AIBU to ask what those of you who are happy with your lives do?

[Elle7rose]

Just that really...

• What job do you have?
• Do you have a partner/DH/kids?
• Are you financially very well off?
• Are you in good health?

• Or is it just an attitude?

I'm mostly happy!

Social Worker (love it).
2 DC (older now and require little input).
Boyfriend (who is great)

No debt, financially sound (but not 'very well off').

Health is more tricky. I have Multiple Scolrisis and Epilepsy but neither impact hugely on my life currently - except to make me anxious about my future.

How about you OP.

• Good stable job with decent salary and fab boss and fun team
• Good health which I hope we'll be lucky enough to maintain
• Work from home a lot, rarely commute and have very good work life balance
• Have a DH who has my back and does more than his fair share
• One DD 6 who's relatively easy bar the odd tantrum and is well liked at school and enjoys it
• I have a dog and a horse which allows me to get away and have time for myself and make friends with a passion in common
• Family who can piss me off fairly easily but love me unconditionally and help as much as they can.

I have DH and two young children
A Part time job I love in the NHS ( although it's stressful and the commute is pants)
Financially we are comfortable and live well within our fairly simple means
All in good health. We are incredibly lucky.

I am a massieve optimist but there are things that could be better in our lives. DH not happy in his job ( although he is her perfectionist, I feel that is the cause of the unhappiness not meeting impossible standards. We have no family back up with kids - scary if anything happens to us and bloody exhausting never getting a breather.

Although I agree to some extent it is an attitude, I think that's a very 1 dimensional view. My job working with very poorly children warps my perceptions perhaps but I see a lot if people with huge responsibilities, no help and no hope and I cannot blame them for feeling like that. I equally see people who ' have it all' but compare themselves to others and feel they are missing out.

Used to be a solicitor. Now work part time in a school with children with additional needs.
Been married now divorced and happily single.
Financially I'm ok. Much lower income now though. Have no debt.
I'm in good health.
Im happy. Previously wasnt really.

• What job do you have?

Atm none, besides being a vicar's wife (which is kind of a job but doesn’t pay well 😆)

• Do you have a partner/DH/kids?

DH and tiny DS.

• Are you financially very well off?

No, awfully poor! Though we do have a big house as a result of DH's job, which is hugely advantageous.

• Are you in good health?

More or less. Diagnosed chronic fatigue last year but it seems to have cleared up, getting over C section, sort of sorting my IBS and have anxiety/depression but that’s managed atm too.

• Or is it just an attitude?

I have my faith, two churches worth of friends and support, local family including my parents and DH's daughter in same town, a lovely nuclear family and two splendid cats, a goal in life (work-wise), and a huge interest in languages, history, theology etc. Yes, I think it is an attitude thing, but it's also being married to the love of my life, being surrounded by wonderful friends, and generally feeling very lucky about…well, everything really!

For the first time in my life I feel truly happy (33)

SAHM
Great DH and 2dcs
Health is terrible had brain surgery earlier in the year and have rheumatoid arthritis.

But since my surgery my pretty severe anxiety has disappeared and I'm genuinely so much happier with my life despite the health crap - silver linings I guess.

I'm a part time hca. I love my job it's hard but very rewarding. I work for an agency so the pay is good and it's VERY flexible.

Have a dp who more than pulls his weight and ds who is 6 and a really lovely kid who's company I genuinely enjoy rather than just tolerate.

We don't have lots of money but we're comfortable enough to not have to worry about paying the bills or put food on the table.

My work life balance is good, and because I'm part time ds doesn't have to go to lots of childcare outside of school hours (only after school club two evenings a week) so neither dp or I have masses of guilt over working the hours we do.

I see my friends often enough though I don't have a huge number the few I have I would trust with just about anything and they have really come through for me a few times.

My health isn't perfect, I have back problems and various other minor niggles but it's not anything that stops me enjoying life.

I know an awful lot of people far less lucky than me, and a few who objectively have it better me.

I had a few friends die before I was 25 which put a lot of stuff into perspective, so being well, housed and fed is pretty much all I need.

I am employed 9 hours a week. DH is on about £50k, living in the midlands.

I have fibromyalgia so have to manage my energy levels carefully.

My DSs are adult and living at home, everyone pulls their weight around the house.

I do a lot of community work around the edges (church and parish council).

I make an effort with eco stuff.

I'm overweight, have grown out of being anxious about my appearance, and thanks to the good women of FWR am enjoying being a militant almost menopausal woman standing up to the patriarchy.

I’m a director, trying to transition from theatre to tv but earn my living mainly voice directing
Married for 13 years with 2 D.C. at the end of primary school
Yes we are well off, DH works in tech and an expat move upped his earning power hugely (destroyed mine totally hence the career move now) and that is what financially allows me to try to switch from one poorly paid career to another!
We are all in excellent health.

We are incredibly lucky, we met and married very young (early twenties) and very broke but life has been incredibly kind to us. I have moments of unhappiness/discontent but on the whole am very grateful for how fortunate we are and how good our quality of life is

I’m happy

I have a lovely husband and toddler

Not without money worries but we manage

Job used to be amazing and I’ve grown to hate it recently but I will change that and luckily I’m not there all the time or I think it would make me miserable

I am in ok health. I could lose a stone or two but I’m pregnant at the moment so that can wait.

DH and 2 almost teenage dc. I work part time in local govt, him full time in IT.

I consider us well off. Mortgage free and have savings.

Health - not been good in the past. More than one family member has had serious medical stuff to deal with. All fine at the moment, though no-one knows what the future holds.

Is it attitude? A lot of it is, yes. Dh and I consider ourselves very lucky.

I'm very happy with my life.

My job: I work with Mental health
Partner/DH/kids: I'm engaged to a lovely woman and we want kids in the future but not sure if this will actually happen (due to health issues).
Finances: Far from being well off, but i own my home (had help from my parents), can pay any bills the day they come (this is because i'm VERY organized and have a budget) and have a little bit of money to spend on mundane things like coffee, a new shirt, etc from time to time.
Health: Not great at all... i manage chronic pain and have some bad days and some good ones. My partner is very understanding and such a great help when it comes to this!

I am generally happy. Some days I’m just so happy (usually days off!). I know I’m lucky.
Job - teacher, but three days a week only. Would be unhappy with full time.
Family - lovely DH, happy together, two boys, 9 and 5. DC are a source of happiness and unhappiness!
Financial - not well off compared to people on here - can’t afford to save, but do have enough disposable income for occasional meal out, UK holidays nowadays. When we were struggling, I wasn’t so happy.
Health- very good.
What’s really makes me happy is my favourite hobby, writing. I’ve had a few weeks break. Started to feel a bit uneasy in myself. Did some today and feel fantastic. When it’s going well I feel so happy I skip around the house like an idiot.

Job: self employed property renovation/manager (currently less than six hours/week but sometimes full time)
Widow, two kids (teenagers)
Reasonabley affluent- kids at private school and no mortgage, but I am very careful to afford this;
I have type 1 diabetes but am in good health. I am an older mum though (had them in my 40s and will be in my 60s when youngest leaves school).
But I'm not happy just because of the above. I also have a good social circle, hobbies and a good relationship with my siblings. I feel in charge of my life and am happy with my achievements. My children are good kids, one very academic one very focussed on his future career (though still prone to the odd drunk/teenage misdemeanor). I have pets.
I definitely need to make some changes to optimise my health but I feel I have coped very well with the death of my partner and have done as well as possible to ensure my children have grown with as much advantage as if my husband was still alive. This makes me happy.

Another secret to happiness, for me, is accepting myself for who I am, loving myself. I don’t rely on other people for my feelings of self worth. Well, apart from DH and the kids.
I was unhappy when I cared about what everyone else thought about me, even people I didn’t like!

What makes me say i'm happy with my life is:

• Lovely parents
• A partner who's my best friend and has similar wants as me
• Job that i love (but awful boss atm)
• Not being alone anymore. I've dealt with loneliness my entire life and am so done with it!
• Working less hours than i used to (i work from 8 to 5) which means i get to have dinner with my fiancee and we go for a walk every day at night.
• Wanting for less in general
• Having more good days than bad ones wgen ut comes to pain

I'm a government lawyer. I'm very happy with my job. It's interesting and challenging as well as flexible and family friendly. I have a clear idea how I can progress and feel motivated. However I have been doing it for about 10 years so am fairly established now. I am single with one DS (2) so there is a bit of juggling but I have family support.

I wouldn't say I'm well off although I'm not a low earner as I am part time and childcare/commuting is quite expensive but I have a good quality of life and feel like I have what I need.

I'm very happy with my life too

Love my job
feel very content with my house, kids, pets, environment
Have lovely friends
Do lots of things that I enjoy - sports, museums, theatre, travel. Shopping too - love fashion

I'm recently single, but still feel really happy. I just think that life is so amazing and feel so lucky . I try to be authentic all the time and I think that helps me. I've also learned over the years what can trigger unhappiness or stress and I work hard to avoid/improve things if I spot a cloud. Also pretty resilient when it comes to knockbacks.

I'd agree happiness is about attitude not circumstance, although it would be harder to be happy if I was ill I think.

I love my job, my husband, and our income.

I need to improve my health. I’m far too fat because I eat too much and don’t exercise enough. I’ve really been feeling it over the past few years and it pisses me off that I don’t do anything about it, when I have the rest of my life so together.

As PP have said, it's down to attitude too.

What are your answers to your questions OP?

@Namestranger - I did a three month journalism training course and worked as a journalist for 10 years previously, so was able to find work through those contacts once I left.

• What job do you have? Teacher
• Do you have a partner/DH/kids? None, bit lonely to be honest.
• Are you financially very well off? Absolutely not!
• Are you in good health? I hope so.

Divorced, over 40 mum of 1 DD aged 8. Work full time from home as a project manager. I earn plenty for us. Live in the same village as family. Have a soppy dog. Have a casual boyfriend. Couldn’t be happier!

Bored sensless at work but very very happy in my life.

Job - recent career change from good income being self employed but fed up/stuck so taken a a more junior position in public sector to embark on new career

Family - married to dh for 10 years but been friends and on/off since we were kids and feel very lucky to have met and married a wonderful man. 2 children, primary aged who are mostly delightful!

Finances - nowhere near well off, and lower than most of our friends but we are lucky to have no debts other than a fairly low mortgage and we live fairly frugaly. We frequently holiday but I am a bargain hunter :D No real savings though but have a safety net of family and built our life to be able to live off one income if needed. Stuffed if for some reason neither of us could work though.

Health - we are all very fit and healthy. Away from our desks we all have an active life outside of the various sports we all do.