What Children’s toy still traumatises you?

[Soubriquet]

Was discussing toys from when my oldest was a baby, when I suddenly remembered that stupid singing v-tech bear my mum bought my dd.

Nearly 7 years later, and I still remember the fucking song

“I’m a friendly light up bear
I’ll teach you 1-2-3
A sleepy hungry happy bear
Hey come and hug me”

Then it would randomly go off in the evening with things like “I’m a happy bear!”

No bear...you were lucky to be in one piece

My dd had a furby for Christmas when they first came out. We took it to church that morning and then couldn’t get it to shut up. In the middle of a prayer it said boring and then started to snore. Never been so embarrassed.

I also agree about toot toot cars animals and birds. Dgs loves them.

This talking soft toy dog thing. One of its random phrases was...

'I can see you!'

Not what you want to hear when you accidentally kick it in a dark room...

I’m with Orangeblossom. Everyone had to have one, it's the first big Christmas toy crazy I remember. My parents would never have bought one because they were ridiculously expensive, and when I finally saw one in the flesh (as it were) I was hugely grateful as I found them really creepy.

Apologies.... Cabbage Patch Dolls. I should learn to proofread....

DM's Tiny Tears doll which for some reason she still kept even though her DB had poked one of its eyes out.

Woke up one morning and someone had put it on top of the wardrobe staring right at me with its one good eye. Bleurgh.

Haha my daughter had Alfie bear, just found him again after a clear out, he's off to charity soon
We bought her a moving vtech ball to try and get her to crawl, all it did was make her cry

Dd had a weird waterproof book that played a so g about bath time. It was loud and annoying. Sadly it started to look a bit grimy with mildew so had to go into the bin. Shame.

OMG I have this bear! And yes I also hate it! My DH thought it said "I'm a creepy happy bear"

We had that bear OP, and that bloody Puppy Calling walker. Vtech have a lot to answer for! Our worst, though, was another Vtech one - a pink and purple ball where if you pressed the button this vile little beige creature would pop out, with massive eyes like some sort of demented crack addict and say "Peek a boo!". Horrific!

Yep Alfie bear is a bastard. I have four children and every time I had a baby someone bought them one.

My sister had the Fisher Price jack in the box that traumatised her. It didn't traumatise me and I used it to my evil benefit.

She would also only play Operation with the batteries removed.

My Tiny Tears only had one eye too, sticky up hair and no longer peed because I'd taken her head off to find out how she did. She was never the same again.

Knuckles Mcginty! ! Love your book!! Would have been completely terrifying as a child!

Dollies - I never liked them. Also a certain knitted toy that my grandma had (think very un PC Enid Blyton) that scared me silly for some reason and I hid it in the bottom of the linen chest.

We had millions of books at home and one was of photos of ballet dancers/stage actors in their costumes. There was one particular shot of - it must have been a witch, and she had very long claw-like fingernails and scary makeup. We used to peek at it to give ourselves the willies.

@Ukholidaysaregreat I saw a copy in the museum of childhood. Just seeing the cover again made me feel sick! All the children died horrible deaths because they wouldn't behave. Grim.

We had Alfie bear for our oldest. She is almost 10.
I never changed the batteries in it. Noticed it in a bag of old. Toys in the garage, made a mental note to throw it out.
Next time I entered the garage, I accidentally kicked that bag...
Guess what started singing!

KnucklesMcGinty - my sister is slightly obsessed with that book and loves it.

A hand-me-down Tiny Tears doll with one eye, the lip colour had worn off and it's hair was matted and stuck up in various directions. It was also a strange yellowy-beige colour. Absolutely horrible, but I still felt guilty about hating for its looks

When I was a kid, I had a collection of those creepy like life china dolls directly opposite my bed, staring at me. I used to hide them in my wardrobe and my mum would put them back in the night when I was asleep. I still can’t stand them to this day!

My brother had a robot that walked, spoke in angry-sounding Spanish, had red flashing eyes and smoke poured out of its mouth. It was. Terrifying.

My siblings used to wait til I'd gone to the loo then shut all the bedroom doors so the landing was pitch black, and set the thing off walking towards me when I came out the bathroom.

I used to mid-hear it as ‘I’m a friendly lighter bear, altitude, one two three’ 😂

But yes six years on I still remember the tune (and various other v-tech and similar toy ones!)

In the 1960s my Dad's company had a sports day and I won a bendy toy in one of the races. I must have been 5 or 6. But the clown toy freaked me out. My Mum sat it on the chest of drawers in my bedroom and it seemed to be watching me and gave me nightmares. In the end it had to go!

My brothers had these Fighting Fury dolls and the ponytailed one in the photo was the stuff of my nightmares! You pushed a button on its back which moved the sword arm up and down. I vividly remember a dream when a tiny Yul Brynner double evil toy fighting fury thing chase d me around our house.

Pop-up Pirate.

Perfection! That game with the tiny shapes you had to fit into the grid on a timer before it all popped up and exploded. The fear!!!

We bought DS that bear for christmas... it’s annoying me already. Especially as DD has taken it upon herself to press the buttons for him 🙈