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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be really fucked with inability to sleep at night

296 replies

Reallycantbefuckedtothink · 20/01/2020 05:26

Just that really, I have always suffered with insomnia but since after Christmas, it has gone up a whole new level.

I managed to fall asleep at around 11pm woke up at 11.15 wide a fucking awake and haven't been able to sleep since.

Its really fucking me up, time spent with DS and DP and to be able to do anything at all because I get so tired during the day.

OP posts:
exWifebeginsAgainat46 · 30/01/2020 16:25

i’m a bit baffled and clearly have the most laid-back GP in the country as far as prescribing goes.

i have arthritis and pain is a real issue. i take pregablin and have a buprenorphine patch. i also have a number of psych diagnoses and take amongst other things quetiapine and mirtazapine.

i also have diazepam and zopiclone on my repeat prescription. i think they’ve been on there for so long now nobody really bothers about them any more. or about guidelines!

i still can’t fucking sleep though. i went in for surgery yesterday and they couldn’t safely anaesthetise me so they woke me up again and sent me home. so i have a broken brain, terrible thyroid issues and broken body from arthritis. i can’t go striding about in the fresh air. i can barely get dressed some days. and yet, sleep eludes me.

so here on the flip side, where doctors throw z-drugs and valium at me, i still can’t sleep.

PatellarTendonitis · 30/01/2020 16:41

Sounds like you've got a typical Fob 'Em Off piss artist for a GP there, Client. Not at all surprised Sad. That comment about the back pain is so dismissive and patronising.

ex you are quite lucky. Since the guidelines have changed it's nigh on impossible to get diazepam or z-drugs.

ClientQueen · 30/01/2020 17:34

@PatellarTendonitis I won't mention the abnormal bloods they missed for EIGHT years. When they eventually spotted them I was sent to haematology as an emergency
My usual doctor is v good, when I staggered in with my back pain before my op she was typing up prescriptions before my sore bum hit the chair and she sent me out with diazepam and all sorts but she wasn't available. Usually she gives me a week of zopiclone to reset me and I'm fine

Zombieseverywhere · 30/01/2020 18:45

Another insomniac to join the chat.
Suffered for years now, it's so utterly depressing. I have a lot of health conditions, I'm on tonnes of medication but still very little sleep. Quite often go sleep about 1am, up at 3, back to sleep about 5 then up at 6.ive started napping in the afternoon as couldn't carry on any longer. Nothing helps me sleep at night so catch up in day.

Herringbone31 · 30/01/2020 18:50

Another chronic insomniac also

I was awake 11 days once! I had to go to hospital to get out to sleep medically. Was the longest. More boring part of my life

I now take melatonin and sleeping tablets. Only way for me to survive.

I’m knocked out on many hormones though. I take 3 lots for replacement.

Herringbone31 · 30/01/2020 18:54

I’m not an Anxious person either. I don’t really have any anxiety or stress in my life

I do a multitude of things. A shower after I’ve taken my meds. As apparently if you warm your core temp up. That starts your own melatonin production

Blue light glasses. So to stop blue light. I wear them from 6 pm.

No caffeine after 5pm.

I do mindfulness. Mediation a lot. Love it. Have done it for 10 years now

The other thing (which is Not recommenced at all). But I listen to friends. On my iPad. I don’t watch it. But if I’m listening to it. Then I have no thoughts that keep me awake. Bad habit. But it works for me massively.

Herringbone31 · 30/01/2020 18:56

Sorry. Keep pressing post too soon

I listen to my iPad. To friends. I know it word for word. I listen to it almost all night. If I wake. The headphones are straight back in. It works so well for me. I don’t know why. It shouldn’t do. But it does

I still have horrific sleep though. I wake many times a night to eat. For some reason. Hormone I think

ItsLegalTender · 31/01/2020 20:55

Finally got to see my psychiatrist and he's prescribed a months worth of Zopiclone

Shockers · 31/01/2020 23:17

I had 7 hours of interrupted sleep last night. It was amazing- I didn’t know what time it was when I woke (I wasn’t working today), because it was light outside. I had three nights of 5-6 hours prior to last night; previously, 3-4 broken hours was all I’d get.

Changes I’ve made are: I only drink decaf coffee; no alcohol at all; a weighted blanket, and no food after 6pm.

I stopped drinking alcohol at Christmas, but the other changes have been in the last 10 days.

The weighted blanket is wonderful.

This is despite chronic pain too.

I’m not suggesting that everyone will experience the same results, but it’s working for me.

ItsLegalTender · 02/02/2020 13:13

I love my weighted blanket

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 02/02/2020 14:56

Am intrigued by the weighed blankets - how do they make you sleep better?

Shockers · 02/02/2020 16:20

I don’t really know the science, but I do know mine works for me. I tried it because we used to use them for children who were struggling to self regulate in the EB school I worked in. It’s the same principle as pressure vests, which we also found helped. It’s very calming to feel that pressure.

peanutbuttermarmite · 02/02/2020 19:17

Yes it’s related to deep pressure being calming to your sensory system - I got mine after finding they helped my children. It’s hard to describe but I feel a fairly instant feeling of relaxation when I put it on. They don’t work for everyone though and are expensive.

Reallycantbefuckedtothink · 06/02/2020 06:13

And I am back, I have had 4 days of fairly good sleep, then boom we are back to how it was.

I just dont get it, nothing has changed. I am blaming me sorting out the lego at night

OP posts:
Branleuse · 06/02/2020 07:36

I think the advice some professionals give, to "get up and do something else" if you cant sleep is bullshit too. Not being able to sleep is not because not tired enough. You can be abolutely exhausted and yet the brain just will not tick over into sleep. If im feeling like that I cant get up. Im far too exhausted. My brain wont sleep though.

For me, its better to remember the fact that a nighttime lying down resting in the dark isnt as good as a full nights sleep, but your brain and body still rests somewhat, and will be more effective the next day than spending the night active.

whatalifethisis · 06/02/2020 08:56

Mine started with the menopause. I saw 4 doctors before one would finally help me as I was feeling very unwell and unable to function.

I now take a concoction of Zipiclone, Mirtazapine and Amiltryptiline every night. It's not a good solution but I had literally tried everything else.

I also have a weighted blanket.

3luckystars · 19/02/2020 23:31

Hi, I just wanted to come back to this thread.
I heard a woman on the radio yesterday and she said that she has had insomnia for 18 years, she tried everything. She said some things would work for a few weeks but then she would be back awake again.
She was averaging 2 to 3 hours sleep a night.

Anyway, her GP recommended an app, its called sleepio, she said she is now sleeping 7 to 8 hrs every single night and the insomnia is gone.

This app used to cost $60 but is currently free. She said that the nhs and gps are using it in the UK so it is free for now.

She described that you enter all your data or wear a fit bit to record your data for a month, then it gives you a 'sleep programme' to follow. It sounded like torture, she said you have got to get back up if you are not sleeping after 15 minutes and mad stuff, but after a month of total exhaustion, her body was reset and she is now asleep within 15 minutes every night and sleeps all night.

I thought I would post it here in case anyone wants to give it a lash. It's called SLEEPIO.

Good luck!

FNuts · 19/02/2020 23:56
  1. Looking at your phone/tablet/tv when trying to sleep doesn't help. If you can't get to sleep you need to get up, take 5-10 minutes away from the bedroom, then back to bed and try again.
  2. Genuine insomniacs are not tired in the day.
  3. Most commonly, people referred to sleep clinics that say insomnia are not true insomniacs, they have sleep disordered breathing, namely, obstructive sleep apnoea.
TheQuestionSpottingMedic · 12/06/2020 11:22

I have already posted a couple of times up-thread but want to flag something to you all in case it may be relevant to you. I have experienced 7 years of intermittent, what I thought was unexplained, insomnia (I asked my GP to check back in my notes to see how long it had been going on). Last week, a new friend used the term “progesterone intolerance” when I was complaining to her about my insomnia. This always returns with a vengeance when I am taking the progesterone element of my HRT (which I started in Jan 2020) but never during the estrogel-only phase of my monthly medication. I had never heard the term before and apologies if you already have and have already ruled this out as a potential cause of your insomnia - if this is the case, the rest of my post will of no interest to you.

In an effort to try to sleep as well during the progesterone-only phase of my HRT as the Estrogel phase, my GP suggested that I try a Mirena coil as this would not only deliver the progesterone element I needed locally (and therefore supposedly should be less prone to side effects than progesterone taken orally) but also provide me with a treatment for my heavy periods and some (most likely redundant!) contraceptive protection at my age. Win-win I thought.

Since having the coil inserted last week I have experienced the worst insomnia I have ever had - broken sleep with 2/3 night wakings limiting sleep to less than 4/5 hours every night. It started the very evening that the coil was put in. Over the counter sleeping pills do not touch it and my GP prescribed sleeping pills (in case this was a teething period as my body adjusted to the coil) now provide me with only 2 hours sleep before I re-awaken. I think the insomnia is getting worse the longer the coil is in.

If I had to describe the feeling in my head, I would say that I cannot sleep at night as my mind is racing - butterflying if you will, across a variety of different subjects - all of them popping into my mind fleetingly even though my head is heavy (itchy even!) with sleep in the front part of my brain (behind my forehead). It feels as though something is overriding my sleep function no matter how tired I am. Meantime, during the day, I cannot hold any information in my brain for longer than seconds - human goldfish! Even reading a newspaper article is beyond me, never mind a whole book - Full Stepford-Wife (only without the grooming).

I suspect that I am progesterone intolerant (as my friend is) and have been doing some research. It is believed that about 20% of women are progesterone intolerant to some degree. Some women are intolerant to their own progesterone. They can experience serious PMS symptoms and possibly are at a greater risk of post-natal depression. Others are intolerant of progesterone dosages in hormonal contraception and HRT, whether administered orally or by implant, irrespective of whether they have had PMS or PND before. This brings me back to my medical notes. I have just discovered that about 6 months after I was moved onto the progesterone-only contraceptive pill (as I was experiencing heavy periods and had been taking the combined contraceptive pill since my late teens), I first complained of insomnia. However, this was an insidious, creeping up of insomnia so I did not associate its onset with the progesterone pill and, more importantly, neither did my GP.

My coil is being taken out this afternoon and I hope that I will regain my ability to sleep during my estrogel-only phases of my cycle. I will cross the bridge of whether I can solve my insomnia during the progesterone phase once I’ve caught up on some sleep!

I am not suggesting that your insomnia is caused by progesterone intolerance, merely that it might be. I am also certainly not suggesting that you immediately stop taking any progesterone-based contraception or HRT - you need to speak to your doctor first. However, I am flagging that this could be a potential cause of your insomnia. I am also wondering if not everyone has so immediate a reaction to the progesterone as I have experienced with the coil and that its effects may be more insidious. I have double-checked the leaflet given to me when the Mirena was inserted and absolutely no mention of insomnia is made as a potential side effect - brilliant.

You may want to take a look at:

www.researchgate.net/publication/13933740_Progestogen_intolerance_and_compliance_with_HRT_in_menopausal_women

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/family_planning/2758092-Mirena-Depression-Five-Fucking-years-of-my-life-AIBU-to-have-the-rage?pg=10

www.chelwest.nhs.uk/services/womens-health-services/gynaecology-services/menopause-and-pms-clinics/links/ProgestogenandProgesteroneRegimensinHRT130518AGREED.pdf

www.studd.co.uk/dep_women.php (I have never spoken to anyone at this clinic but my friend used it). Tab down to the very bottom of the page for the section on progesterone intolerance

GuerrillaShoppa · 05/07/2020 13:34

Hi - I've found that avoiding foods that are high in salt and sugar (including alcohol) in the evening can help me stay asleep. Foods high in tryptophan also help eg lentils, turkey and almonds.

academic.oup.com/ijnp/article/22/2/137/5235630

www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0149763418308613

www.healthline.com/nutrition/tryptophan

nokidshere · 05/07/2020 16:50

I've had insomnia since I was 15 and I'm now 59. I've tried pretty much everything over the years but none work consistently. It's not anxiety related, I just really struggle to fall asleep and then stay asleep.

If I'm not asleep after an hour I get up. I do cleaning, bake cakes, watch tv, [whatever]. Then go back to bed and try again. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't.

Last night I went to bed (knackered) just after midnight. I fell asleep before one but was awake again by 3. I lay in bed listening to an audio book for an hour, then got up, had a shower, did two loads of washing, some sewing, some cleaning and then watched tv until my son got up and made me coffee around 7:30am.

That's my nightly routine for about 5 nights out of 7. Sometimes I'll go a week or so sleeping ok (about 6.5hrs) but it's rare.

I have some breathing techniques that work, but again with no consistency. They will help me fall asleep initially but I still don't stay asleep.

Probably not much help to anyone sorry

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