Bored of teacher friend banging on about how hard her job is

[JustACog]

Friend's a teacher and I'm tired of the chat about how her job is harder/longer/more stressful than everyone else's.

Almost every conversion now gets round to her moaning about how much she's overworked how much time she spends marking or planning. I do believe there is a lot of work involved in teaching and it's not a job I could do but I'm fed up of it being laid on thick. Fed up of the martyrdom around the sacrifice she's making for the children

CF said to me that I'm lucky to have my job (nurse full time shifts in A&E) as I just get to switch off when I leave and she's on the job from dawn to dusk.

AIBU to call her out on this, really feeling like I'd like to ask her what she really thinks other people do that's so much easier than teaching.

So why haven't you simply ceased contact with her or told her why her company is so unpleasant?

I suspect the warm fuzzy kicks you're getting from this thread are what you were after. A novel slant on old material and certainly reels them in - I'll give you that.

But no, teachers seem to think they are the only ones

Yes. I absolutely believe that no other profession ever works evenings or weekends.

🙄

I think there are more views of teaching on MN as all parents have experience with schools, some on a daily basis. There is less frequent contact with nurses on a daily basis. So people tend to comment more on teaching because it's more part of every day life.

By its nature, teaching isn't seen by the public every day. It's hard to know what it feels like to teach all day and plan and mark all evening when you haven't been in a classroom for years and of course the job has changed beyond all recognition in the last 20 years. The day goes by very quickly, you are constantly on your toes, adapting the lesson plan, thinking what support certain groups might need, how to move on their learning tomorrow, who to focus on and when. It can also be lonely as most of the day is you in your room doing your own thing, and everyone is busy. But great friendships can be made. Lack of respect and support from parents can be demoralising but when they do say thank you it's brilliant. The light bulb moments are well worth the hard work.

I overheard a mum in the playground the other day telling her 5yo her teacher was probably still asleep. It was 8:45am. By that point I'd already be in the classroom for nearly 2 hours. (I'm not teaching at the moment due to poor health.)

I kept my mouth shut 🤐

I teach. My daughter is ITC nurse. I have it easy. (We both love our jobs and it shouldn’t be a competition)

I’m not a teacher, I’m a school librarian. I put school, the contract is work for 39 weeks, paid for 45 and a bit. So we do get paid an annual leave allowance, and as others have said it is split over the year.
I couldn’t be a teacher, it’s a thankless job sometimes, but so are plenty of other jobs. Competitive moaning is pathetic and the sign of someone who needs to do something else. For what it’s worth if you want a fairly nice job support staff in a school is great!

Confirmation bias though isn’t it? I see a lot of nurse/doctor/NHS negativity on here but that’s because I’m drawn to those subjects given my industry (I’m not a nurse I must add)

Criticism of other jobs tends to be about systems rather than criticisms of a group, and they don't come often. I've not kept a spreadsheet on this but have never come across a nurses do this, etc., and rarely about individuals.

Threads about teachers as individuals come up weekly. Quite often threads about a teacher are titled with generalisations about all teachers, so are provocative. A snow day/strike or INSET day brings out remarkably ill-informed responses and frequently comes bashing.

I've been on MN for years, and while the general tone of the site is one of greater understanding of the job, it is far from the deification of teachers so frequently claimed.

It's not a competition, but the OP has made it one.

I have a friend like this. Down the years I have listened patiently till 2 months ago. She had stood me up because of all the stress. It was the limit for me. I told her I was upset and that, surpisin gly, the stress we were experiencing with the illness of a family member was quite intense too but I turned up. She apologised and said she sorry for always hogging things. We were fine in the end

There seems to be a pattern as every job, every school turns into a nightmare. She is a great teacher and has progressed in her career, but her attitude to the job makes me wonder why the fuck she does it.
I know she does t want to leave the kids high and dry or let colleagues down, but her loathing of the school and some of the kids makes me certain it must be apparent and impact on her as a teacher?
I too am bored of the moaning. It never changes and leaks out I to every conversation yet she is still there.
Is it a twisted sense of duty?
Or does she just not hear herself anymore?
It has worn her down but to leave and start in another career path would mean a drop in wages.

Guaranteed gigantic shit on teachers as per usual
Has there ever been a thread that bashes nurses? No.

^
This. No wonder so few want to stay in the profession.
Friend sounds like a dick. Thread started. And... lo... out all the old shite sprays about teachers.
Most of us genuinely, really care about your kids. We study hard and work hard for them. And don’t get much thanks tbh.

But no, teachers seem to think they are the only ones

So you know what people think, do you? Or "seem" to think.

Never ever seen a thread/post or heard a teacher say in RL that only they work at weekends.

I teach. I don't understand how NHS workers could POSSIBLY leave all the stuff they see and go through at their work's door when they leave. Very ignorant of your friend.

@snappycamper @Winterwoollies @Gibbonsgibbonsgibbons @cptartapp @zsazsajuju

TEACHER HOLIDAYS ARE UNPAID
*
*
TEACHER HOLIDAYS ARE UNPAID

TEACHER HOLIDAYS ARE UNPAID*

There is a huge teacher shortage so if you fancy the time off (unpaid) please do apply

OP your friend is a knob. Nothing to do with her job, she's just a knob.

Comparing the two professions is daft, different stresses, different types of work patterns, however I do think there is a difference in how the professions discuss their work pressures.

I'm a HCP and follow a lot of other HCPs on Twitter, I follow some teachers too. I have friends in rl and on FB who are medical and who teach. Teachers ime absolutely talk about fatigue and work stress much much more than HCPs. I notice that fatigue/stress posting also peaks in all formats (online and in rl) closer to the end of term. This is completely understandable but it has made me wonder about if this is accepted and normal across the board in teaching, whereas it would be frowned on to make these sort of posts as an HCP, sort of revealing vulnerability which we on the whole try not to do.
This is not a teacher bashing post but it has made me wonder if it is much more culturally acceptable to talk about these issues in teaching than in medicine/nursing.

I have quite a lot of teacher friends, a few whinge and do fb memes counting down until end of term/half term (as if everyone gets them) but most dont. One is training for a triathlon and often starts running/cycling for a few hours around 4.30pm so she definitely isn't working solidly from dawn til midnight!
I couldnt do teaching or nursing and have amazing respect for those who do.
However I work in the private sector and got my first pay rise in 10 years this year (and probably still earn less than a NQT)

From anecdote pitting NHS staff and teachers against each other to claims that teachers are the only ones who think they work hard and silly comments about the holidays...
This thread has it all.

Next up, teachers are hypocritical because schools close for PD days whilst parents get fined for holidays (see also complaints about Christmas shopping days which are actually PD days where everyone is off because the additional time has been done in twilight sessions).
Have we had comments about the "real world yet".
only here for the bingo

Real world has been mentioned Lola, do keep up!

Teacher bashing bingo card filled. Long holidays, short days, sitting around watching the kids work, moaning all the time. It's appalling, the complete lack of respect so many parents have for the people who are doing their best to educate their children. This is thread has been goady from the start and far too many of you are desperate to put the boot in. I have never, ever heard a teacher claim their job is harder than anyone else's, never mind an A & E nurse. They're far too busy getting on with their jobs to have time for odious, pointless comparisons.

Teacher here.
It's a vicious circle. Constant articles in the media about how easy a teacher's job is. Everyone has been to school and thinks they know it all. So they think they will give it a go. Then they find out it's not so easy after all. So they complain about how hard the job is. And then you get into my job is harder than yours ooo you get the long holidays.
I've "escaped" the system now and yes the hols are great. But that doesn't make up for the constant goal post moving ooo no that's last year's way of doing it! That's now classed as rubbish! You're a failure! The constant analysis of what you can prove they "know" regardless of whether they actually understand!

But if we're playing top trumps then A and E nurse wins hands down.

But anyone who thinks teachers sit down is disillusioned

Sorry smile. I missed that one.

Must try harder

I'm a teacher and HOY. YANBU. Lots of people have tough jobs. My job is tough, but it is also brilliant and the holidays are a huge perk. She needs to stop moaning.

Most professionals are over worked and underpaid but I doubt it’s much worse than an A&E nurse in this country.

Hmmm...I was an A&E nurse who retrained as a teacher due to the work stress enviroment.

I plan to train as a teacher.

I've got far too many years work experience in other areas behind me, for most of that time I completed many hours of unpaid overtime into evenings because the work needed to be done and I was the only one who could do those tasks. It's the same for many people. Maybe like someone mentioned, teachers who go from school to uni to teaching don't really fully appreciate how common it actually is.

I certainly couldn't switch off after dealing with the challenges of A&E.

@FluffyHippo "If you teach in FE - you know, those places that take your lazy, useless teenage darlings when they can't be bothered to get a job - you get twenty days a year holiday. So fuck off with your long holidays shit!"

What an awful thing to say about people wanting to study in further education.

Another teacher here confirming that we do not get paid for the holidays!

I have so much respect for the NHS staff, I would never so much as dream that my job was tougher than yours so I'm definitely on your side on this one.

@echt I’ve been here years too and from what I can recall MN is fairly evenly split with people generally defensive of criticism against teachers and their roles.

I’ll grant you specific moaning about nurses is rarer than about doctors but it’s definitely there here. Venture into the daily mail comments and there’s an abundance of it but then that’s the daily mail for you...

I gather there’s a few posters who think this is a GF/troll; perhaps it is but they’re certainly getting a rise out of people taking the OP very personally and that’s what I’m referring to tbh. Why enter into it as a battle (that’s actually unwinnable) that just makes divisions wider? Both jobs are hard as are many, many other roles it doesn’t make your particular role better or worse to be the ‘hardest’. What is there to actually gain out of winning that title anyway?

The OP’s scenario illustrated a self obsessed one-upper to a lot of people, including me, and that’s what they focussed on - not the jobs. You could have swapped the job titles and had pretty much the same results.