhere else!

Yeah....I mean it takes such a long time.

Because I was genuinely interested in why people keep putting it off if they're aware it's not a good idea

Ah yes "genuine interest" is from the same place as "I've got a PhD" - i.e. utter bollocks.

@Dolceandi

If you believe what you're saying is the truth, and that the truth hurts, I can only conclude you set out to hurt the OP, who is already wounded.

Why on earth would you do that?

I know the heartbreak you feel, OP. There are options for you. You've tried IVF. Have you had any explanation for your fertility problems? IVF is both a treatment and diagnosis tool (sometimes) so you might have had some feedback as to why your cycles failed. Egg quality can be a real problem. Have you considered using donated eggs?

That's not actually an answer to my question - I'm asking if you are aware that your approach is hurtful? Do you think your 'interest' somehow trumps the feelings of someone who is suffering?

I genuinely do not know one single person in real life from when I'm from or where I live now who left ttc their first until they were 35 or over. Yet it seems to be a thing on here. Then people get upset and angry when it doesn't happen. Why put yourself through that unnecessary suffering?

For a "new" user you've a lot of knowledge!

Glad to see your post has been justifiably deleted!

@Dolceandi you claim 'I'm not as fit as I think I am' Assuming that was part of your troll PHD course. I'm interested in your intellectual thoughts on what criteria a woman of 39 would need to meet to achieve a good level of fitness.
(No idea why I'm buying into this .... but, here we go!)

Most people I know don't drink at all when they're ttc or trying to be healthy.

You obviously haven’t met anyone struggling with long term infertility.
And most people stop drinking when they’re pregnant, not before.

@Dolceandi have you ever thought that may have been a figure of speech or a flippant comment.
My DR, yes REAL DR gives me advice and I follow it. So fuck off back under your bridge.

Dear god, you really are an absolute sanctimonious goady fucker, aren't you? There is fuck all evidence to suggest alcohol prevents implantation.

Can we get this thread back on track now for the OP? This tangent is really insensitive.

But before I go I will say some other people gave you some good advice earlier, which you also dismissed or ignored. When you're ttc, don't drink alcohol or caffeine, cut down on salt and sugar, eat lots of fruit and vegetables, drink lots of water, both you and your other half take multivitamins for conception, don't wear tight clothes and do regular exercises. And don't test early, always wait until your period comes, or not

Do you seriously think in four years, the OP hasn't actually done that.

I can't imagine having such an amazing lack of self-awareness.

@Dolceandi because I'm 35 and haven't met anyone? I want children yes. But I need a partner and preferably one that I love and is decent, the ones I've dated previously haven't worked out
It is what it is, it's not my choice particularly

Lol! I haven't had the time to post anywhere else!

You seem to have had an awful lot of time to be a cunt on here.

If you're so concerned with why 'females' are leaving it later to conceive, start your own thread rather than being a heartless bitch and derailing this one. Though frankly with your huuuuuge intelligence I'm astonished you can't work out the answer for yourself.

OP

Obnoxious even by AIBU standards. Let's hope she's bringing her seven kids up to be nicer human beings, but I doubt it.